There once was an Asian kid who got a B+ in Math. He was later yelled at and beat by his parents.

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How many women are in the world? a little over 3.2 billion because statistics show that there are roughly 51-52% females in the whole population of humans

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Three men are on a plane*. (*Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

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Who is a nazi? • Theo Kingdom

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A kitten walks into a bar and orders a saucer of milk. Everyone enjoys the novelty of his presence.

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Your mom smells so bad that she proceeded to take a shower and then didnt smell bad at all.

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Knock, Knock The door's open

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Knock Knock. Martha, get the door I'm watching the game!

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What's better than winning a Gold Medal in the Special Olympics? Not being handicapped in the first place.

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A man walked into a bar, he then fell to the ground screaming in pain.

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Wanna hear a joke!? Miley Cyrus.

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What did the black man do with the woman's purse? Safely returned it to her

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Pickup Line: Hay girl is that a mirror in your pants. Becuase I can see me in it.

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A rhinoceros walks into a bar. As it felt threatened by the presence of many humans, the rhino attacks and kills several people with the big horn on its nose.

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Why did Benjamin Franklin go to the movies? Dim message, sapi message=InputBox("Find Out","Why did Benjamin Franklin Go To the Movies?") Set sapi=CreateObject("sapi.spvoice") sapi.Speak message

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Obama.

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Why did the aeroplane engine fallon the house? Because of Donnie Darko

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your momma's so stupid she shot herself

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What is colourful and explodes in the air. I don't know but it sounds cool!

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Your momma's so fat... She's on a diet.

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A Woman out of the kitchen

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How do you upset Muslims? Kill their leader. Whoops, already did.

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What's worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm in it? The spelling errors on anti-jokes.com

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What did the phone say to the telephone? I can't connect with you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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