I went to see a fight and all of a sudden a hockey game broke out.

Knock Knock, Get the f*ck off my porch

What do you call a muslim with an RPG? Holy Shiite

how do you get a cow in the fridge? Open the fridge, and insert. How do you get a kangaroo in the fridge? Take the cow out and insert What animal is not in the lion king? kangaroo --WHY hes still in the fridge

What's the difference between donuts and dead babies I don't have a pile of donuts in my garage

Why was the man unable to get an erection? Because he was a woman

Women deserve equal rights... April fools.

LOL -LOL GUY

There was a small boy with a lollipop and a spinning hat. He died of lieukemia.

How do you kill something thats already dead? You don't. It's dead.

Your mother is such a whore that she has consensual sex with a lot of people...

A fish walks into a bad Fish dont walk

Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she.

What do homosexual men do during sex? I don't know, but if you want to, I suggest you ask one of them.

What did the English teacher write on a sheet of assignment criteria? The assignment criteria. Plus, she spelled "millennium" wrong.

Whats green and tasty? Snot

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I like to sniff your hair when you are asleep.

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They brutally whipped and tortured her.

1134

what do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? names.

A girl walks into a bar. She unfortunately meets a man with a drinking problem. The man takes her home, strips her of her virginity and then beats her with a bat until she can no longer breathe. Her name was Laura Pratz.

Inquiry: After the specially hired detective in shades of black had managed to finish his secret investigation of the crime scene, what significant affair did he demand and expect to subsequently occur next in the logical chain of events? Answer: A specific transaction of money. To elaborate, immediate providance of previously allotted recompense in the particular configuration of myriad pristine wads of cash.

a duck walks into a bar, sits down and asks for grapes. the bartender says, "no, we don't serve grapes." so the duck leaves. the next day the duck goes back to the bar, takes a seat. "got any grapes?" the bartender says, "i already told you we don't serve grapes here. if you come in here and ask for grapes one more time, i'm going to staple your beak to the wall!" the duck leaves. the next day, the duck returns, sits at the bar and asks, "got any staples?" the bartender replies, "no, but there's an Office Max next door where you might find some."

A Priest and a Rabbi walk into a grocery store. As they walk past the meat section, the Priest stops, smiles, and turns to the Rabbi. "Feeling Hungry?" The Rabbi reaches down and picks up a pack of Koscher hotdogs.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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