How do you get a one-armed Polak out of a tree? Get a ladder and carry him down.

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An English man a Scotts man and an Irish man buy a helicopter between them,they go to pick it up after paying for it and realise that non of them can fly it. so they get a refund and go to the pub.

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What is the difference between muffins and cornbread? I don't enjoy sticking cornbread in my anus.

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Why did the chiken cross the road. Anwer: because it was being chased by a crazy horny/ kinky redneck.

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What is Osama Bin Laden's favorite food? I don't know, and to be completely honest I doubt you do either.

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Knock, Knock. Come in.

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What couldn't the stereotypical pirate get into the movie? Well, considering that the stereotypical pirate existed in the sixteenth to eightteenth centuries and the first motion picture wasn't made until the mid to late nineteenth century, also the technology for time travel does not exist nor has it ever, I would have to derive that he was not let in due to the fact that there was no way for him to ever exist at the same time that a movie would have been playing.

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What are corpses favorite form of entertainment? nothing, there dead.

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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what did jesus say to moses? jesus isn't real

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whats the hardest part of roller skating. Telling your dad that you are gay.

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What did the orphan say to the other orphan? Annie is my favorite movie.

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What did the penguins get for Christmas? A hang-glider What did the polar bears get for Christmas? Death, The Holocaust, Global Warming, and all of Steven King's books.

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Q: What do you call an aligator in a vest A: Investigator

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Why was the boy sad? I don't know, ask him.

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What's the difference between an orange? Mooses don't like to wear sweater-vests.

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Your momma's so ugly that she was worried that she would never marry anyone.

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What happens when some one breaks apart your little brother's lego tower? You have a screaming little brother and a bunch of legos all over the floor.

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Wat do you do when you see aomeone bleeding on the ground? Walk away and act like nothing happened

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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What did the boy do when he was cold? He got a blanket.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? He said, "Where's my tractor?"

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The meme walks out of the bar.

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Yo mama is so fat that her dietician often recommends that she decrease her calorie intake and exercise more often to avoid risk of diabetes or potentially a stroke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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