A guy walks into a bar and says, "Ouch!"

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To be honest that sounds like more of a mental health issue and not something I'm qualified to deal with as a GP. Let me refer you.

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what did jesus say to moses? jesus isn't real

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A Horse walks into a bar and the barman says 'What with the long face?' and the horse replys 'i'm a f*cking horse.'

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What's the difference between an orange? Mooses don't like to wear sweater-vests.

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What happens when some one breaks apart your little brother's lego tower? You have a screaming little brother and a bunch of legos all over the floor.

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roses are red violets are blue you look like a monkey lets take you to the zoo if by chance you try to escape ill take my fist and smash your little monkey face! btw i made this up if you use it ill kick your nuts!!!!

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What do you a a toilet with fecal matter in it? A toilet.

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Why did the Calculus teacher give an Asian student an F on a test? Because he got less than 60% of the answers correct.

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What's green and has 4 wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender-"Hey we don't serve your kind here!" The duck-"What ducks?" The bartender -"No Jewish"

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What do you call a pig with no arms? A pig, pigs don't have arms

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roses are grey, violets are grey, i'm colourblind and shit at poetry

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What do you get when you cross a rhino and an elephant? Two angry pachyderms.

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Q: Why did the bully hit the kid A:Because he is a bully-I thought that would have been self explanitory.

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what did the little girl do after drinking a smoothie? she choked and died a painful death.

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A blonde walks into a library. "PLEASE CAN I HAVE A CHEESEBURGER?!" he shouts at the top of his lungs. "Sir, this is a library," the librarian says. "Oh, sorry," he whispers and goes to McDonald's Two years of the routine and he dies of of heart failure and has diabetes.

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how to u kill a baby with no arms, throw it in a pool

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What cheese is not yours? The one that you didn't buy.

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It's raining, it's pouring The old man is snoring He went to bed, he bumped his head Got a brain hemorrhage and died in his sleep.

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A man walks into a bar. "Ouch!" he shouted after he stubbed his toe on a table.

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what does a jew want most for hanukkah? presents

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why cant the black guy vote? because hes not 18 yet.

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Jesus

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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