What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being cut in half by a human while you were trying to eat an apple

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? - "Robin, get in the Batmobile"

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Chuck Norris was walking down the street when he was confronted by an armed, very desperate street robber. Chuck unfortunately made the decision to defend himself, and was shot in the gut before he could complete a roundhouse kick. The robber then took his wallet and ran off, undoubtedly to buy drugs.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why was the girl blind, and deaf? it was hellen keller

thumb_up thumb_down +27

hey, can you answer a question for me? yeah, sure. ThankYou!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why didn't little jimmy get anything for Christmas? He is Jewish.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

88

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's green and invisible? This cabbage.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

what did micheal jackson give to a young boy? -nothing micheal jackson is dead

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What call a black man flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Did you hear about the kid napping? They found his body in a ditch.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape the overwhelming feeling of self doubt created by an abusive drug addicted father which has left him seeking life threatening situations that should never befall a simple chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Did you see the picture of Helen Keller's father? No. Lemme Google it. Oh cool; he had a beard.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

When life throws you lemons, duck because they freakin' hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's cheese that's not yours? Mine.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why shouldnt you throw rocks at a black kid on a bike? Because the kid wasn't riding in your way, you could get arrested for assault and battery, and he probably lives in a low income area and cant afford health insurance if he was injured.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How many black people does it take to screw in a lightbulb?. I dont know either it was dark.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Your momma's so fat... She's on a diet.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

whats worse than getting beaten up by a bully? realizing your fly was down the whole time and getting beaten up by a bully

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why did the girl fall off the couch? She had a seizure.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What did one man say to the other? I'm a Mormon.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Q: What do you call a bathtub? A: A bathtub

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops