Woah again Nero, you are so wise... I love you, I really do. If someone can and has already changed the world for the better, its you. No wonder people believe you have superhuman abilities, I used to think so too, but I think I understand what humans can do on another level now, you did that, thank you.

1134

A girl walks into a bar. She unfortunately meets a man with a drinking problem. The man takes her home, strips her of her virginity and then beats her with a bat until she can no longer breathe. Her name was Laura Pratz.

What did the thief get for Christmas? Nothing. He was sentenced to the death penalty.

what's harder than dodging bullets? dodging rain

knock knock. I have a doorbell, you don't have to knock.

Q. Whats the difference between watermelons and people? A. Watermelons don't smoke pot...

What happens when you throw a red rock in a green pond? It sinks.

96

What do you call a brunette between two blondes? Susan.

I went to see a fight and all of a sudden a hockey game broke out.

What looks like poop and smells like cheese??

all ur antijoke are belong to us or i mean we can share, whatever

Why is Kayne West such a jerk? He has autism.

Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

What's a vampire's favorite subject in school? Probably math.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

Women deserve equal rights... April fools.

Q - Why did the boy die? A - He had AIDS because his father raped him.

what do you call a gay kid? KIRK, SAV, FRANK, or even KIRKLE THE TURTLE

There was a small boy with a lollipop and a spinning hat. He died of lieukemia.

so a baby seal walks into a club...

What's the color of an apple? It varies depending on the type of tree and climate the fruit grows in.

What do you do to someone you hate very much? You kill them.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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