What did the phone say to the telephone? I can't connect with you.

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A priest and a bunch of boys are in a room. They are having choir practice.

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Your mom smells so bad that she proceeded to take a shower and then didnt smell bad at all.

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Your so ugly That when you look into a mirror it shows an accurate potrail of your unproportionit face

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What did the small baby faucet say to the daddy faucet? Nothing, they are inanimate objects and cannot talk.

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Know what's funny? Jokes.

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What is green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

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Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says its getting hot in here the other muffin say holy shit a talking muffin.

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What do you call a boy that fell off a ferry? Extremely unlucky, since one of the other passengers noticed and the captain turned the ferry around, threw him a ladder, and pulled him aboard. Also he died of hepatitis because his mother was too poor to afford condoms, so he was born with it.

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What cheese is not yours? The one that you didn't buy.

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Why? Because racecar.

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A man walks into a bar said man is escorted out of said bar said man may have died from a serious case of alcohol poisoning whilst in said bar he was escorted as dead people have trouble moving of their own accord experts discovered later that the man had actually been brutaly beaten by another man wielding a bar stool this shows that experts are not very smart

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Yo mama so stupid she liked this joke

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i'm a loser with body odor.. plus i play pokemon to pass the time because reality is just to horrible to face. guess who? josh wood.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? know on knows as he can't talk

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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It's raining, it's pouring The old man is snoring He went to bed, he bumped his head Got a brain hemorrhage and died in his sleep.

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To be honest that sounds like more of a mental health issue and not something I'm qualified to deal with as a GP. Let me refer you.

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You walk in to your room. 7 chickens on your bed.

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Why did the boy cry? Because he was mercilessly beaten by his mother.

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Knock Knock Who's There? I am. I am who? I think someone has contracted amnesia.

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What made parashoot paint's so uncool? MC Hammer.

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What's my name? I don't know u tell me.

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Roses are red violets are blue ... Aww I just don't give a damn and nether do you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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