Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What did he hellen keller say to her dad ? Nothing she cant talk

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What looks like poop and smells like cheese??

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was kidding about the wheels.

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are finally spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinical depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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Lizards are like marshmellows. If you put them in the microwave they blow up.

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who farted i did :]

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Whats he best type of terroist? A dead one.

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Q. why can't hellen keller drive? A. because she is dead

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Will you marry me? I'm an atheist. ,.

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How did the little boy break his arm? He was trampleed by elephants.

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A father and son are involved in a car crash. The father is killed, sadly, but the boy is rushed to the hospital. The doctor prepares for surgery, and since this boy has no family-connections to her, she performs successful surgery on him, and the boy goes home after 3-5 days.

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What happened to the guy who ate the alarm clock at 6 o'clock in the morning? He died

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what is the difference of left and right? i used my right hand to stab your mother.

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what did the pregnant mexiCAN woMAN say while she was giving birth? A LOT of curse words

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How do you keep Helen Keller distracted? Find a stimulating device that blind and deaf people can operate correctly.

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Do you know what really makes me smile? Facial Muscles.

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So an asian man gets into a car... and drives home on the highway driving at the approximate speed of the designated speed limit while exhibiting safe driving maneuvers. He arrives home to his wife and kids and sits down for a nice dinner while having a engaging conversation about the political future of the United States and his favorite football team.

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A man walks into a bar... But, it's not funny because he's an alcoholic and it's destroying his family.

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Q: What's the Difference between Judaism and Catholicism? A: There are many substantial and vital distinctions between Judaism and Christianity. Of course, there are many similarities as well, primarily because Christianity emerged from Judaism. However, the emergence was not a direct line. Christianity broke from Judaism, forming a new religion, so it is misleading, however comfortable the thought might be, to believe that the two religions are essentially the same, or to see Christianity as the natural continuation of Judaism.

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Man 1: youre going to die Man 2: why? Man 1: everyone dies

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What happened to the public server who went to the 5 dollar brothel? He contracted syphilis and died several months later.

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What's funner than a barrel of monkeys ? Not the Holocaust .

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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