Noses are red, pilots are blue I am dyxslexic boo who

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did he hellen keller say to her dad ? Nothing she cant talk

thumb_up thumb_down +9

how do you make a baby float take you foot of its head

thumb_up thumb_down +7

why was the man itchy? because he had herpies

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is white, and hurts when it falls from a tree? -tom

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why is Kayne West such a jerk? He has autism.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? As Suzy neared the ground while swinging, her foot caught a small hole in the swingset's pebble foundation, and the power of Suzy's momentum along with the sudden stop of Suzy's swing forced Suzy to fly forward off of the swing. Suzy, seeing the silliness of her mistake, laughed it off, and tried to get back up. She quickly realized that her leg had snapped in half. Suzy will never walk again.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why is ur cousin gay? because ya dad

thumb_up thumb_down -21

LOL -LOL GUY

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q. why can't hellen keller drive? A. because she is dead

thumb_up thumb_down -35

What's the difference between your mom and a toaster? A toaster won't period in your cereal bowl.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

A man walks into a bar and says: "ouch!"

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Hello, nice to meet you.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

Knock Knock Who's there? Donald Trump Donald Trump who? I already told you my full name. You're fired!

thumb_up thumb_down +62

I know a lady who is SOOO fat that when she steps into the ocean, she gets her toes wet!

thumb_up thumb_down +60

Playing chess with a pigeon is like having an argument with a christian. No matter how good you are at chess, the pigeon will just knock over the pieces, crap on the board and strut around like it's victorious.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

Why did the hamster run around the wheel.? Because he lived in a small cage and had nothing better to do.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Q: What do you call a hillbilly with 12 girl friends? A: A shepherd.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

A man walks into a bar... But, it's not funny because he's an alcoholic and it's destroying his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Why did the window break? I threw a pig out it.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Why do Mexicans like to eat burritos? They are delicious.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops