Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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What's worse than a black President... George W Bush

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A black guy, a Mexican guy and a Jew walk into a hospital. They are all undergoing the same chemotherapy treatment.

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panda bears are racist to mexicans-they are black, white and asian

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Knock knock. Who's there? Awkward silence Awkward silence who? ...

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What do you call a pig with no arms? A pig, pigs don't have arms

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Whats worse than contracting H.I.V.? nothing

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What do you call an animal who is purple and feeds on grass? Well his name is Timmy, he is a 6 year old boy and has been diagnosed with a rare deadly disease that turns his skin purple and has removed him so far from reality that he has begin to feed on his front lawn.

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I'm gonna put my nut-sack on your drum set

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Why does an Irish cop wear a belt? To hold up his pants.

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What do you call a boy that fell off a ferry? Extremely unlucky, since one of the other passengers noticed and the captain turned the ferry around, threw him a ladder, and pulled him aboard. Also he died of hepatitis because his mother was too poor to afford condoms, so he was born with it.

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what do giraffes have that other animals don't have? -baby giraffes

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A man walks into a bar with a couple of chickens by his side. He sees a man sitting at the bar drinking a beer. The man who's drinking the beer offers the other man a seat, and asks him to join him in the drinking. The other man hardly refuses and takes the glass from the other man and throws it on the with all his power to the floor. The man sitting at the bar asks him why he did it. The man answers: "My chickens don't like beer"

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Knock Knock, Get the f*ck off my porch

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Why did the chess grandmaster lose his mind? Because he died of old age.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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How do you get a plumber to cry? Kill his family

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What do you call a black man and woman with a little white girl? A Family.

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a jew throwing a dime into a wishing well.

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How do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

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how do you stop a baby crying hit it with a brick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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