An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scottishman walk into a gay bar. And why shoudn't they.

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Q: What is a African man with funny clothing and children straddling onto his back for dear life/ screaming in fear who only a few minutes ago before a particular incident made several young children cry and being chased by an authority figure? A: An intentionally inane circus performer partcipating in a scintillating rendition alongside his two children of who inadvertently frightened a small group of youth before he immediately decided to proceed by, during one of his extremely long, albeit few breaks, taking the members of his family on an interesting excursion to the nearby amusement park for occassional thrills. On the initial journey there, the black man, out of haste, accidentally dropped one of his children's most valuable toys of which elicited undeniably obnoxious bouts of sadness to come bursting out of his children's respective chests and an increased rate-of-travel for his wife of who accopanied him on his adventure and desired to assist him in his panic. In the spin of events, the man experienced an instance of hyper-activedness and spun out of control for a minute before eventually cooling down. Hence the screaming.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was forced to against his will by a group of marauding ninjas who happened to be strolling by at the time.

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What did the tree say to himself? Gee-oma-tree( get it geometry say it outloud)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? know on knows as he can't talk

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There was a Mexican in a bomb shop ?

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FIRE!!

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well it rained all night the day i left, the weather it was dry, i can't remember the words but susana don't you cry oh susana don't you cry for me for i come from alabama with a banjo on my knee oh

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Knock knock! Whos there? Me. Now open the door.

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What do you call a guy with newmonya? Not good at spelling

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Knock, Knock Who is there? Yo Yo who? *the man ran away and was never seen again, because he had nowhere to stay*

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whats the hardest part of roller skating. Telling your dad that you are gay.

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Q: How did that man get two black eyes? A: He was born!

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Hey, is that your corvette. No I thought it was yours.

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The big problem with politicians is they're always lying but fortunately there's always a moment when it's not a problem anymore. When they do it down in their tombs.

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Roses are der, Violets are lube, I am dyslexic.

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Why didn't Tommy walk to school? 'Cause he was in a wheelchair..

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Three nuns walk into a bar. They realize they are in a place they don't want to be, so they leave, casting furtive glances around, fearing that someone from their congregation will see them and think they went in to drink.

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What do you call a black guy eating fried chicken? His name.

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot

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What did the furnace say to the Jew? Nothing, as it is an inanimate object and cannot communicate.

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whats silver and cries? a coin, although it can't cry because its a coin. So it's just silver

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My wife's star sign was cancer and it's quite ironic how she died really... She was attacked by a giant crab.

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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