why did the mexican cross the road to get to the other country

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How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

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How does one propagate a humorous reaction from peers and associates while not utilizing such characteristics as whit, jocularity, substance or auspicious punch lines? That's what she said.

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Whats the difference between a waffle and a pancake? One is made in a waffle iron. And the other is made on a pan.

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God said "let there be light" Chuck Noris said "say please

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How many finger does a fat person have? I don't know you can never find there hands.

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Lizards are like marshmellows. If you put them in the microwave they blow up.

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why couldn't hellen keller drive becasue she was a women

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What's funnier than 24? 25.

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Why was the man unable to get an erection? Because he was a woman

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LOL -LOL GUY

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The pizza guy. Your pizza's here.

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What are corpses favorite form of entertainment? nothing, there dead.

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I like turtoes.

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A father and son are involved in a car crash. The father is killed, sadly, but the boy is rushed to the hospital. The doctor prepares for surgery, and since this boy has no family-connections to her, she performs successful surgery on him, and the boy goes home after 3-5 days.

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A murder, a cheater, and a liar walk into a bar..... Woah the aptriots must be in town -Rocco Tufano

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What do you call two Ethiopians standing side-by-side? Friends

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Whats yellow and shaped like a banana? Bananas

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what did the pregnant mexiCAN woMAN say while she was giving birth? A LOT of curse words

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A jew, a catholic, and a muslim walk into a bar. Within minutes, they begin to argue about religion. After a few hours of intense debate, all three left dissatisfied and upset.

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A man who is down on his luck was told that when one door closes a window opens. So he jumped out.

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What do you get when 100 sex-crazed gays are in the same room? About a quart.

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A Squirrel jumps into a bar, lands on one of the empty tables and begins eating the Peanuts out of a bowl. The bartender thinks to himself "I really should close that window to keep the Squirrels out..."

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You might be redneck if you are... Indian

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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