Q:How many doorknobs should you throw at a police man? A:None you should have upmost respect for the law.

womens sports...

I need somebody to lean on... ...Because one of my legs was amputated after I was blown up on a mine field in afganistan.

Know what's funny? Jokes.

Your so ugly That when you look into a mirror it shows an accurate potrail of your unproportionit face

Why does Jonny have a phobia birds? Because he has one glued to his face.

What do you call a black man jumping out of a plane? A skydiver

What cheese is not yours? The one that you didn't buy.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face (pokerface)

whats red and smells like blue paint? Hank Kovalcik

what do you call a homosexual kid? A Kerich

Did you hear the one about the priest, the rabbi, the astronaut, the olympic diver, the mcdonald's employee, and the web designer? Neither did I...

Why did Sally fall of the Swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

I went to the store and I fell

Why did the chicken cross the road? know on knows as he can't talk

What would George Washington do if he was alive today? Scream and scrach at the top of his coffin.

Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he wanted to get to the other side.

Q. How many pancakes can fit in a dog house? A. 0. Penguins don't like icecream.

What is the difference between muffins and cornbread? I don't enjoy sticking cornbread in my anus.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the oceon? Dead in the water.

Why did Charlie fall? He got shot 24 times in the chest.

What's my name? I don't know u tell me.

A teenage boy walks into a bar, he doesn't even know he's slowly drinking his life away

What did the grass say to the human "Hey" The human then screams and runs to safety

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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