What looks like poop and smells like cheese??

What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was kidding about the wheels.

There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are finally spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinical depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

why did the mexican cross the road to get to the other country

What is E.T. short for? He has small legs

How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

How does one propagate a humorous reaction from peers and associates while not utilizing such characteristics as whit, jocularity, substance or auspicious punch lines? That's what she said.

Q: why did the chicken cross the road? A: nobody knows, but the road was royally pissed off.

What did the little girl with no arms or legs get for christmas? Cancer.

hey i just met you and this is crazy but hears my number so call me maby .....7 days

What do you call a fly with no wings? Joseph

Why was the man unable to get an erection? Because he was a woman

A man goes to the doctor complaining of pain. Everywhere I touch it hurts, he tells the doctor. "The cancer has spread," the doctor says. "Go home and spend your last days with your loved ones."

What did the kid see when he fell down the well? Nothing it was to dark.

What's the color of an apple? It varies depending on the type of tree and climate the fruit grows in.

What did the black boy get for christmas? An Xbox.

What's orange and rhymes with parrot? Carrot

Libraries.

Q: why did the boy fall off his bike? A: he wasn't very coordinated

A guy with no legs walks into a bar.

Once upon a time there was a very lonely man. He was kind, strong, handsome, smart, and basically everything that was good and that a girl wanted. Well, one day, through all his immense loneliness, he decided that it was time that he got into a relationship. Knowing that he deserved a competent and pure woman, he went to a local church to search for his perfect match. That night, he took home with him the most beautiful and purest of all the women in the church, brought her to his room, and whipped out his junk on her face.

How do you keep Helen Keller distracted? Find a stimulating device that blind and deaf people can operate correctly.

What is bright yellow and tastes like Gatorade? Antifreeze

Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and an avacado? Michael Jackson molested a 12 year old boy

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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