Why did the chicken cross the road? To kiss my ass

What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

Q:Want to hear a pizza joke? A: Never mind it's to cheesy.

Your friend is so blonde that when she was born she had no hair but overtime it grew out and became blonde.

2 guys walk into a bar. You'd hink one of them should have seen it. After all, it is a large building.

Yo Mama is so stupid, she was riding her bike down the street when she was distracted and rode off a cliff. Oh crap I am so sorry.

Gay jokes are a real pain in the butt.

Why do Jewish people like money so much? Because they can exchange it for goods and services

Q: What does DNA stand for? A: National Dyslexic Association

What do you call a pig with no arms? A pig, pigs don't have arms

A man and a talking elephant in a waist coat go to a party. The party is actually an intervention for the man because he's on drugs and is ruing his life. The elephant is not real.

why was the vampire sad? his last victim had aids.

What do you get when 100 sex-crazed gays are in the same room? About a quart.

What do Kenyans do at night? Starve.

Why did the plane crash into the mountain? Because it was being piloted by a loaf of bread.

Your momma's so fat that when she goes to the beach, she feels self-conscious in front of all the other beach-goers.

why did Sussie fall off the swing? She had no arms! Knock knock whose there not Sussie

What do you get when you a bunch of women and men with a high sex drive? A group of men and women with a high sex drive.

why did the chicken cross the road? to vote off obama

How do you get a black person out of a tree? You grab a ladder and help them down.

I used to work at a lightbulb factory... I made the filaments

why did the chef go to jail? because he was caught beating an egg

Why do u call a book a book??? Cause it is a book!!!

What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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