Knock-knock. Who's there? Just open the damn door

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Noses are red, pilots are blue I am dyxslexic boo who

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Whats orange and has stripes? - a tiger

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how do you make a baby float take you foot of its head

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How many republicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Typically only one, though more may be required under extreme conditions.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

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why was the man itchy? because he had herpies

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It was the eve of December and a man was using a blanket why? because it was cold and he wanted to be able to function properly at work so his boss would not get mad at him because he respected his boss and wanted to make him happy

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What is white, and hurts when it falls from a tree? -tom

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't.

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What do you call a fly with no wings? Joseph

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hrih

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What do you get if you cross a chicken and a potato? Answer- Chicken tasted potato

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*Random individual accidentally throws a ball toward another person's head while chilling out with friends* *The ball comes into contact with the victim's cranium- causing him much pain, but not serious detriment.* Q: Are you feeling okay? A: No, I'm dizzy and am currently in very bad shape Response after initial inquiry was articulated: "Uhmmmm...Sorry?" Lesson of significance to be learned from this tragic incident: One's developed, habitual reactions to certain occasions/events of particular interest are virtually always practically impossible to completely override with the means of logic when one is experiencing the relevant occurances him/herself personally. One usually finds it inordanitely difficult to free him/herself from one's regular routines.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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whats worse than getting beaten up by a bully? realizing your fly was down the whole time and getting beaten up by a bully

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Runescape.

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Why did Aodhan not come into school? He was sick.

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What do you call two Ethiopians standing side-by-side? Friends

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What is bright yellow and tastes like Gatorade? Antifreeze

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Q: what do you call someone on Anti Jokes A: Someone with no friends trying to find a funny joke to make friends.

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What type of cheese is not your cheese? The cheese that belongs to another person.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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