What runs faster than a nigger with a stolen tv? His brother with the remote

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There once was an Asian kid who got a B+ in Math. He was later yelled at and beat by his parents.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I have a gun BANG!

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Why did the golfer take an extra pair of pants to the golf course? In case they ripped and he needed a replacement.

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How many days did abraham lincoln take a crap for? Turquoise because pancakes cannot fly without wings during the summer unless giraffes smell pineapple on tuesday.

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Why did the man not get home to his loving family? He blew up.

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Where do farmers retire their used farm equipment? The tree in their backyard.

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A Woman out of the kitchen

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What's red and spins real fast? Not a dead baby in a blender, babies can't fit in there. Unless of course you dismember them. but that's obsurd. . . Kinda

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Your momma's so ugly that she was worried that she would never marry anyone.

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What is the difference between a botlle of sun lotion and a Mexican? A bottle of sun lotion contains a lotion that protects your skin against the sun, and a Mexican is a person from Mexico.

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Did you hear about the kidnapping yesterday? He slept for at least 3 hours.

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Jon has 40 chololate bars, he eats 32, what does he have now? Diabetes.

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WOMENS RIGHTS

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What did the boy who succsesfully came out of liposection get? Diobeeties.

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being cut in half by a human while you were trying to eat an apple

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what's the difference between a duck? one leg is the same.

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What did the furnace say to the Jew? Nothing, as it is an inanimate object and cannot communicate.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Were your parents drunk when they named you?

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Why did the man with brain cancer die? He drove his Segway off a cliff.

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How could they tell Michael Jackson was dead? He showed no vital signs.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? A n a l

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A cow walks into a bar and says, "moo."

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here kitty kitty

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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