God said "let there be light" Chuck Noris said "say please

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What do you call a black man in a cotton field? A farmer

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Q:why did the chicken cross the road. A:to get back to the farm he was raised on

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So a baby seal walks into a club.

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"Doctor, doctor! I think I've got Chlamydia!" "Yes, so you have told me. The urine sample you provided me with last week has come back positive. I'm sorry, sir, but you'll never be able to have children."

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Arent you my dark knight in black armor, you would seriously put your life on the line for my sake?

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How do you kill something thats already dead? You don't. It's dead.

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Women are like puzzles. Because prior to 1920 neither had the right to vote. Puzzles still don't

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Yo momma's so short, it's probably because she's in a wheelchair.

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A Horse walks into a bar and the barman says 'What with the long face?' and the horse replys 'i'm a f*cking horse.'

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

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What did Obama do when he heard of Bin Ladins death? He informed the nation of what had happend.

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Q: why did the boy fall off his bike? A: he wasn't very coordinated

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Religion

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Whats the fastest way to a man's heart?? Saw through his breastplate.

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Why did the man push open the door? The sign said PUSH.

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the girl. Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He has cerebral palsy.

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Joey and Haley have sex; what does he say to her the next morning? Happy 6th birthday daughter.

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I'm funny.

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What did the boy with no arms get for christmas? Prosthetic arms.

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What's big, white and will killl you if it falls out of a tree? A polar bear.

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A mogwai walks into a bar. The bartender says "Sorry, we don't feed mogwais after midnight."

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What did the pickle say to the cucumber? I am you from the future!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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