What would George Washington do if he was alive today? Scream and scrach at the top of his coffin.

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why does king kong so fat? because he eats to much

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, why am i even talking to you?

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What do you get when you cross a pelican with a mountain goat? It's hard to say.

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why was the dog barking?? bryan is a douche..... get it troupe.

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Religion

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Have you heard of Helen Keller's dog? No. Neither has she

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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A nun, a jew, and a KKK member are all stuck together in a lifeboat. A large wave overturns the boat and they all drown.

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Why did the old woman put roller skates on her rocking chair? She had dementia.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? John. Oh, hey! Come in.

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whats black. an african american person

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Why didn't Betty ride her bike to school? She had no legs.

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Why don't Polish girls swim in the sea? The only sea that Poland borders on is the Baltic. Throughout most of the year this sea is too cold to comfortably swim in.

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Wumbo

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What did the small baby faucet say to the daddy faucet? Nothing, they are inanimate objects and cannot talk.

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender-"Hey we don't serve your kind here!" The duck-"What ducks?" The bartender -"No Jewish"

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When Chuck Norris does a push up, he pushes himself up.

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I used to be an Adventurer like you... But then I decided that it was a dangerous form of employment and stopped.

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You.

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what do giraffes have that other animals don't have? -baby giraffes

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Around a thousand pounds.

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What is white, and hurts when it falls from a tree? -tom

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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