why couldn't hellen keller drive becasue she was a women

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How many finger does a fat person have? I don't know you can never find there hands.

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What did Darth Vader say to Luke? I am your father.

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A man goes to the doctor complaining of pain. Everywhere I touch it hurts, he tells the doctor. "The cancer has spread," the doctor says. "Go home and spend your last days with your loved ones."

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What's funnier than 24? 25.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The pizza guy. Your pizza's here.

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If you live in the 'living' room, what do you do in the others? You die.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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I like turtoes.

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What's orange and rhymes with parrot? Carrot

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? AIDS. AIDS is worse.

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Whats green and tasty? Snot

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A homeless man is hungry. He then kills a college professor and has a nice dinner

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What do you call a group of homosexuals placing an order at McDonalds? Gay

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When life hands you lemons hand them back because you don't like lemons

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what did the penguin say to the dodo bird. nothing because dodo birds have bin extinct for thousands of years and it is highly unlikely for a dodo bird to be saying anything to a penguin do to the fact they wouldn't be anywhere near each other and neither species can speak.

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What's the difference between a duck?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I hate flowers and am making fun of them by messing up this originally beautiful poem about those repulsive manisfestations of pure evil.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? a fsh

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What's the difference between a duck A chair Vests have no sleeves

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A man and a talking elephant in a waist coat go to a party. The party is actually an intervention for the man because he's on drugs and is ruing his life. The elephant is not real.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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What is purple after you stroke it a lot? An eggplant

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither. The single celled amoeba. As billions of years passed, the simple amoeba began to form limbs which it utilized to crawl its way out of the ocean onto dry land. Millions of years would pass before the simplified organism began to develop into a fully functional chicken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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