What do you call an animal who is purple and feeds on grass? Well his name is Timmy, he is a 6 year old boy and has been diagnosed with a rare deadly disease that turns his skin purple and has removed him so far from reality that he has begin to feed on his front lawn.

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a Jew had a small nose

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What's a bit smaller than the tallest man in the world? The 2nd tallest man in the world.

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What did the man say to the attractive female bartender as he left the bar? Well, it's been fun but I hate you so I'm leaving to kill your entire family.

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Knock, knock! “Who's there?” “The Gestapo.”

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Why did the blonde kid lose the spelling bee? Because she misspelled a word.

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It's easy to take part, just type your text below!

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A blind man walks into a bar and a table and a lady....

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Whats orange and has stripes? - a tiger

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There was a Mexican in a bomb shop ?

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If thin people skinny dip, what do fat people do? Sink

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A dog walks into a bar, looks at the bartender, lifts its leg and pisses on a bar stool. What does the bartender do ? He chases the dog out the bar and gets a mop to mop up the piss.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? A n a l

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Cancer victim: What kind of doctor are you? Person 2: I'm not a doctor. In fact, I'm a suicide bomber and am planning to initiate the detonation sequence right now. Cancer victim: Well, it doesn't really matter. No matter who shows up, I'll still die anyways. This way, I'll be able to pay a visit to the transcendent city high in the heavens sooner. Person 2: I bet that many would mourn your death at your remembrance ceremony. Cancer victim: That doesn't bother me. My friends and family are close to my heart, but that doesn't warrant eternal proximity with one another in itself. Person 2: Let's go to a better place. Let us finally break free of our mortal chains that have unceasingly been hindering our progress since the first war took place. Cancer victim: Wait, I've changed my mind! Person 2: Too late. I wish I had a time machine... not.

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Q: Why MohammadReza Is a Bitch? A: Because he isnt a whore

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my bubbles!

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What do you call a man who leaves his wife and kids to be with another woman? A dick.

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Why did the chiken cross the road. Anwer: because it was being chased by a crazy horny/ kinky redneck.

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What did the orphan say to the other orphan? Annie is my favorite movie.

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how many babies does it take to paint a wall red? depends on how hard you throw em

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what is brown with wheels? a potatoe, i was just kidding about the wheels

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What can be any colour and is made of leather? Cars. I lied about the leather part.

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Q: What do you call a bathtub? A: A bathtub

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What's red and spins real fast? Not a dead baby in a blender, babies can't fit in there. Unless of course you dismember them. but that's obsurd. . . Kinda

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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