Why did the chess grandmaster lose his mind? Because he died of old age.

What did the grass say to the human "Hey" The human then screams and runs to safety

A: Knock knock. B: Who's there? A: Banana! B: Not you again..(slams door)

What is the most attractive part of a woman's body? The part where she doesn't have a penis. I know, I know, the no-penis thing looks weird and strange, but hear me out. I think it's kind of cute and quirky. Like, oops, there's something that's supposed to be there, but isn't.

Why was the chicken mad? Because he was sick of everyone questioning him even when he crossed the road.

What happened to the blonde that died her hair brown? Her hair turned brown.

womens sports...

roses are grey, violets are grey, i'm colourblind and shit at poetry

lebron

what was the dinosaur after it got out of the pool? wet

What is worse than getting mud on your brand new t-shirt? Getting stabbed.

What did the small baby faucet say to the daddy faucet? Nothing, they are inanimate objects and cannot talk.

Why was the black man unemployed? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

what did the little girl do after drinking a smoothie? she choked and died a painful death.

A horse walked into a bar, broke its leg and its owner then had to put it down because it was a racing horse and the owner did not have enough money to bring the horse back to health. Fuck you.

Your mama is so fat she is morbid obese.

How do you tell if someone is a Jew? Ask them politely.

You.

Knock knock. Who's there? I just ding dong ditched you.

What would George Washington do if he was alive today? Scream and scrach at the top of his coffin.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

How did the cat die? I just it nine times

Why did the vegetarian only work one day? Because her co-workers are cannibals.

Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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