Sonic

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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An English man a Scotts man and an Irish man buy a helicopter between them,they go to pick it up after paying for it and realise that non of them can fly it. so they get a refund and go to the pub.

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What couldn't the stereotypical pirate get into the movie? Well, considering that the stereotypical pirate existed in the sixteenth to eightteenth centuries and the first motion picture wasn't made until the mid to late nineteenth century, also the technology for time travel does not exist nor has it ever, I would have to derive that he was not let in due to the fact that there was no way for him to ever exist at the same time that a movie would have been playing.

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Roses are red Violets are purple I just got raped by a clown

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these jokes are terrible, even for anti-jokes

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whats the hardest part of roller skating. Telling your dad that you are gay.

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Q: What do you call an aligator in a vest A: Investigator

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What's the difference between an orange? Mooses don't like to wear sweater-vests.

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What happens when some one breaks apart your little brother's lego tower? You have a screaming little brother and a bunch of legos all over the floor.

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Wat do you do when you see aomeone bleeding on the ground? Walk away and act like nothing happened

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What's 6 inches long, held in your hand, and has a round tip? A pencil you pervert.

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What's pink and smells like chicken? A pink hair band, I was lying about the chicken part.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? A warm meal thanks to a Charity organization.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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What's green and has 4 wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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Why did the window break? I threw a pig out it.

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1134

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Me: Knock Knock! You: Door's Open!

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roses are grey, violets are grey, i'm colourblind and shit at poetry

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing set? She had no arms.

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What do you get when you cross a rhino and an elephant? Two angry pachyderms.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman immediately calls the local stable to report the missing stallion, and his owner promptly arrives to take him home. He thanks the landlord and offers a small reward, but it is respectfully declined.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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