Did you hear the one about the priest, the rabbi, the astronaut, the olympic diver, the mcdonald's employee, and the web designer? Neither did I...

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Around a thousand pounds.

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Why did Sally fall of the Swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

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Why did Jack and Jill go up the hill? To get to their house.

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A: Knock knock B: "NOOOO" A: *Comes in, sees masturbating son*

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Jesus

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So there were two palm trees on an island. The first palm tree says to the second, "Hey! What's up?" The second one replies, "Nothing much, just chilling." Except they were actually ice cubes.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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What rhymes with you? You.

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What do you call a group of black men jumping off a building? Chocolate Rain

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Roses are red It's 4 in the morning I have full blown aids I'm going to bed now, this is boring

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What's that smell? Your feces droping in the toilet

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penis

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what has green paint and flies? a garbage truck

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Why did the girl buy wine? She was hosting a party for four of her closest friends.

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What did the girl get for her birthday? Nothing...cause she died

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Your mom smells so bad that she proceeded to take a shower and then didnt smell bad at all.

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Why'd the cat have one eye? It got kicked by a goat.

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What happens if Pinocchio says "My nose is about to grow." Nothing, Pinocchio was a fictional character created by Walt Disney.

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What happens when you throw a cricket bat at a blonde? She is hurt and reports you to the police for anti-social behaviour.

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What's brown and sticky? a stick.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he met Larry.

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Whats 9+10? 19

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How do you stop a run-away bus? You sit down in the driver's seat and gently place your foot on the brake pedular and proceed to press it down. The brake pads, located in the calipers, will squeeze the brake discs and slow the bus eventually to stop at the crosswalk for the old lady accompanied by a young boy scout to cross the street and continue their wonderful lives.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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