What's a vampire's favorite subject in school? Probably math.

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Two guys walk in to a bar the third one ducks.

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What do you call a fly with no wings? Joseph

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Q - Why did the boy die? A - He had AIDS because his father raped him.

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What do you call a group of black men jumping off a building? Chocolate Rain

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What color is a banana? yellow.

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What's the color of an apple? It varies depending on the type of tree and climate the fruit grows in.

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whats worse than getting beaten up by a bully? realizing your fly was down the whole time and getting beaten up by a bully

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Yo momma's so short, it's probably because she's in a wheelchair.

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*Random individual accidentally throws a ball toward another person's head while chilling out with friends* *The ball comes into contact with the victim's cranium- causing him much pain, but not serious detriment.* Q: Are you feeling okay? A: No, I'm dizzy and am currently in very bad shape Response after initial inquiry was articulated: "Uhmmmm...Sorry?" Lesson of significance to be learned from this tragic incident: One's developed, habitual reactions to certain occasions/events of particular interest are virtually always practically impossible to completely override with the means of logic when one is experiencing the relevant occurances him/herself personally. One usually finds it inordanitely difficult to free him/herself from one's regular routines.

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What are corpses favorite form of entertainment? nothing, there dead.

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What's the difference between a tube of toothpaste and Youtube? If you squeeze a tube of toothpaste then toothpaste comes out. You cannot squeeze Youtube because it is a popular video sharing website. Even if you could squeeze it, no toothpaste would come out..

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What did the English teacher write on a sheet of assignment criteria? The assignment criteria. Plus, she spelled "millennium" wrong.

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Q: why did the boy fall off his bike? A: he wasn't very coordinated

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What's the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? The wheelchair

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what is the difference of left and right? i used my right hand to stab your mother.

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Playing chess with a pigeon is like having an argument with a christian. No matter how good you are at chess, the pigeon will just knock over the pieces, crap on the board and strut around like it's victorious.

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what did the penguin say to the dodo bird. nothing because dodo birds have bin extinct for thousands of years and it is highly unlikely for a dodo bird to be saying anything to a penguin do to the fact they wouldn't be anywhere near each other and neither species can speak.

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What's the difference between a duck?

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What is bright yellow and tastes like Gatorade? Antifreeze

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Q: How do you get a bunch of mexicans attention? A: Say excuse me, can I have your attention please?

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If a tree falls on a house and there's no one there to hear it....Why was there no woman in the kitchen?

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What's sad about a house on fire?, it was my house.

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This comment is anti to jokes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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