What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing. I lied about the deer.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I got a terminal disease and I'm going to die in six months. Mom if you're reading this I love you. Take good care of Joey.

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If a tree falls on a house and there's no one there to hear it....Why was there no woman in the kitchen?

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Arrow to the Knee

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3 jews are walking into a bar. the first jew orders a shot of vodka, drinks it and says "long live my family!" the second jew orders a shot of whiskey, drinks it and says "long live my friends" the third jew orders water, because he is the one that is driving tonight.

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A girl walks into a bar. She unfortunately meets a man with a drinking problem. The man takes her home, strips her of her virginity and then beats her with a bat until she can no longer breathe. Her name was Laura Pratz.

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This comment is anti to jokes.

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Knock, knock! “Who's there?” “The Gestapo.”

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A BABY seal walks into a club

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither. The single celled amoeba. As billions of years passed, the simple amoeba began to form limbs which it utilized to crawl its way out of the ocean onto dry land. Millions of years would pass before the simplified organism began to develop into a fully functional chicken.

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What is worse than getting mud on your brand new t-shirt? Getting stabbed.

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what is not funny? This joke.

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What did the man say to the man? Awkward.

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A horse walks into a bar and then out of the bar

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What do you get when you a bunch of women and men with a high sex drive? A group of men and women with a high sex drive.

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What do stuffed animals and living animals have in common? There both living except the stuffed animal.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't make for a very good accountant.

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what does a jew want most for hanukkah? presents

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What did it say in the end of the book? The End.

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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What’s green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

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What happened to the Caucasian man who went to Vegas? He lost all his money so the government took away his car and his house so he had to become homeless and live on the streets begging for money from any who walked by until he slowly starved to death after eating food left in restaurants and trashcans.

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Knock knock. Whose there. Uninterupting black lady. Uninter.... MMMMMMMHHHHMMMM. Black ladies never listen

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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