Why did the man punch his wife? Because he was angry

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What is green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

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whats red and smells like blue paint? Hank Kovalcik

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Why did the chicken cross the road? A scorpion was trying to sting it in the anus and it wanted to escape the undoubtedly painful consequences.

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how to u kill a baby with no arms, throw it in a pool

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Knock Knock Who's There? Boo Boo Who? Boo Smith, I'm the town rapist.

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Why are atheists stupid? Actually, statistically, they are more intelligent than believers.

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69.9

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It's raining, it's pouring The old man is snoring He went to bed, he bumped his head Got a brain hemorrhage and died in his sleep.

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Knock Knock Who's There? I am. I am who? I think someone has contracted amnesia.

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Roses are red Violets are purple I just got raped by a clown

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If Barbie is so popular...why do you have to buy her friends?

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There is a running race, both black and white people are running in this race! Half way through there is an avalanche and every black person running was killed! Who won the race??? Society... :D

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How's your mum? she's dead..

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roses are red violets are blue you look like a monkey lets take you to the zoo if by chance you try to escape ill take my fist and smash your little monkey face! btw i made this up if you use it ill kick your nuts!!!!

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What is the most attractive part of a woman's body? The part where she doesn't have a penis. I know, I know, the no-penis thing looks weird and strange, but hear me out. I think it's kind of cute and quirky. Like, oops, there's something that's supposed to be there, but isn't.

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how do you stop a baby crying hit it with a brick.

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Q. Did you hear about the kid napping? A. Yeah, he woke up and was grumpy

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How did the fat man die? Someone who was mad at society shot him and many others in the head while at the workplace.

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I need somebody to lean on... ...Because one of my legs was amputated after I was blown up on a mine field in afganistan.

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What's the difference between a black man and a Jew? Nothing, he's the same person

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Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says its getting hot in here the other muffin say holy shit a talking muffin.

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How did the square become a circle? Due to the period of recession in our nation, it was found necessary to cut corners.

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A crazy priest squats down and poops in the middle of the church... nobody understood what was going so they pointed and laughed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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