Susie is 14 & she never listens to her mom, why is that? She's deaf.

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How's your mum? she's dead..

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What is the most attractive part of a woman's body? The part where she doesn't have a penis. I know, I know, the no-penis thing looks weird and strange, but hear me out. I think it's kind of cute and quirky. Like, oops, there's something that's supposed to be there, but isn't.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Why'd the cat have one eye? It got kicked by a goat.

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What did the guard say to the... I was going to finish this anti-joke but I took an arrow to the knee.

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Why did Michael Jackson ask a Best Buy clerk for the best 3D TV? He didn't ... He's dead.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Cheese.

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What do you call an animal who is purple and feeds on grass? Well his name is Timmy, he is a 6 year old boy and has been diagnosed with a rare deadly disease that turns his skin purple and has removed him so far from reality that he has begin to feed on his front lawn.

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Why was the black man unemployed? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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Your so ugly That when you look into a mirror it shows an accurate potrail of your unproportionit face

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So there's this mexican with a big sombrero riding a donkey, it was a sunny day and he didn't feel like walking.

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Knock Knock, Get the f*ck off my porch

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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What's worse than a black President... George W Bush

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I love my valentine <3 Hes mine no matter what anyone says <3 Cause i love him with all my heart <3

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How do you make a man sit down? Hold him at gunpoint.

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what is the difference of a duck..... it neither wears tie.....

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How do you get a plumber to cry? Kill his family

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Why did the blond fall of the ladder? She had no arms.

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a jew throwing a dime into a wishing well.

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Why did the baby cross the road? cause it was stapled to the chicken.

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What's the difference between a prostitute and a cherry red Ferrari? A cherry red Ferrari isn't in my garage.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, most likely, the chicken escaped from a near by ranch or farm. Upon escaping, he may have simply wandered in the direction of the road, and hence crossed it. Or, with chickens having great curiosity, may have been attracted to something on the other side of the road and felt the urge to explore. Depending on the demographics of the area in which road was in, the chicken had different chances of being hit by an automobile. That's why.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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