Q. Whats the difference between watermelons and people? A. Watermelons don't smoke pot...

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartenders says, "why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because horses do not comprehend English. He then becomes startled by his surroundings and bolts out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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"The lack of a punch line is the punch line" Oh

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Why can't Michael Jackson drive? Because he's dead.

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Roses are Red Voilets are Red I am Red I am Dead

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Why does an Irish cop wear a belt? To hold up his pants.

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A mogwai walks into a bar. The bartender says "Sorry, we don't feed mogwais after midnight."

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Will you marry me? No, I'm cake.

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What's the worst part about male roller blading? AIDS.

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My girlfriend never swallows; she has a rare esophageal disease that's potentially fatal.

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why does breanna love pie? BECAUSE ITS JIMMYS LAST NAME!!!

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Why did the motorcyclist die? I heard he was sat on by Chuck Norris.

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What's green and looks like a forest? A forest.

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How do you fit 100 babies in a bucket? put them in a blender. How do you get them out? potato chips.

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Why can't women drive? Actually, they can as long as they legally acquire a driver's license and have no existing restrictions.

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? As Suzy neared the ground while swinging, her foot caught a small hole in the swingset's pebble foundation, and the power of Suzy's momentum along with the sudden stop of Suzy's swing forced Suzy to fly forward off of the swing. Suzy, seeing the silliness of her mistake, laughed it off, and tried to get back up. She quickly realized that her leg had snapped in half. Suzy will never walk again.

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Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

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wats worse than gettin bitched at by ur mom? gettin raped by a giant scorpian n getting SUPER ULTRA MEGA AIDS

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What is the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A Mexican is a human being of Aztec descent, while a bench is an inanimate object used most frequently as a place to sit.

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what did batman Say to robin before they got into the car? get in the car

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What a vase and a cheeseburger have in common? It has it's price.

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Libraries.

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Kony 2012

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A guy with no legs walks into a bar.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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