Why'd the cat have one eye? It got kicked by a goat.

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Q. Did you hear about the kid napping? A. Yeah, he woke up and was grumpy

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Pizza? A Jew is a person either born into or converted to Judaism, and a Pizza is a disc shaped, oven baked bread typically topped with tomato sauce and cheese.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? - "Robin, get in the Batmobile"

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Why Did the baby cross the street? He was stapled to the chicken's back

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What's worse than one bee sting? 2 bee stings

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roses are grey, violets are grey, i'm colourblind and shit at poetry

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Wumbo

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John had 32 candy bars. He ate 28 of them. What does John have now? daibetes, john has diabetes.

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Once there was two fish in a tank, and one said "how do you drive this thing?".

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Why are atheists stupid? Actually, statistically, they are more intelligent than believers.

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why does king kong so fat? because he eats to much

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Yo mammas so fat she went on a diet.

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How do wake up Lady Gaga You Poker her face

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Why was the globe sad? Because it was cut in half.

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What's white and sticky? A white stick.

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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What's the difference between an orange? Mooses don't like to wear sweater-vests.

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What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a Cheetah? A yellow Chuck Norris with black spots.

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What did the girl get for her birthday? Nothing...cause she died

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Cheese.

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Q:How many doorknobs should you throw at a police man? A:None you should have upmost respect for the law.

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womens sports...

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I need somebody to lean on... ...Because one of my legs was amputated after I was blown up on a mine field in afganistan.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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