Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

What came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither. The single celled amoeba. As billions of years passed, the simple amoeba began to form limbs which it utilized to crawl its way out of the ocean onto dry land. Millions of years would pass before the simplified organism began to develop into a fully functional chicken.

A horse walks into a bar... Horses are not indigenous to China.

A blond and a brunette took an IQ test. Both of them scored above average.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have to go to the bathroom...

roses are red violets are blue the stems are green they smell good

A Priest and a Rabbi walk into a grocery store. As they walk past the meat section, the Priest stops, smiles, and turns to the Rabbi. "Feeling Hungry?" The Rabbi reaches down and picks up a pack of Koscher hotdogs.

What do you call a brunette between two blondes? Susan.

A nuclear reactor explodes and all the waste are going straight out in the ocean. Look at my new shoes.

What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't make for a very good accountant.

What do you call a muslim with an RPG? Holy Shiite

Jesus wept.

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? As Suzy neared the ground while swinging, her foot caught a small hole in the swingset's pebble foundation, and the power of Suzy's momentum along with the sudden stop of Suzy's swing forced Suzy to fly forward off of the swing. Suzy, seeing the silliness of her mistake, laughed it off, and tried to get back up. She quickly realized that her leg had snapped in half. Suzy will never walk again.

Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

how to u kill a baby with no arms, throw it in a pool

why cant the black guy vote? because hes not 18 yet.

Two guys walk in to a bar the third one ducks.

Women deserve equal rights... April fools.

What color is a banana? yellow.

Women are like puzzles. Because prior to 1920 neither had the right to vote. Puzzles still don't

what did jesus say to moses? jesus isn't real

How do you kill Michael Jackson? You don't he is dead.

What's orange and rhymes with parrot? Carrot

Will you marry me? I'm an atheist. ,.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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