What's funnier than House? Family Guy.

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What did the penguins get for Christmas? A hang-glider What did the polar bears get for Christmas? Death, The Holocaust, Global Warming, and all of Steven King's books.

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If Barbie is so popular...why do you have to buy her friends?

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What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Repeatedly raped by her alcoholic, child molesting father.

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Your momma's so ugly that she was worried that she would never marry anyone.

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My Roomate-(crying in the fetal position for the love of his life has been murderer) Me- (laughing) I have a problem

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What happened to the boy who fell off the swing? He got hurt.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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A priest and a bunch of boys are in a room. They are having choir practice.

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Why'd the cat have one eye? It got kicked by a goat.

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I need somebody to lean on... ...Because one of my legs was amputated after I was blown up on a mine field in afganistan.

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What is worse than finding a dead mouse in your loaf of bread? A lot of things since you were able to sue the bread company for tens of thousands of dollars.

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How do you fit 100 ethiopians in a phone box? With great difficulty.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face (pokerface)

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What cheese is not yours? The one that you didn't buy.

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How do you get a one-armed Polak out of a tree? Get a ladder and carry him down.

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What's green and has wheels? A cucumber with wheels.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Hi

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What's white and sticky? A white stick.

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What is the difference between muffins and cornbread? I don't enjoy sticking cornbread in my anus.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the oceon? Dead in the water.

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Do you know what's fun about having sex with twenty-seven year-olds? There are twenty of them.

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A Horse walks into a bar and the barman says 'What with the long face?' and the horse replys 'i'm a f*cking horse.'

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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