When Chuck Norris does a push up, he pushes himself up.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face (pokerface)

What cheese is not yours? The one that you didn't buy.

Dick Chaney

what do you call a homosexual kid? A Kerich

What's green and has wheels? A cucumber with wheels.

How do you get a one-armed Polak out of a tree? Get a ladder and carry him down.

Hi

What's white and sticky? A white stick.

What is the difference between muffins and cornbread? I don't enjoy sticking cornbread in my anus.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the oceon? Dead in the water.

Do you know what's fun about having sex with twenty-seven year-olds? There are twenty of them.

Why did Charlie fall? He got shot 24 times in the chest.

A Horse walks into a bar and the barman says 'What with the long face?' and the horse replys 'i'm a f*cking horse.'

As a teen girl was walking through the perfume shop, she picked up one called, "Swirly Paradise." She sprayed it on her and sniffed the sweet scent. Suddenly, the world spun around and she suddenly woke up inside an empty bra. A mouse sniffed her and ate her alive.

whats the hardest part of roller skating. Telling your dad that you are gay.

A: Knock knock. B: Who's there? A: Banana! B: Not you again..(slams door)

What's the difference between a prostitute and a cherry red Ferrari? A cherry red Ferrari isn't in my garage.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, most likely, the chicken escaped from a near by ranch or farm. Upon escaping, he may have simply wandered in the direction of the road, and hence crossed it. Or, with chickens having great curiosity, may have been attracted to something on the other side of the road and felt the urge to explore. Depending on the demographics of the area in which road was in, the chicken had different chances of being hit by an automobile. That's why.

Have you heard of Helen Keller's dog? No. Neither has she

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

Why did Michael Jackson ask a Best Buy clerk for the best 3D TV? He didn't ... He's dead.

Why Did the baby cross the street? He was stapled to the chicken's back

womens sports...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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