Whats worse than contracting H.I.V.? nothing

My wife's star sign was cancer and it's quite ironic how she died really... She was attacked by a giant crab.

What did the black man do with the woman's purse? Safely returned it to her

Why was the Jewish man put to death? Because he was convicted by a jury of his peers in a fair trial overseen by a judge in good standing in a United States court for 12 counts of homicide

Ice cream You scream We all scream Because there is a murderer killing our friends

How could they tell Michael Jackson was dead? He showed no vital signs.

Q: What is a African man with funny clothing and children straddling onto his back for dear life/ screaming in fear who only a few minutes ago before a particular incident made several young children cry and being chased by an authority figure? A: An intentionally inane circus performer partcipating in a scintillating rendition alongside his two children of who inadvertently frightened a small group of youth before he immediately decided to proceed by, during one of his extremely long, albeit few breaks, taking the members of his family on an interesting excursion to the nearby amusement park for occassional thrills. On the initial journey there, the black man, out of haste, accidentally dropped one of his children's most valuable toys of which elicited undeniably obnoxious bouts of sadness to come bursting out of his children's respective chests and an increased rate-of-travel for his wife of who accopanied him on his adventure and desired to assist him in his panic. In the spin of events, the man experienced an instance of hyper-activedness and spun out of control for a minute before eventually cooling down. Hence the screaming.

Why did the chicken cross the road? know on knows as he can't talk

well it rained all night the day i left, the weather it was dry, i can't remember the words but susana don't you cry oh susana don't you cry for me for i come from alabama with a banjo on my knee oh

Knock Knock Who's there? me oh

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Someone else's cheese.

A Asian man with a boner runs and hits the wall... He beaks his nose.

A person was born on may 5th 1955 and one day noticed that they had $555.55 in their bank account. The person went to a race and betted all their money on the 5th runner in the 5th race. What happened? The runner came in 5th place.

Knock knock! Whos there? Me. Now open the door.

Q:What are black basketball players good at? A:Running,shooting and stealing.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the oceon? Dead in the water.

Why did the man not get home to his loving family? He blew up.

Oh look, I've found my knife

What did the republican say to the democrat? You suck!

Q: What's the difference between an African American and a bench? A: An African American is a human being of black dissent, while a bench is an inanimate object that people sit on.

Three nuns walk into a bar. They realize they are in a place they don't want to be, so they leave, casting furtive glances around, fearing that someone from their congregation will see them and think they went in to drink.

What do you call a black guy eating fried chicken? His name.

Q: What do a dildo salesman and a car salesman have in common? A: They are both salesman

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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