whats worse than getting beaten up by a bully? realizing your fly was down the whole time and getting beaten up by a bully

2 guys are best friends from birth, one goes crazy and kills the others family and feel hatred towards each other for eternity.

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

Whats green and tasty? Snot

A guy with no legs walks into a bar.

whats worse than losing your pet rock? having your dog run over buy a car.

what did the penguin say to the dodo bird. nothing because dodo birds have bin extinct for thousands of years and it is highly unlikely for a dodo bird to be saying anything to a penguin do to the fact they wouldn't be anywhere near each other and neither species can speak.

A jew, a catholic, and a muslim walk into a bar. Within minutes, they begin to argue about religion. After a few hours of intense debate, all three left dissatisfied and upset.

Man 1: youre going to die Man 2: why? Man 1: everyone dies

A horse walks into a bar and the bartenders says, "why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because horses do not comprehend English. He then becomes startled by his surroundings and bolts out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

What looks like dirt, smells like dirt, but isn't dirt? Fake dirt!!

What do you get when 100 sex-crazed gays are in the same room? About a quart.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was dead and therefore unable to escape the Chick fil A bag it was being carried in.

You might be redneck if you are... Indian

What do you give an obese person with diabetes? Insulin.

My wife has terminal cancer.

Do not believe the sentence below. Believe the sentence above.

My girlfriend never swallows; she has a rare esophageal disease that's potentially fatal.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasn't; numbers cannot experience emotions.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? The chicken decided go get cigarettes and then hang out at a bar. The chicken sitts next to horse, the horse says "Why the sad face?" The chicken justs sitts there, thinking about the insanity that he has caused. "I don't know, is my joke not getting old?" Replied the chicken.

why did the mexican cross the road to get to the other country

What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

Your mother is so fat that she wears xxxL clothing

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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