A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

wats worse than gettin bitched at by ur mom? gettin raped by a giant scorpian n getting SUPER ULTRA MEGA AIDS

An English man a Scotts man and an Irish man buy a helicopter between them,they go to pick it up after paying for it and realise that non of them can fly it. so they get a refund and go to the pub.

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

A teenage boy walks into a bar, he doesn't even know he's slowly drinking his life away

whats the hardest part of roller skating. Telling your dad that you are gay.

Want to hear a joke? Me to...

What did the guard say to the... I was going to finish this anti-joke but I took an arrow to the knee.

Why did Michael Jackson ask a Best Buy clerk for the best 3D TV? He didn't ... He's dead.

What do you call an animal who is purple and feeds on grass? Well his name is Timmy, he is a 6 year old boy and has been diagnosed with a rare deadly disease that turns his skin purple and has removed him so far from reality that he has begin to feed on his front lawn.

what did the atheist get for Christmas? Nothing. If he was being truly honest to his beliefs, he wouldn't partake in a christian holiday.

What's the difference between a black man and a Jew? Nothing, he's the same person

The pope and three young boys get into a cab. The pope tells the driver to take the boys home.

When Chuck Norris does a push up, he pushes himself up.

What is black, white and red all over? A nun in a blender

person 1 - what's big, green and ugly? person 2 - don't know. what's big, green and ugly? person 1 - nothing is

How do you get rid of a boomerang? There are many potential options for getting rid of your boomerang. You can choose to pass it on to somebody as a gift, make a profit through thrift stores or online auctions or perhaps sell it in a newspaper. Alternatively you may wish to simply dispose of it. The average reading speed of an American adult is 300 words per minute. This was exactly 100 words. This means that it took approximately 20 seconds to read it. This means that approximately 4 people died of cancer world wide while you read this.

What is green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

what do giraffes have that other animals don't have? -baby giraffes

A man walks into a bar with a couple of chickens by his side. He sees a man sitting at the bar drinking a beer. The man who's drinking the beer offers the other man a seat, and asks him to join him in the drinking. The other man hardly refuses and takes the glass from the other man and throws it on the with all his power to the floor. The man sitting at the bar asks him why he did it. The man answers: "My chickens don't like beer"

Knock Knock, Get the f*ck off my porch

Knock Knock Who's There? Boo Boo Who? Boo Smith, I'm the town rapist.

Roses are red, violets are blue, why am i even talking to you?

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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