who farted i did :]

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A man walks into a bar. "Excuse me sir," he asks, "may I have a beer?" "No," says the bartender.

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hi

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Whats he best type of terroist? A dead one.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she.

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A man sees a hitchhiker on a road. The man crashes because he was not watching the road.

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What's the difference between a duck? An armchair, because a vest has no sleeves.

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What's the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? The wheelchair

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Whats the fastest way to a man's heart?? Saw through his breastplate.

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Playing chess with a pigeon is like having an argument with a christian. No matter how good you are at chess, the pigeon will just knock over the pieces, crap on the board and strut around like it's victorious.

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What did the African boy get for his Christmas present for the first time? Leprosy

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Why did the window break? I threw a pig out it.

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Woah again Nero, you are so wise... I love you, I really do. If someone can and has already changed the world for the better, its you. No wonder people believe you have superhuman abilities, I used to think so too, but I think I understand what humans can do on another level now, you did that, thank you.

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A man walks into a bar... But, it's not funny because he's an alcoholic and it's destroying his family.

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A girl walks into a bar. She unfortunately meets a man with a drinking problem. The man takes her home, strips her of her virginity and then beats her with a bat until she can no longer breathe. Her name was Laura Pratz.

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What did the thief get for Christmas? Nothing. He was sentenced to the death penalty.

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knock knock. I have a doorbell, you don't have to knock.

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what's harder than dodging bullets? dodging rain

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Q. Whats the difference between watermelons and people? A. Watermelons don't smoke pot...

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what looks like a banana, smells like like a banana, but isn't a banana? a fake banana

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96

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Where does the king keep his armies? In a variety of military barracks and bases situated around his kingdom where they are ready to be deployed for combat or peacekeeping operations.

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Q. What's funnier than an anti-joke? A. Thousands of anti-jokes, compiled on a worldwide network.

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A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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