What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Hey, where'd my tractor go?

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Oh look, I've found my knife

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Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Leukemia

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Your mother is so fat.... I am happy to see her join our exercise group.

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these jokes are terrible, even for anti-jokes

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? -I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

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whats annoying and black? black people

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Q: What's the difference between an African American and a bench? A: An African American is a human being of black dissent, while a bench is an inanimate object that people sit on.

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What is the difference between a botlle of sun lotion and a Mexican? A bottle of sun lotion contains a lotion that protects your skin against the sun, and a Mexican is a person from Mexico.

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Bobby got a new bike there are black kids in bobby's neighborhood bobby doesnt have a new bike anymore

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Knock, knock. Who's there? John. Oh, hey! Come in.

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What do birds need when they're sick? Medical attention

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? - "Robin, get in the Batmobile"

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Why was the girl blind, and deaf? it was hellen keller

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Your landlord. I'm here to collect rent

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Why did the blonde kid lose the spelling bee? Because she misspelled a word.

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What do you call an animal who is purple and feeds on grass? Well his name is Timmy, he is a 6 year old boy and has been diagnosed with a rare deadly disease that turns his skin purple and has removed him so far from reality that he has begin to feed on his front lawn.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape the overwhelming feeling of self doubt created by an abusive drug addicted father which has left him seeking life threatening situations that should never befall a simple chicken.

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What does chuck norris do at 4 o clock in the morning ? Sleep

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Why was the boy sad? His friend stabbed him with a fork. Also, his mother died. Also, his dad raped him Also, he has a chode. And it really sucks when you have a chode.

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How could they tell Michael Jackson was dead? He showed no vital signs.

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What did the deaf Jewish Rabbi say to the Italian Priest. What?

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What did the FBI agent say to the CIA agent. We're both agents

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well it rained all night the day i left, the weather it was dry, i can't remember the words but susana don't you cry oh susana don't you cry for me for i come from alabama with a banjo on my knee oh

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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