Yo mammas so fat she went on a diet.

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Why was the globe sad? Because it was cut in half.

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How do wake up Lady Gaga You Poker her face

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You walk in to your room. 7 chickens on your bed.

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Your momma's so ugly she adopted you because she had a problem attracting men.

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An old man gets into a van with two little boys. They are his grandsons.

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Two muffins are in an oven. One says "It's getting hot in here". The other one starts to reply but then it's internal organs burst from the heat.

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What is the difference between muffins and cornbread? I don't enjoy sticking cornbread in my anus.

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whats worse than ten dead babies in one trashcan? one dead baby in ten trashcans

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Why did Charlie fall? He got shot 24 times in the chest.

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Roses are red Violets are purple I just got raped by a clown

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What did the penguins get for Christmas? A hang-glider What did the polar bears get for Christmas? Death, The Holocaust, Global Warming, and all of Steven King's books.

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Your momma's so ugly that she was worried that she would never marry anyone.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Animal cruelty

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What's the difference between a prostitute and a cherry red Ferrari? A cherry red Ferrari isn't in my garage.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? A warm meal thanks to a Charity organization.

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What do you a a toilet with fecal matter in it? A toilet.

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What do you call an animal who is purple and feeds on grass? Well his name is Timmy, he is a 6 year old boy and has been diagnosed with a rare deadly disease that turns his skin purple and has removed him so far from reality that he has begin to feed on his front lawn.

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Whats funnier than a anti-joke? 911

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what did the atheist get for Christmas? Nothing. If he was being truly honest to his beliefs, he wouldn't partake in a christian holiday.

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What cheese is not yours? The one that you didn't buy.

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How do you get rid of a boomerang? There are many potential options for getting rid of your boomerang. You can choose to pass it on to somebody as a gift, make a profit through thrift stores or online auctions or perhaps sell it in a newspaper. Alternatively you may wish to simply dispose of it. The average reading speed of an American adult is 300 words per minute. This was exactly 100 words. This means that it took approximately 20 seconds to read it. This means that approximately 4 people died of cancer world wide while you read this.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Around a thousand pounds.

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How do you get a one-armed Polak out of a tree? Get a ladder and carry him down.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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