If you're American when you go into the bathroom, and American when you come out, what are you inside? American! What are you, a communist?

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A Man goes into a watch store. Why? To buy a watch

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What do you call an Arab flying a plane? A pilot. *BOOM* Never mind, he was a terrorist.

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What do you call a man who leaves his wife and kids to be with another woman? A dick.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Ham and Cheese!

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what is brown with wheels? a potatoe, i was just kidding about the wheels

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How much stuff would a stuff muff huff if a stuff muff could huff stuff? Whole dang lotsa

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someone called a frog a frog

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What did the woman say to her husband after he came home from a late night of drinking? Nothing, because the last time she did, she got her ass beat.

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What did the doctor say to the Lawyer? I get paid more

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The NBA lockout

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being cut in half by a human while you were trying to eat an apple

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What do you call a pig with no arms? A pig, pigs don't have arms

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What's blue and orange at the bottom of a swimming pool? A dead baby, why's it there? I popped the arm bands.

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Why didn't little jimmy get anything for Christmas? He is Jewish.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face (pokerface)

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What jew get for christmas? Your money.

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Where do you find your quadriplegic dog? Right where you left it.

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what did luke say to darth vader? Can i borrow ur car please.

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Q: What did my uncle Tom say when he first encountered my friend Richard Jefferson? A: Hello

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape the overwhelming feeling of self doubt created by an abusive drug addicted father which has left him seeking life threatening situations that should never befall a simple chicken.

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A man walks around a bar.

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What's brown and smells Iike crap? My brother he doesn't shower and is Hispanic

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What did Justin Bieber get for Christmas? An iPod Touch and a few nice sweaters.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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