Will you marry me? No, I'm cake.

Why does bobby have no friends? He's dead.

My girlfriend never swallows; she has a rare esophageal disease that's potentially fatal.

why did the chicken cross the road? to vote off obama

123457

How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

Jesus wept.

whats the difference between a chicken and a grape? there both green exept for the chicken

Q - Why did the boy die? A - He had AIDS because his father raped him.

How do you kill something thats already dead? You don't. It's dead.

What's worse than pushing a baby off a cliff?........ Standing at the bottom with a pitchfork....!

A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

How did the little boy break his arm? He was trampleed by elephants.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing. I lied about the deer.

Whats worse then the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple

Knock Knock Who's there? Donald Trump Donald Trump who? I already told you my full name. You're fired!

Your mommas so fat that she has developed adult onset diabetes.

Arrow to the Knee

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A bench is created to be used by multiple people for sitting down or other forms of rest, and does not have consciousness or the complex body systems of humans and other animals.

What did the man say to the man? Awkward.

What do you get when 100 sex-crazed gays are in the same room? About a quart.

What type of cheese is not your cheese? The cheese that belongs to another person.

The NBA lockout

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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