Q: Why did the bully hit the kid A:Because he is a bully-I thought that would have been self explanitory.

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Once there was two fish in a tank, and one said "how do you drive this thing?".

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What do you call a black person who drives a plane? A pilot.

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whats red and smells like blue paint? Hank Kovalcik

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Someone else's cheese.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape the overwhelming feeling of self doubt created by an abusive drug addicted father which has left him seeking life threatening situations that should never befall a simple chicken.

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Cancer victim: What kind of doctor are you? Person 2: I'm not a doctor. In fact, I'm a suicide bomber and am planning to initiate the detonation sequence right now. Cancer victim: Well, it doesn't really matter. No matter who shows up, I'll still die anyways. This way, I'll be able to pay a visit to the transcendent city high in the heavens sooner. Person 2: I bet that many would mourn your death at your remembrance ceremony. Cancer victim: That doesn't bother me. My friends and family are close to my heart, but that doesn't warrant eternal proximity with one another in itself. Person 2: Let's go to a better place. Let us finally break free of our mortal chains that have unceasingly been hindering our progress since the first war took place. Cancer victim: Wait, I've changed my mind! Person 2: Too late. I wish I had a time machine... not.

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Why are atheists stupid? Actually, statistically, they are more intelligent than believers.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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A black man and a hispanic man are riding in a car. Who's driving? The hispanic man

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How do wake up Lady Gaga You Poker her face

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Q. How many pancakes can fit in a dog house? A. 0. Penguins don't like icecream.

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom, and American when you come out, what are you inside? American! What are you, a communist?

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What can be any colour and is made of leather? Cars. I lied about the leather part.

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What runs faster than a nigger with a stolen tv? His brother with the remote

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Two gay guys walked in to a bar. It's unfair of me to make the assumption that they're gay, they just be really good friends whom aren't opposed to touching each other.

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Roses are red violets are blue ... Aww I just don't give a damn and nether do you.

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There is a running race, both black and white people are running in this race! Half way through there is an avalanche and every black person running was killed! Who won the race??? Society... :D

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what has green paint and flies? a garbage truck

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How do you fit 1,000 Jews in a Volkswagen? Trick question, you can't.

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Why was the woman making a sandwhich in the kitchen? She was hungry.

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Q: What happened to the teenage girl and the serial rapist at Denny's around midnight? A: They both ordered the french toast Grand Slam breakfast (at Denny's, its breakfast any time!!).

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What did the guard say to the... I was going to finish this anti-joke but I took an arrow to the knee.

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Q:How many doorknobs should you throw at a police man? A:None you should have upmost respect for the law.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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