How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face (pokerface)

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What did the dog say to the cat? I have no idea. I wasn't there.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman immediately calls the local stable to report the missing stallion, and his owner promptly arrives to take him home. He thanks the landlord and offers a small reward, but it is respectfully declined.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape the overwhelming feeling of self doubt created by an abusive drug addicted father which has left him seeking life threatening situations that should never befall a simple chicken.

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How could they tell Michael Jackson was dead? He showed no vital signs.

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Why was the old lady hard of hearing? She spent many of her young days blasting hard rock from her speakers/

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(Man #1): Do you know how I know you're gay? (Man #2): How? (Man #1) When I kiss you, you kiss me back...

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Your Mama is so old, that she is probrably going to die pretty soon.

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Hey guess what an antijoke is. What? a joke Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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Why did the kitten die? Because your mom is gay.

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Roses are red, violets are blue That's a fact.

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What made parashoot paint's so uncool? MC Hammer.

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What is green and would kill you if it fell out of a tree and onto your head? A pool table.

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How many black people does it take to screw in a lightbulb?. I dont know either it was dark.

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My dog has no nose." "How does it smell?" "Potato"

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Your mother is so fat.... I am happy to see her join our exercise group.

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What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a Cheetah? A yellow Chuck Norris with black spots.

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what's the difference between natives and dogs? people enjoy having dogs in their houses

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A blind man walks into a bar Backs up, and walks around it.

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What happens when you throw a cricket bat at a blonde? She is hurt and reports you to the police for anti-social behaviour.

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What do you call a black man on the side of the road? -A black man who needs a ride.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? - "Robin, get in the Batmobile"

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A man walked into a bar, he then fell to the ground screaming in pain.

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what do giraffes have that other animals don't have? -baby giraffes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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