Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he wanted to get to the other side.

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Your momma's so ugly she adopted you because she had a problem attracting men.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the oceon? Dead in the water.

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What did the penguins get for Christmas? A hang-glider What did the polar bears get for Christmas? Death, The Holocaust, Global Warming, and all of Steven King's books.

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Q: What do you call an aligator in a vest A: Investigator

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What did the republican say to the democrat? You suck!

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Butter. Butter who? Oh, um, sorry i forgot the rest...

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Animal cruelty

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A guy walks into a bar, he has a few drinks than leaves.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your a Jew, I don't like you.

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Good to see you today!

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Why did the blond fall of the ladder? She had no arms.

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A priest and a bunch of boys are in a room. They are having choir practice.

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What do you a a toilet with fecal matter in it? A toilet.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Pizza? A Jew is a person either born into or converted to Judaism, and a Pizza is a disc shaped, oven baked bread typically topped with tomato sauce and cheese.

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Q: What happened to the teenage girl and the serial rapist at Denny's around midnight? A: They both ordered the french toast Grand Slam breakfast (at Denny's, its breakfast any time!!).

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Why did the deaf man go to the concert? He had recently acquired a brand new hearing aid which meant that he was able to hear much better and decided that he wanted to listen to some music.

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Whats red and cant fly a plane. An apple.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman immediately calls the local stable to report the missing stallion, and his owner promptly arrives to take him home. He thanks the landlord and offers a small reward, but it is respectfully declined.

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Know what's funny? Jokes.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sexual offender.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face (pokerface)

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How do you get rid of a boomerang? There are many potential options for getting rid of your boomerang. You can choose to pass it on to somebody as a gift, make a profit through thrift stores or online auctions or perhaps sell it in a newspaper. Alternatively you may wish to simply dispose of it. The average reading speed of an American adult is 300 words per minute. This was exactly 100 words. This means that it took approximately 20 seconds to read it. This means that approximately 4 people died of cancer world wide while you read this.

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What's green and has wheels? A cucumber with wheels.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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