your mama is so fat that she weighs 261 pounds.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A Priest and a Rabbi walk into a grocery store. As they walk past the meat section, the Priest stops, smiles, and turns to the Rabbi. "Feeling Hungry?" The Rabbi reaches down and picks up a pack of Koscher hotdogs.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Two penguins are sitting in a bathtub. One looks at the other and says, "Can you pass the soap?" The other penguin says, "What do i look like, a typewriter?"

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A frog found a smoking cigarette on the road, so he/she takes it, smokes it, and explodes.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's bad for your teeth? A brick

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the little girl with no arms or legs get for christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the Pikachu say to the Charmander? Pika pika pikachu pika!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

so a baby seal walks into a club...

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How do you kill Michael Jackson? You don't he is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Whats he best type of terroist? A dead one.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

How many squirrels does it take to change a light bulb? 10 because they're so darn stupid!

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What do homosexual men do during sex? I don't know, but if you want to, I suggest you ask one of them.

thumb_up thumb_down -56

What did the English teacher write on a sheet of assignment criteria? The assignment criteria. Plus, she spelled "millennium" wrong.

thumb_up thumb_down -64

What's the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? The wheelchair

thumb_up thumb_down -122

What do you call a group of homosexuals placing an order at McDonalds? Gay

thumb_up thumb_down +145

A father and son are involved in a car crash. The father is killed, sadly, but the boy is rushed to the hospital. The doctor prepares for surgery, and since this boy has no family-connections to her, she performs successful surgery on him, and the boy goes home after 3-5 days.

thumb_up thumb_down +91

Q: What do you call a hillbilly with 12 girl friends? A: A shepherd.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Q: What's the Difference between Judaism and Catholicism? A: There are many substantial and vital distinctions between Judaism and Christianity. Of course, there are many similarities as well, primarily because Christianity emerged from Judaism. However, the emergence was not a direct line. Christianity broke from Judaism, forming a new religion, so it is misleading, however comfortable the thought might be, to believe that the two religions are essentially the same, or to see Christianity as the natural continuation of Judaism.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Itookasipasoda

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Q: what do you call someone on Anti Jokes A: Someone with no friends trying to find a funny joke to make friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A horse walks into a bar... Horses are not indigenous to China.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What did one platypus say to the other? Whatever noise platypuses make. I'm not sure. I am sure that they lay eggs though.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's yellow and has six legs ? A cat. I may be wrong about the color and the legs, I'm color-blind and I can't count.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q: How did the blind girl on the tight rope die? A: She fell because she has Parkinsons

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops