You walk in to your room. 7 chickens on your bed.

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A barrel of monkeys is only a barrel of laughs if they're alive and telling jokes.

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A bear walks into a bar. The building is evacuated swiftly but several people are killed

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Have Alzheimers, Cheese on Toast.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your a Jew, I don't like you.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Awkward silence Awkward silence who? ...

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What did the nurse say to the doctor? Boo-hoo, i was pranked over the phone, i'm gonna kill myself now.

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What's the difference between a prostitute and a cherry red Ferrari? A cherry red Ferrari isn't in my garage.

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A wolf boards a plane with two dead rabbits in his mouth. The flight attendant approaches him and says, "Sir, you can only have one of those on the plane." The wolf bites her throat out.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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Why do Jewish people like money so much? Because they can exchange it for goods and services

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a Cadillac? A Cadillac is a car, and a dead baby is a morose and disgusting topic of internet humor.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Cheese.

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Why didn't Betty ride her bike to school? She had no legs.

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Q:How many doorknobs should you throw at a police man? A:None you should have upmost respect for the law.

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What do you call an animal who is purple and feeds on grass? Well his name is Timmy, he is a 6 year old boy and has been diagnosed with a rare deadly disease that turns his skin purple and has removed him so far from reality that he has begin to feed on his front lawn.

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I need somebody to lean on... ...Because one of my legs was amputated after I was blown up on a mine field in afganistan.

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what was the dinosaur after it got out of the pool? wet

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Your mother is so dumb. It's a good thing she knows sign language.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing set? She had no arms.

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Whats 9+10? 19

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How do you fit 100 ethiopians in a phone box? With great difficulty.

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What cheese is not yours? The one that you didn't buy.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Were your parents drunk when they named you?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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