What did Elvis say when he lost his voice? Nothing.

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what did the pregnant mexiCAN woMAN say while she was giving birth? A LOT of curse words

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There are two muffins sitting in an oven. One says "boy it sure is hot in here." The other says,"yeah like 350-375"

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A man who is down on his luck was told that when one door closes a window opens. So he jumped out.

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Knock Knock. Ow! Why you hit me!?

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Where do you find your quadriplegic dog? Right where you left it.

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Itookasipasoda

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was dead and therefore unable to escape the Chick fil A bag it was being carried in.

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What looks like dirt, smells like dirt, but isn't dirt? Fake dirt!!

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You might be redneck if you are... Indian

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96

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A skeleton goes to a bar an orders a human flesh.

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Your mama is so poor that she is on welfare, but she is ashamed to tell you and cries herself to sleep every night.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody because a sponge is not a who, it is a what.

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What do you get if you put a black man in the blender and then in the microwave ? ... I don't know, that's why I'm asking.

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What is white a can't climb up a tree? A fridge.

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Everyday I'm.. Stepping on a beach. A roop a doo! Stepping on a Beach. do do do? do!!

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

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How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

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Hey guess what? Nevermind.

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What is E.T. short for? He has small legs

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why did the mexican cross the road to get to the other country

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Why was the man unable to get an erection? Because he was a woman

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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