What did the girl get for her birthday? Nothing...cause she died

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What did the nurse say to the doctor? Boo-hoo, i was pranked over the phone, i'm gonna kill myself now.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? A warm meal thanks to a Charity organization.

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what was the dinosaur after it got out of the pool? wet

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What did the small baby faucet say to the daddy faucet? Nothing, they are inanimate objects and cannot talk.

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Your so ugly That when you look into a mirror it shows an accurate potrail of your unproportionit face

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what did the little girl do after drinking a smoothie? she choked and died a painful death.

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What do snowmen eat for lunch? Snowmen don't eat, they're inanimate balls of of solid precipitation with rocks for smiles and eyes and carrots for noses.

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Knock knock Who's there? A friend. But I don't have any friends.

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Why did Sally fall of the Swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

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What do the Holocaust and baseball have in common? They are sports, except the Holocaust.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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Why was timmy crying? He gave his grandmother AIDs...

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? 1. Discovering your "girlfriend" is a man 2. The Holocaust 3. Being Raped 4. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid 5. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid who doesn't wear protection.

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Why wouldnt NASA send a blackman into space without a space suit? Because space is a vacuum there is no air no atmosphere the tempurature is almost zero kelvin so if you ever go out int space please dont take off your helmet out there because you would freeze to death almost instantaniously.

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Yo mamma's so stupid, she dropped out of college.

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a 12 year eld Maxican girl is aksed to spell the werd newmonia she gets it rite and wins the spalling beef which makes me sad bcuz English is my forst langage and i still dont get it and im 25

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A man walks into a bar... and watches the Monday Night Football game with his pals.

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An English man a Scotts man and an Irish man buy a helicopter between them,they go to pick it up after paying for it and realise that non of them can fly it. so they get a refund and go to the pub.

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Susie is 14 & she never listens to her mom, why is that? She's deaf.

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whats the hardest part of roller skating. Telling your dad that you are gay.

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Q: What do you call an aligator in a vest A: Investigator

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Why did the baby cross the road? cause it was stapled to the chicken.

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What's the difference between a prostitute and a cherry red Ferrari? A cherry red Ferrari isn't in my garage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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