What did the homeless man get for Christmas? A warm meal thanks to a Charity organization.

What did the boy do when he was cold? He got a blanket.

Why Did the baby cross the street? He was stapled to the chicken's back

Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

lebron

Jon has 40 chololate bars, he eats 32, what does he have now? Diabetes.

Knock knock. Who's there? Your neighbor.

Q: Why did the bully hit the kid A:Because he is a bully-I thought that would have been self explanitory.

What do you call a boy that fell off a ferry? Extremely unlucky, since one of the other passengers noticed and the captain turned the ferry around, threw him a ladder, and pulled him aboard. Also he died of hepatitis because his mother was too poor to afford condoms, so he was born with it.

How do you get rid of a boomerang? There are many potential options for getting rid of your boomerang. You can choose to pass it on to somebody as a gift, make a profit through thrift stores or online auctions or perhaps sell it in a newspaper. Alternatively you may wish to simply dispose of it. The average reading speed of an American adult is 300 words per minute. This was exactly 100 words. This means that it took approximately 20 seconds to read it. This means that approximately 4 people died of cancer world wide while you read this.

A cow walks into a bar and says, "moo."

how to u kill a baby with no arms, throw it in a pool

How do you get a one-armed Polak out of a tree? Get a ladder and carry him down.

A man walks into a bar. "Ouch!" he shouted after he stubbed his toe on a table.

Why was timmy crying? He gave his grandmother AIDs...

9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because my first shot missed.

An English man a Scotts man and an Irish man buy a helicopter between them,they go to pick it up after paying for it and realise that non of them can fly it. so they get a refund and go to the pub.

What is the difference between muffins and cornbread? I don't enjoy sticking cornbread in my anus.

acuna

Your momma's so fat... She's on a diet.

whats the hardest part of roller skating. Telling your dad that you are gay.

A black guy, a Mexican guy and a Jew walk into a hospital. They are all undergoing the same chemotherapy treatment.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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