a man walks into a bar he is an alcohol and it's ruining his family

What goes in long and hard and comes out wet and sticky? A penis after orgasmic intercourse.

Why did the aeroplane engine fallon the house? Because of Donnie Darko

Why shouldnt you throw rocks at a black kid on a bike? Because the kid wasn't riding in your way, you could get arrested for assault and battery, and he probably lives in a low income area and cant afford health insurance if he was injured.

Your momma's so fat... She's on a diet.

What happens when a japanese boy goes into a planet called Zypharecion which is 2000 light years away with 20% oxygen and 78% nitrogen and 2% of other earthly air elements and heats up a balloon enough that it explodes? He wont be at that planet because it does not exist and travelling at the speed of light has not been proven possible for humans.

Your momma's so ugly that she was worried that she would never marry anyone.

if a white guy, a black guy and a hispanic guy jump off a 10 story building, who hits the ground first? the man who jumped first. racist.

vn[oiaehsobv[khpogjglprljffknfsiphgeknkldfekageriyreojgyperogerpojregkeporg? cuase u stupid and this stupid joke is to

what did the duck say to the chicken .nothing

Women's rights.

What happened when a boy threw a ball at the wall? It hit him in the face

Knock knock Who's there? Labrinth Come in

What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being cut in half by a human while you were trying to eat an apple

What's worse than one bee sting? 2 bee stings

A man walked into a bar, he then fell to the ground screaming in pain.

Knock Knock. who's there? It's me. you need to be specific...

Why didn't little jimmy get anything for Christmas? He is Jewish.

Know what's funny? Jokes.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer was arrested by the ASPCA and PETA for letting the chicken run free near a horribly busy road

Pickup Line: Hay girl is that a mirror in your pants. Becuase I can see me in it.

Did you hear about the kid napping? They found his body in a ditch.

Why did the boy go swimming in the ocean? He didn't. the current pulled him in and he drowned.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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