what is brown with wheels? a potatoe, i was just kidding about the wheels

How much stuff would a stuff muff huff if a stuff muff could huff stuff? Whole dang lotsa

Which came first the egg or the chicken? The chicken because eggs can't cross the road

someone called a frog a frog

What did the woman say to her husband after he came home from a late night of drinking? Nothing, because the last time she did, she got her ass beat.

What did the doctor say to the Lawyer? I get paid more

The NBA lockout

What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being cut in half by a human while you were trying to eat an apple

Why didn't little jimmy get anything for Christmas? He is Jewish.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face (pokerface)

what did luke say to darth vader? Can i borrow ur car please.

Q: What did my uncle Tom say when he first encountered my friend Richard Jefferson? A: Hello

Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape the overwhelming feeling of self doubt created by an abusive drug addicted father which has left him seeking life threatening situations that should never befall a simple chicken.

A man walks around a bar.

What's brown and smells Iike crap? My brother he doesn't shower and is Hispanic

Did you hear about the kid napping? They found his body in a ditch.

What did Justin Bieber get for Christmas? An iPod Touch and a few nice sweaters.

Knock Knock Who's There? Boo Boo Who? Boo Smith, I'm the town rapist.

Cancer victim: What kind of doctor are you? Person 2: I'm not a doctor. In fact, I'm a suicide bomber and am planning to initiate the detonation sequence right now. Cancer victim: Well, it doesn't really matter. No matter who shows up, I'll still die anyways. This way, I'll be able to pay a visit to the transcendent city high in the heavens sooner. Person 2: I bet that many would mourn your death at your remembrance ceremony. Cancer victim: That doesn't bother me. My friends and family are close to my heart, but that doesn't warrant eternal proximity with one another in itself. Person 2: Let's go to a better place. Let us finally break free of our mortal chains that have unceasingly been hindering our progress since the first war took place. Cancer victim: Wait, I've changed my mind! Person 2: Too late. I wish I had a time machine... not.

What runs faster than a nigger with a stolen tv? His brother with the remote

Q: why are kittens so cute? A: because god created them that way. go fourth and enjoy kittens.

"Ask me if I'm a billboard" "Are you a billboard?" "No"

Hey Tim lets think of a joke

A person was born on may 5th 1955 and one day noticed that they had $555.55 in their bank account. The person went to a race and betted all their money on the 5th runner in the 5th race. What happened? The runner came in 5th place.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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