What's my name? I don't know u tell me.

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A teenage boy walks into a bar, he doesn't even know he's slowly drinking his life away

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What's worse than a black President... George W Bush

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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What did the grass say to the human "Hey" The human then screams and runs to safety

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what is the difference of a duck..... it neither wears tie.....

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What is pink and smells like green paint? Pink paint

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Why did the baby cross the road? cause it was stapled to the chicken.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? A warm meal thanks to a Charity organization.

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Why was the chicken mad? Because he was sick of everyone questioning him even when he crossed the road.

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What's worse than being gay? Dying in a gas chamber in the Holocaust.

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What do you call a pig with no arms? A pig, pigs don't have arms

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what did the atheist get for Christmas? Nothing. If he was being truly honest to his beliefs, he wouldn't partake in a christian holiday.

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What's the difference between a black man and a Jew? Nothing, he's the same person

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What do snowmen eat for lunch? Snowmen don't eat, they're inanimate balls of of solid precipitation with rocks for smiles and eyes and carrots for noses.

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What do you call a boy that fell off a ferry? Extremely unlucky, since one of the other passengers noticed and the captain turned the ferry around, threw him a ladder, and pulled him aboard. Also he died of hepatitis because his mother was too poor to afford condoms, so he was born with it.

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person 1 - what's big, green and ugly? person 2 - don't know. what's big, green and ugly? person 1 - nothing is

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So there's this mexican with a big sombrero riding a donkey, it was a sunny day and he didn't feel like walking.

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What is green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

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Knock Knock, Get the f*ck off my porch

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A man walks into a bar with a couple of chickens by his side. He sees a man sitting at the bar drinking a beer. The man who's drinking the beer offers the other man a seat, and asks him to join him in the drinking. The other man hardly refuses and takes the glass from the other man and throws it on the with all his power to the floor. The man sitting at the bar asks him why he did it. The man answers: "My chickens don't like beer"

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Why did the vegetarian only work one day? Because her co-workers are cannibals.

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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A man walks into a bar... and watches the Monday Night Football game with his pals.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops