What's 6 inches long, held in your hand, and has a round tip? A pencil you pervert.

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Women's rights.

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America Votes

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Knock, knock. Who's there? John. Oh, hey! Come in.

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What does a mama bear on the pill have in common with the world series? No Cubs!

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Your landlord. I'm here to collect rent

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what's the difference between a duck? one leg is the same.

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint

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What did the black man do with the woman's purse? Safely returned it to her

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What's a pirate's favorite letter of the alphabet? Aye, ye be thinkin' it to be "ARRRR" - but it be the C

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A black, a muslim, and a communist walk into a bar, the bartender says "what will it be Mr. President?

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What do you call an animal who is purple and feeds on grass? Well his name is Timmy, he is a 6 year old boy and has been diagnosed with a rare deadly disease that turns his skin purple and has removed him so far from reality that he has begin to feed on his front lawn.

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Q. What's silver and cries? A. Someone who's been stabbed while wearing a suit of armour.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape the overwhelming feeling of self doubt created by an abusive drug addicted father which has left him seeking life threatening situations that should never befall a simple chicken.

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

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Whats worse than the holocaust? A n a l

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Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Were your parents drunk when they named you?

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A cow walks into a bar and says, "moo."

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Knock Knock Who's There? Boo Boo Who? Boo Smith, I'm the town rapist.

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Why did i write this joke knowing i wont get published? I don't know.

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Hey, where'd my tractor go?

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Roses are red, violets are blue That's a fact.

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A man walked into a bar. What did he say? Ouch.

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Your mother is so fat.... I am happy to see her join our exercise group.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops