A guy walks into a bar, he has a few drinks than leaves.

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whats annoying and black? black people

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Why'd the cat have one eye? It got kicked by a goat.

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Q: What happened to the teenage girl and the serial rapist at Denny's around midnight? A: They both ordered the french toast Grand Slam breakfast (at Denny's, its breakfast any time!!).

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My wife's star sign was cancer and it's quite ironic how she died really... She was attacked by a giant crab.

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Wumbo

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A blonde walks into a salon and says "I would like to get my golden locks trimmed." The haircutter replies "surely, just sit yourself down in that chair over there and I'll be with you momentarily." The blonde walks to the chair and sits down. When the haircutter comes over he asks her, "would you please remove your headset, I can't cut your hair while they're on." She laughs at her forgetfulness and removes them obligingly.

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How do you have sex with the blue waffle? stick your penis inside

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What's the difference between a black man and a Jew? Nothing, he's the same person

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What's green and has wheels? A cucumber with wheels.

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How do wake up Lady Gaga You Poker her face

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Your momma's so ugly she adopted you because she had a problem attracting men.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the oceon? Dead in the water.

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whats worse than ten dead babies in one trashcan? one dead baby in ten trashcans

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Do you know what's fun about having sex with twenty-seven year-olds? There are twenty of them.

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What did the young girl get for Christmas? Violently raped and murdered by her abusive father.

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What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Repeatedly raped by her alcoholic, child molesting father.

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There was a Priest, a Rabbi, and a Gay Man on a plane. The plane was going down. The Priest said "amen". The Rabbi said "amein". The Gay Man put his penis in the rabbi's asshole.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Butter. Butter who? Oh, um, sorry i forgot the rest...

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Why did the blond fall of the ladder? She had no arms.

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What happened to the boy who fell off the swing? He got hurt.

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What did the nurse say to the doctor? Boo-hoo, i was pranked over the phone, i'm gonna kill myself now.

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How do you fit 1,000 Jews in a Volkswagen? Trick question, you can't.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, most likely, the chicken escaped from a near by ranch or farm. Upon escaping, he may have simply wandered in the direction of the road, and hence crossed it. Or, with chickens having great curiosity, may have been attracted to something on the other side of the road and felt the urge to explore. Depending on the demographics of the area in which road was in, the chicken had different chances of being hit by an automobile. That's why.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops