How did the cat die? I just it nine times

What's the difference between donuts and dead babies I don't have a pile of donuts in my garage

Two muffins are in an oven. They are then baked at 375 for about 30 minutes and then taken out to cool.

a 12 year eld Maxican girl is aksed to spell the werd newmonia she gets it rite and wins the spalling beef which makes me sad bcuz English is my forst langage and i still dont get it and im 25

What's worse than a black President... George W Bush

As a teen girl was walking through the perfume shop, she picked up one called, "Swirly Paradise." She sprayed it on her and sniffed the sweet scent. Suddenly, the world spun around and she suddenly woke up inside an empty bra. A mouse sniffed her and ate her alive.

What did the penguins get for Christmas? A hang-glider What did the polar bears get for Christmas? Death, The Holocaust, Global Warming, and all of Steven King's books.

Your momma's so ugly that she was worried that she would never marry anyone.

Why did the baby cross the road? cause it was stapled to the chicken.

What is the most attractive part of a woman's body? The part where she doesn't have a penis. I know, I know, the no-penis thing looks weird and strange, but hear me out. I think it's kind of cute and quirky. Like, oops, there's something that's supposed to be there, but isn't.

how do you stop a baby crying hit it with a brick.

Women's Rights

Why did the white man accuse the black man of stealing his wallet? Because they were the only two men in the room at the time of the theft

What do you call a dead blond in a closet? A homicide victim.

lebron

Chikin nuggets

what did the little girl do after drinking a smoothie? she choked and died a painful death.

whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff

I bought a DVD called "the 18 holes of Tiger Woods". It was a fascinating incite into the golfing technique of arguably one of the greatest sportsmen of all time.

A horse walked into a bar, broke its leg and its owner then had to put it down because it was a racing horse and the owner did not have enough money to bring the horse back to health. Fuck you.

When Chuck Norris does a push up, he pushes himself up.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face (pokerface)

What's the difference between a turtle and a bird? They both fly. Except the turtle.

What do you get when you a bunch of women and men with a high sex drive? A group of men and women with a high sex drive.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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