What goes in long and hard and comes out wet and sticky? A penis after orgasmic intercourse.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Oh look, I've found my knife

thumb_up thumb_down -19

your momma's so stupid she shot herself

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did one man say to the other? I'm a Mormon.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Hey, is that your corvette. No I thought it was yours.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Q: What do you call a bathtub? A: A bathtub

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Why did the baby cross the road? cause it was stapled to the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -135

What couldn't the Asian drive? Because he had just gotten laser eye surgery, and the doctor recommended that he didn't drive for a few days.

thumb_up thumb_down +138

Why didn't Tommy walk to school? 'Cause he was in a wheelchair..

thumb_up thumb_down +66

Why did the girl say 'baa'? Because she was a lamb.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What did the black man do with the woman's purse? Safely returned it to her

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's more stinky than a fart? More farts.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Were your parents drunk when they named you?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

FIRE!!

thumb_up thumb_down

well it rained all night the day i left, the weather it was dry, i can't remember the words but susana don't you cry oh susana don't you cry for me for i come from alabama with a banjo on my knee oh

thumb_up thumb_down

You walk in to your room. 7 chickens on your bed.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What is the difference between a dead baby and a bowling ball? You can't pick up a bowling ball with a pitchfork.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A Asian man with a boner runs and hits the wall... He beaks his nose.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q:What colors make black? A:Nothing Thats a Shade

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A blind man walks into a bar and a table and a lady....

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the oceon? Dead in the water.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Do you know what's fun about having sex with twenty-seven year-olds? There are twenty of them.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's the most stupid thing you have ever heard? Woman's Studies.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops