What's the difference between an orange? Mooses don't like to wear sweater-vests.

What did the grass say to the human "Hey" The human then screams and runs to safety

when god gives you lemons, you find a new god!

Why did the baby cross the road? cause it was stapled to the chicken.

How do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

roses are red violets are blue you look like a monkey lets take you to the zoo if by chance you try to escape ill take my fist and smash your little monkey face! btw i made this up if you use it ill kick your nuts!!!!

Why did the old woman put roller skates on her rocking chair? She had dementia.

roses are grey, violets are grey, i'm colourblind and shit at poetry

Chikin nuggets

A man walks around a bar.

Know what's funny? Jokes.

Knock Knock Who's there? Sargeant John Smith mam. I regret to inform you that your husband died in the line of fire - I'm sorry.

Whats 9+10? 19

Whats the difference between a new ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a new ferrari in my garage.

pedophile

Q: Why did the bully hit the kid A:Because he is a bully-I thought that would have been self explanitory.

So there's this mexican with a big sombrero riding a donkey, it was a sunny day and he didn't feel like walking.

person 1 - what's big, green and ugly? person 2 - don't know. what's big, green and ugly? person 1 - nothing is

Did you hear the one about the priest, the rabbi, the astronaut, the olympic diver, the mcdonald's employee, and the web designer? Neither did I...

What's the difference between a large pizza and a black man? The pizza is a delicious Italian classic dish, while the latter is a human being which man frown at the notion of consuming.

Two black guys walk into a country club and ask to play a round of golf. They are turned away because the aren't members of the club.

I went to the store and I fell

Are you from Tennessee? cuz i wanna makeout with your face.

Two muffins are in an oven. One says "It's getting hot in here". The other one starts to reply but then it's internal organs burst from the heat.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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