what's funnier than 1 Mecican? 2 Mexicans

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom, and American when you come out, what are you inside? American! What are you, a communist?

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Knock Knock Who's There? I am. I am who? I think someone has contracted amnesia.

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A bear walks into a bar. The building is evacuated swiftly but several people are killed

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A man walked into a bar. What did he say? Ouch.

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What made parashoot paint's so uncool? MC Hammer.

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Haikus are awesome, but sometimes they dont make sense. Refrigerator.

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What is colourful and explodes in the air. I don't know but it sounds cool!

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Q: What do you call an aligator in a vest A: Investigator

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I love my valentine <3 Hes mine no matter what anyone says <3 Cause i love him with all my heart <3

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Good to see you today!

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Why did the blond fall of the ladder? She had no arms.

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What's black, white,and red all over? A crime scene where a black and white man were brutally murdered by a psychopath that is still on the loose and could be killing someone else.

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Religion

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What did the duck say to the man? Nothing. Ducks cannot talk.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Pizza? A Jew is a person either born into or converted to Judaism, and a Pizza is a disc shaped, oven baked bread typically topped with tomato sauce and cheese.

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Gale swallows.

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Sarah Palin

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and Santa Claus are on a plane. This is impossible because Santa Claus does not exist.

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Wumbo

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Whats red and cant fly a plane. An apple.

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A blonde walks into a salon and says "I would like to get my golden locks trimmed." The haircutter replies "surely, just sit yourself down in that chair over there and I'll be with you momentarily." The blonde walks to the chair and sits down. When the haircutter comes over he asks her, "would you please remove your headset, I can't cut your hair while they're on." She laughs at her forgetfulness and removes them obligingly.

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Cancer victim: What kind of doctor are you? Person 2: I'm not a doctor. In fact, I'm a suicide bomber and am planning to initiate the detonation sequence right now. Cancer victim: Well, it doesn't really matter. No matter who shows up, I'll still die anyways. This way, I'll be able to pay a visit to the transcendent city high in the heavens sooner. Person 2: I bet that many would mourn your death at your remembrance ceremony. Cancer victim: That doesn't bother me. My friends and family are close to my heart, but that doesn't warrant eternal proximity with one another in itself. Person 2: Let's go to a better place. Let us finally break free of our mortal chains that have unceasingly been hindering our progress since the first war took place. Cancer victim: Wait, I've changed my mind! Person 2: Too late. I wish I had a time machine... not.

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Why can't Jay cut his hair? Because he has AIDS

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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