What's white and sticky? A white stick.

There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

Why did Charlie fall? He got shot 24 times in the chest.

what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

Susie is 14 & she never listens to her mom, why is that? She's deaf.

What's the difference between an orange? Mooses don't like to wear sweater-vests.

Your momma's so ugly that she was worried that she would never marry anyone.

What happened to the boy who fell off the swing? He got hurt.

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

A nun, a jew, and a KKK member are all stuck together in a lifeboat. A large wave overturns the boat and they all drown.

The meme walks out of the bar.

Women's Rights

Q. Did you hear about the kid napping? A. Yeah, he woke up and was grumpy

What do you call a dead blond in a closet? A homicide victim.

Chikin nuggets

I need somebody to lean on... ...Because one of my legs was amputated after I was blown up on a mine field in afganistan.

Your so ugly That when you look into a mirror it shows an accurate potrail of your unproportionit face

A duck walks into a bar. The bartender-"Hey we don't serve your kind here!" The duck-"What ducks?" The bartender -"No Jewish"

I bought a DVD called "the 18 holes of Tiger Woods". It was a fascinating incite into the golfing technique of arguably one of the greatest sportsmen of all time.

When Chuck Norris does a push up, he pushes himself up.

What do snowmen eat for lunch? Snowmen don't eat, they're inanimate balls of of solid precipitation with rocks for smiles and eyes and carrots for noses.

What cheese is not yours? The one that you didn't buy.

What do you call a boy that fell off a ferry? Extremely unlucky, since one of the other passengers noticed and the captain turned the ferry around, threw him a ladder, and pulled him aboard. Also he died of hepatitis because his mother was too poor to afford condoms, so he was born with it.

Why? Because racecar.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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