I need somebody to lean on... ...Because one of my legs was amputated after I was blown up on a mine field in afganistan.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman immediately calls the local stable to report the missing stallion, and his owner promptly arrives to take him home. He thanks the landlord and offers a small reward, but it is respectfully declined.

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Your so ugly That when you look into a mirror it shows an accurate potrail of your unproportionit face

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John had 32 candy bars. He ate 28 of them. What does John have now? daibetes, john has diabetes.

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What is black, white and red all over? A nun in a blender

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pedophile

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I went to the store and I fell

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Hi

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? 1. Discovering your "girlfriend" is a man 2. The Holocaust 3. Being Raped 4. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid 5. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid who doesn't wear protection.

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Yo mammas so fat she went on a diet.

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Why was the globe sad? Because it was cut in half.

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What's the difference between donuts and dead babies I don't have a pile of donuts in my garage

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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You walk in to your room. 7 chickens on your bed.

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Your momma's so ugly she adopted you because she had a problem attracting men.

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Two muffins are in an oven. One says "It's getting hot in here". The other one starts to reply but then it's internal organs burst from the heat.

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What is the difference between muffins and cornbread? I don't enjoy sticking cornbread in my anus.

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Why did Charlie fall? He got shot 24 times in the chest.

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What did the penguins get for Christmas? A hang-glider What did the polar bears get for Christmas? Death, The Holocaust, Global Warming, and all of Steven King's books.

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Roses are red violets are blue ... Aww I just don't give a damn and nether do you.

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Your momma's so ugly that she was worried that she would never marry anyone.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Animal cruelty

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What do you a a toilet with fecal matter in it? A toilet.

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Women's Rights

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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