roses are red violets are blue you look like a monkey lets take you to the zoo if by chance you try to escape ill take my fist and smash your little monkey face! btw i made this up if you use it ill kick your nuts!!!!

What do you a a toilet with fecal matter in it? A toilet.

What's the difference between a dead baby and a Cadillac? A Cadillac is a car, and a dead baby is a morose and disgusting topic of internet humor.

What happened to the blonde that died her hair brown? Her hair turned brown.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Cheese.

lebron

I need somebody to lean on... ...Because one of my legs was amputated after I was blown up on a mine field in afganistan.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing set? She had no arms.

Whats 9+10? 19

How do you fit 100 ethiopians in a phone box? With great difficulty.

Knock knock. Who's there? I just ding dong ditched you.

How much does a polar bear weigh? Around a thousand pounds.

How do you get a one-armed Polak out of a tree? Get a ladder and carry him down.

The night is always darkest just before the dawn. Just kidding I'm Helen Keller, everything's always dark.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

A man walks into a bar with a couple of chickens by his side. He sees a man sitting at the bar drinking a beer. The man who's drinking the beer offers the other man a seat, and asks him to join him in the drinking. The other man hardly refuses and takes the glass from the other man and throws it on the with all his power to the floor. The man sitting at the bar asks him why he did it. The man answers: "My chickens don't like beer"

why does king kong so fat? because he eats to much

Why did the vegetarian only work one day? Because her co-workers are cannibals.

Yo mammas so fat she went on a diet.

Q: what did the hot dog say to the hamburger A: i want your buns

How do you occupy a blonde for hours ? Give her a long list of stuff to do.

what's funnier than 1 Mecican? 2 Mexicans

Your momma's so ugly she adopted you because she had a problem attracting men.

The Holocaust

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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