Susie is 14 & she never listens to her mom, why is that? She's deaf.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Roses are red Violets are purple I just got raped by a clown

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the penguins get for Christmas? A hang-glider What did the polar bears get for Christmas? Death, The Holocaust, Global Warming, and all of Steven King's books.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Animal cruelty

thumb_up thumb_down -74

What's the difference between a prostitute and a cherry red Ferrari? A cherry red Ferrari isn't in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +93

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? A warm meal thanks to a Charity organization.

thumb_up thumb_down +71

What do you a a toilet with fecal matter in it? A toilet.

thumb_up thumb_down +65

The meme walks out of the bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

Chikin nuggets

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What do you call an animal who is purple and feeds on grass? Well his name is Timmy, he is a 6 year old boy and has been diagnosed with a rare deadly disease that turns his skin purple and has removed him so far from reality that he has begin to feed on his front lawn.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Whats funnier than a anti-joke? 911

thumb_up thumb_down +19

what did the atheist get for Christmas? Nothing. If he was being truly honest to his beliefs, he wouldn't partake in a christian holiday.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What cheese is not yours? The one that you didn't buy.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How do you get rid of a boomerang? There are many potential options for getting rid of your boomerang. You can choose to pass it on to somebody as a gift, make a profit through thrift stores or online auctions or perhaps sell it in a newspaper. Alternatively you may wish to simply dispose of it. The average reading speed of an American adult is 300 words per minute. This was exactly 100 words. This means that it took approximately 20 seconds to read it. This means that approximately 4 people died of cancer world wide while you read this.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How do you get a one-armed Polak out of a tree? Get a ladder and carry him down.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

i'm a loser with body odor.. plus i play pokemon to pass the time because reality is just to horrible to face. guess who? josh wood.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock Knock Who's There? Boo Boo Who? Boo Smith, I'm the town rapist.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

69.9

thumb_up thumb_down -1

why does king kong so fat? because he eats to much

thumb_up thumb_down -3

An old man gets into a van with two little boys. They are his grandsons.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Two muffins are in an oven. One says "It's getting hot in here". The other one starts to reply but then it's internal organs burst from the heat.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Do you know what's fun about having sex with twenty-seven year-olds? There are twenty of them.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Roses are red violets are blue ... Aww I just don't give a damn and nether do you.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops