What came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither. The single celled amoeba. As billions of years passed, the simple amoeba began to form limbs which it utilized to crawl its way out of the ocean onto dry land. Millions of years would pass before the simplified organism began to develop into a fully functional chicken.

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What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

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Q: why did Helen Keller's dog kill himself? A: Because he couldn't stand to see his owner suffer through blindness and deafness and being the butt of hundreds of offensive and hurtful jokes.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a terrorist -lschles

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Two Jews walk into a bar, and they were both served properly

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My grandmother always use to tell me "slow and steady wins the race." Well, that was before she died in a house fire.

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What's white and cant jump? A Fridge

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A Man goes into a watch store. Why? To buy a watch

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What did the sphinx say to the Minotaur? Nothing, as they are fictional creatures and in according to probable science, don't not exist.

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom, and American when you come out, what are you inside? American! What are you, a communist?

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Q: why are kittens so cute? A: because god created them that way. go fourth and enjoy kittens.

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Q: If I have 13 icecubes, and you have 12 icecubes, how many pancakes can I fit on the roof? A: Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

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A person was born on may 5th 1955 and one day noticed that they had $555.55 in their bank account. The person went to a race and betted all their money on the 5th runner in the 5th race. What happened? The runner came in 5th place.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Ham and Cheese!

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the oceon? Dead in the water.

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What made parashoot paint's so uncool? MC Hammer.

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Q: What did the priest say to the rabbi? A: Our God is a wonderful, loving god; praise his name.

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whats worse than getting beaten up by a bully? realizing your fly was down the whole time and getting beaten up by a bully

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Susie is 14 & she never listens to her mom, why is that? She's deaf.

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Why did the girl buy wine? She was hosting a party for four of her closest friends.

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Why did the baby cross the road? cause it was stapled to the chicken.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know why, but I was standing on the other side of the road and I took it home and mamed the chicken with a powerdrill.

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What do you call a retarded man? Mentally challenged.

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Whats better than winning a Paralympic Gold Medal? Having Legs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops