Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Ham and Cheese!

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Q: what do you call a person who's ass is dumb A: a dumbass

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What is green and would kill you if it fell out of a tree and onto your head? A pool table.

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Want to hear a joke? Me to...

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There is a running race, both black and white people are running in this race! Half way through there is an avalanche and every black person running was killed! Who won the race??? Society... :D

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What's worse than women's rights? Actually, not much, because women throughout history suffered for too long the hardships of over dominant male figures and deserve the freedoms they have achieved today.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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make me a sandwich!

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What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a Cheetah? A yellow Chuck Norris with black spots.

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What kind of animal eats and pisses on everything? Your mother. -Avery Vartanian

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What did the woman say to her husband after he came home from a late night of drinking? Nothing, because the last time she did, she got her ass beat.

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Why did the Calculus teacher give an Asian student an F on a test? Because he got less than 60% of the answers correct.

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What did St. Mary Magdalene tell Pontius Pilate during the crucifixion of Christ? All this chaos is making me CROSS-eyed!

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The NBA lockout

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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What's blue and orange at the bottom of a swimming pool? A dead baby, why's it there? I popped the arm bands.

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88

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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What's a bit smaller than the tallest man in the world? The 2nd tallest man in the world.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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What kind of cheese is not you cheese? Not your cheese.

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what did luke say to darth vader? Can i borrow ur car please.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scottishman walk into a gay bar. And why shoudn't they.

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How could they tell Michael Jackson was dead? He showed no vital signs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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