What did the black man do with the woman's purse? Safely returned it to her

Why did the boy on stilts pick up the phone? Because it was ringing.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape the overwhelming feeling of self doubt created by an abusive drug addicted father which has left him seeking life threatening situations that should never befall a simple chicken.

Why did the one pound coin cross the road? It was stuck up the chickens ass

two muffins were in an oven. one muffin says, "gee, its hot in here." the other one says, "AH! A TALKING MUFFIN!"

What black and blue and red all over? My mom after my dad comes back from the bar.

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? People leading healthy, active lives physically and socially.

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Someone else's cheese.

Knock, Knock Who is there? Yo Yo who? *the man ran away and was never seen again, because he had nowhere to stay*

Q:What are black basketball players good at? A:Running,shooting and stealing.

Q: Why MohammadReza Is a Bitch? A: Because he isnt a whore

An English man a Scotts man and an Irish man buy a helicopter between them,they go to pick it up after paying for it and realise that non of them can fly it. so they get a refund and go to the pub.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the oceon? Dead in the water.

why did the banana go to the doctor? answer: he wasnt peeling well lollolololloololololololololololololooolololololololol i just fell of my dinosaur

Roses are red It's 4 in the morning I have full blown aids I'm going to bed now, this is boring

What's worse than women's rights? Actually, not much, because women throughout history suffered for too long the hardships of over dominant male figures and deserve the freedoms they have achieved today.

What did the grass say to the human "Hey" The human then screams and runs to safety

What's worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm in it? The spelling errors on anti-jokes.com

What did the Catholic preist say to the altar boy? You've been a good altar boy.

Why did the baby cross the road? cause it was stapled to the chicken.

What's the difference between a prostitute and a cherry red Ferrari? A cherry red Ferrari isn't in my garage.

Why do Jewish people like money so much? Because they can exchange it for goods and services

how do you stop a baby crying hit it with a brick.

What did the guard say to the... I was going to finish this anti-joke but I took an arrow to the knee.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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