how do you make a joke act like yourself

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what looks like a banana, smells like like a banana, but isn't a banana? a fake banana

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Why DIDN'T the skeleton cross the road? ..He didn't have any private parts

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What is the speed limit in front of Liberace's house? 40mph because that portion of the road is curved.

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why did the chef go to jail? because he was caught beating an egg

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Why did the man burn his face? He went into a fire. :D

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what did jesus say to moses? jesus isn't real

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What are corpses favorite form of entertainment? nothing, there dead.

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Knock, knock Who's there? You're adopted...

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How many stripes does a Zebra have? Doesn't matter millions of people died in the Holocaust

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Have Alzheimers, Cheese on Toast.

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Why did the cheeseburger have seeds on its buns? Because it wasn't a taco.

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One day a girl comes home crying to her father. Father, Father! She says, a boy i met touched my shoulder! Like this? Her father says and touches her shoulder. Yes just like that, a bad part was that he kissed me on my lips! Like this? her father says and kisses her on the lips. Yes just like that but the WORST thing was he stuck his you know what into my you know where. Like this? Her father says as he sticks his you know what into her you know where. Yes just like that father but he had AIDS! ......( Awkward silence)..... oh shit.

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Why did the man push open the door? The sign said PUSH.

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What happened to the blonde that died her hair brown? Her hair turned brown.

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Did you hear about the fetus who met a clothes hanger? I doubt very much that you did.

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How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None

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Wumbo

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Two muffins are in an oven. They turn out delicious.

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why is billy g is really supid because he gets bad grades

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What do Kenyans do at night? Starve.

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How did the kid drop his ice cream cone? Ans. He got hit by a bus

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A mogwai walks into a bar. The bartender says "Sorry, we don't feed mogwais after midnight."

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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