what does a jew want most for hanukkah? presents

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A guy walks into a bar and says, "Ouch!"

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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Your d*ck is short, If we compare it to mine. That was it, Thank you for your time.

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Q. How many pancakes can fit in a dog house? A. 0. Penguins don't like icecream.

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Why did Charlie fall? He got shot 24 times in the chest.

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What did the young girl get for Christmas? Violently raped and murdered by her abusive father.

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Skittles are tasteless. Why? You can't taste the rainbow.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got hit by a truck

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What's 6 inches long, held in your hand, and has a round tip? A pencil you pervert.

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Why did little Jimmy eat his finger ? He was hungry.

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's the postman, I have a package you need to sign for.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing set? She had no arms.

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What do you get when you cross a rhino and an elephant? Two angry pachyderms.

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-rick:hey wut happens wen i pull this pin -jerry:rick no!!!!! rick then starts to cry as he remembers the tragic accident that caused his friends death,which rick caused

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Why is the dinosaur yellow? He's not.

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A man walks around a bar.

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How do you kill a blond? You don't. If you do, you'll get reported to the cops and sent to jail.

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why cant the black guy vote? because hes not 18 yet.

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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these jokes are terrible, even for anti-jokes

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If Barbie is so popular...why do you have to buy her friends?

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Q. why can't hellen keller drive? A. because she is dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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