What do you call a deer with no eyes? Animal cruelty

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Good to see you today!

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Why did the blond fall of the ladder? She had no arms.

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A priest and a bunch of boys are in a room. They are having choir practice.

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What do you a a toilet with fecal matter in it? A toilet.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Pizza? A Jew is a person either born into or converted to Judaism, and a Pizza is a disc shaped, oven baked bread typically topped with tomato sauce and cheese.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman immediately calls the local stable to report the missing stallion, and his owner promptly arrives to take him home. He thanks the landlord and offers a small reward, but it is respectfully declined.

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Know what's funny? Jokes.

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John had 32 candy bars. He ate 28 of them. What does John have now? daibetes, john has diabetes.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face (pokerface)

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How do you get rid of a boomerang? There are many potential options for getting rid of your boomerang. You can choose to pass it on to somebody as a gift, make a profit through thrift stores or online auctions or perhaps sell it in a newspaper. Alternatively you may wish to simply dispose of it. The average reading speed of an American adult is 300 words per minute. This was exactly 100 words. This means that it took approximately 20 seconds to read it. This means that approximately 4 people died of cancer world wide while you read this.

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What's green and has wheels? A cucumber with wheels.

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How do you get a one-armed Polak out of a tree? Get a ladder and carry him down.

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What would George Washington do if he was alive today? Scream and scrach at the top of his coffin.

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Why was the globe sad? Because it was cut in half.

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whats white and smells like black paint? nothing, white paint even though it is still paint has a slightly different smell due to the difference in dye colors used to make it

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what's funnier than 1 Mecican? 2 Mexicans

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A man walked into a bar. What did he say? Ouch.

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Do you know what's fun about having sex with twenty-seven year-olds? There are twenty of them.

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What did the young girl get for Christmas? Violently raped and murdered by her abusive father.

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What is colourful and explodes in the air. I don't know but it sounds cool!

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There was a Priest, a Rabbi, and a Gay Man on a plane. The plane was going down. The Priest said "amen". The Rabbi said "amein". The Gay Man put his penis in the rabbi's asshole.

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My Roomate-(crying in the fetal position for the love of his life has been murderer) Me- (laughing) I have a problem

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What's the difference between a prostitute and a cherry red Ferrari? A cherry red Ferrari isn't in my garage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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