Your mother is so dumb. It's a good thing she knows sign language.

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Whats 9+10? 19

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A blonde walks into a salon and says "I would like to get my golden locks trimmed." The haircutter replies "surely, just sit yourself down in that chair over there and I'll be with you momentarily." The blonde walks to the chair and sits down. When the haircutter comes over he asks her, "would you please remove your headset, I can't cut your hair while they're on." She laughs at her forgetfulness and removes them obligingly.

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When Chuck Norris does a push up, he pushes himself up.

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whats red and smells like blue paint? Hank Kovalcik

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Why can't Jay cut his hair? Because he has AIDS

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Why did the chicken cross the road? know on knows as he can't talk

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The night is always darkest just before the dawn. Just kidding I'm Helen Keller, everything's always dark.

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69.9

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What would George Washington do if he was alive today? Scream and scrach at the top of his coffin.

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Why was the globe sad? Because it was cut in half.

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You walk in to your room. 7 chickens on your bed.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, why am i even talking to you?

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What can be any colour and is made of leather? Cars. I lied about the leather part.

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Your momma's so ugly that she was worried that she would never marry anyone.

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What's the difference between an orange? Mooses don't like to wear sweater-vests.

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My Roomate-(crying in the fetal position for the love of his life has been murderer) Me- (laughing) I have a problem

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How do you get a plumber to cry? Kill his family

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What happened to the boy who fell off the swing? He got hurt.

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What did the nurse say to the doctor? Boo-hoo, i was pranked over the phone, i'm gonna kill myself now.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? A warm meal thanks to a Charity organization.

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Why'd the cat have one eye? It got kicked by a goat.

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What happened to the blonde that died her hair brown? Her hair turned brown.

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What's worse than being gay? Dying in a gas chamber in the Holocaust.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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