How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They brutally whipped and tortured her.

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My wife's star sign was cancer and it's quite ironic how she died really... She was attacked by a giant crab.

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Know what's funny? Jokes.

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Why didn't Betty ride her bike to school? She had no legs.

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Your so ugly That when you look into a mirror it shows an accurate potrail of your unproportionit face

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Dude, you're never going to guess how stupid my friend Philip is! Really? What did he do?? Nothing. Philip will be attending the prestigious Princeton University next year and is therefore an incredibly intelligent human-being. You're an idiot for believing me.

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Q: What is hard and long on a man? A: His wife's funeral

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I bought a DVD called "the 18 holes of Tiger Woods". It was a fascinating incite into the golfing technique of arguably one of the greatest sportsmen of all time.

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Why was the Jewish man put to death? Because he was convicted by a jury of his peers in a fair trial overseen by a judge in good standing in a United States court for 12 counts of homicide

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Q: what is more sad than being alone A: being alone with lots of cats

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Why did the man punch his wife? Because he was angry

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A man walks around a bar.

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A girl walks into a bar she is then drugged, raped and left in a back alley. To this day she still has psychological issues that are directly related to this event

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How did the cat die? I just it nine times

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Why did Sally fall of the Swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

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how to u kill a baby with no arms, throw it in a pool

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Why did Jack and Jill go up the hill? To get to their house.

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What do you call a group of black men jumping off a building? Chocolate Rain

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Roses are Red. Violets are Blue. Grandma's dead. call the paramedics.

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A Horse walks into a bar and the barman says 'What with the long face?' and the horse replys 'i'm a f*cking horse.'

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lebron

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What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Repeatedly raped by her alcoholic, child molesting father.

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Hello, nice to meet you.

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How's your mum? she's dead..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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