Roses are red Violets are red Trees are red Shrubs are red HOLY SHIT! MY YARD IS ON FIRE!

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Knock, knock. Who's there? John. Oh, hey! Come in.

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Why did the old woman put roller skates on her rocking chair? She had dementia.

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lebron

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a Jew had a small nose

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What did the man say to the attractive female bartender as he left the bar? Well, it's been fun but I hate you so I'm leaving to kill your entire family.

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Why did the blonde kid lose the spelling bee? Because she misspelled a word.

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There was a Mexican in a bomb shop ?

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If thin people skinny dip, what do fat people do? Sink

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Whats worse than the holocaust? A n a l

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A dog walks into a bar, looks at the bartender, lifts its leg and pisses on a bar stool. What does the bartender do ? He chases the dog out the bar and gets a mop to mop up the piss.

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Q: Why MohammadReza Is a Bitch? A: Because he isnt a whore

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my bubbles!

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Yo momma so ugly just after she was born, her mother said, "What a treasure!" and her father said, "Yea, let's go bury it!"

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Where do bananas come from? Mexico

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What's red and spins real fast? Not a dead baby in a blender, babies can't fit in there. Unless of course you dismember them. but that's obsurd. . . Kinda

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Q: What do you call a bathtub? A: A bathtub

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The big problem with politicians is they're always lying but fortunately there's always a moment when it's not a problem anymore. When they do it down in their tombs.

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What's 6 inches long, held in your hand, and has a round tip? A pencil you pervert.

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What did the doctor say to the Lawyer? I get paid more

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The NBA lockout

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What happened when a boy threw a ball at the wall? It hit him in the face

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Your landlord. I'm here to collect rent

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Yee

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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