Have you heard of Helen Keller's dog? No. Neither has she

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Why Did the baby cross the street? He was stapled to the chicken's back

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What's worse than one bee sting? 2 bee stings

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roses are grey, violets are grey, i'm colourblind and shit at poetry

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How do you have sex with the blue waffle? stick your penis inside

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Why does Jonny have a phobia birds? Because he has one glued to his face.

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What do you call a black man jumping out of a plane? A skydiver

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John had 32 candy bars. He ate 28 of them. What does John have now? daibetes, john has diabetes.

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When Chuck Norris does a push up, he pushes himself up.

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What is black, white and red all over? A nun in a blender

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whats red and smells like blue paint? Hank Kovalcik

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How do you get rid of a boomerang? There are many potential options for getting rid of your boomerang. You can choose to pass it on to somebody as a gift, make a profit through thrift stores or online auctions or perhaps sell it in a newspaper. Alternatively you may wish to simply dispose of it. The average reading speed of an American adult is 300 words per minute. This was exactly 100 words. This means that it took approximately 20 seconds to read it. This means that approximately 4 people died of cancer world wide while you read this.

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what do you call a homosexual kid? A Kerich

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Once there was two fish in a tank, and one said "how do you drive this thing?".

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Did you hear the one about the priest, the rabbi, the astronaut, the olympic diver, the mcdonald's employee, and the web designer? Neither did I...

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Why did Sally fall of the Swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

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Why are atheists stupid? Actually, statistically, they are more intelligent than believers.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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why does king kong so fat? because he eats to much

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What would George Washington do if he was alive today? Scream and scrach at the top of his coffin.

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Why was the globe sad? Because it was cut in half.

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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Roses are red Violets are purple I just got raped by a clown

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whats the hardest part of roller skating. Telling your dad that you are gay.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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