Q - Why did the boy die? A - He had AIDS because his father raped him.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call a group of black men jumping off a building? Chocolate Rain

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's the color of an apple? It varies depending on the type of tree and climate the fruit grows in.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Yo momma's so short, it's probably because she's in a wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

whats worse than getting beaten up by a bully? realizing your fly was down the whole time and getting beaten up by a bully

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's the difference between a tube of toothpaste and Youtube? If you squeeze a tube of toothpaste then toothpaste comes out. You cannot squeeze Youtube because it is a popular video sharing website. Even if you could squeeze it, no toothpaste would come out..

thumb_up thumb_down -35

What did the English teacher write on a sheet of assignment criteria? The assignment criteria. Plus, she spelled "millennium" wrong.

thumb_up thumb_down -65

Q: why did the boy fall off his bike? A: he wasn't very coordinated

thumb_up thumb_down -95

What's the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? The wheelchair

thumb_up thumb_down -123

what is the difference of left and right? i used my right hand to stab your mother.

thumb_up thumb_down +56

Playing chess with a pigeon is like having an argument with a christian. No matter how good you are at chess, the pigeon will just knock over the pieces, crap on the board and strut around like it's victorious.

thumb_up thumb_down +56

what did the penguin say to the dodo bird. nothing because dodo birds have bin extinct for thousands of years and it is highly unlikely for a dodo bird to be saying anything to a penguin do to the fact they wouldn't be anywhere near each other and neither species can speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

What's the difference between a duck?

thumb_up thumb_down +50

What is bright yellow and tastes like Gatorade? Antifreeze

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Q: How do you get a bunch of mexicans attention? A: Say excuse me, can I have your attention please?

thumb_up thumb_down +42

If a tree falls on a house and there's no one there to hear it....Why was there no woman in the kitchen?

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What's sad about a house on fire?, it was my house.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

This comment is anti to jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A black kid, an Asian kid, and a Jewish kid walk into a barrier. They are students at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and they walk straight through the barrier onto Platform 9 3/4.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Q. Whats the difference between watermelons and people? A. Watermelons don't smoke pot...

thumb_up thumb_down +24

96

thumb_up thumb_down +22

a duck walks into a bar, sits down and asks for grapes. the bartender says, "no, we don't serve grapes." so the duck leaves. the next day the duck goes back to the bar, takes a seat. "got any grapes?" the bartender says, "i already told you we don't serve grapes here. if you come in here and ask for grapes one more time, i'm going to staple your beak to the wall!" the duck leaves. the next day, the duck returns, sits at the bar and asks, "got any staples?" the bartender replies, "no, but there's an Office Max next door where you might find some."

thumb_up thumb_down +20

your mama is so fat that she weighs 261 pounds.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Will you marry me? No, I'm cake.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops