Q: What happened to Michael Jackson yesterday? A: Nothing.

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What is pink and smells like green paint? Pink paint

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A homeless man is hungry. He then kills a college professor and has a nice dinner

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How Long is a Chinese name.

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When life hands you lemons hand them back because you don't like lemons

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Playing chess with a pigeon is like having an argument with a christian. No matter how good you are at chess, the pigeon will just knock over the pieces, crap on the board and strut around like it's victorious.

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Once upon a time there was a very lonely man. He was kind, strong, handsome, smart, and basically everything that was good and that a girl wanted. Well, one day, through all his immense loneliness, he decided that it was time that he got into a relationship. Knowing that he deserved a competent and pure woman, he went to a local church to search for his perfect match. That night, he took home with him the most beautiful and purest of all the women in the church, brought her to his room, and whipped out his junk on her face.

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Knock knock. Who's there? You know. You know who? "Call him Voldemort.... Fear of a name increases fear of the thing itself."

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A man who is down on his luck was told that when one door closes a window opens. So he jumped out.

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what did max say to shelby? I hate black people.

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What type of cheese is not your cheese? The cheese that belongs to another person.

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What did the man say to the man? Awkward.

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"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Your mother." "Your mother who?" "Really?"

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What did one platypus say to the other? Whatever noise platypuses make. I'm not sure. I am sure that they lay eggs though.

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why is billy g is really supid because he gets bad grades

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How many hispanics does it take to screw in a light bulb. One. Just one. You just screw it in, it's not that complicated.

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What do you call a black pilot? Whatever his name is, you racist.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What is white a can't climb up a tree? A fridge.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was kidding about the wheels.

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Hey guess what? Nevermind.

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What’s green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

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What did the Pikachu say to the Charmander? Pika pika pikachu pika!

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What's the difference between Santa Claus and Tiger Woods They both have beards... EXCEPT FOR TIGER WOODS.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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