Why does Jonny have a phobia birds? Because he has one glued to his face.

Knock Knock Who's There? Boo Boo Who? Boo Smith, I'm the town rapist.

How do wake up Lady Gaga You Poker her face

how do you make a joke act like yourself

Why did the vegetarian only work one day? Because her co-workers are cannibals.

Jesus

Two blondes are walking down the street. One breaks her left high heel and the other is called Monica.

Why did the chiken cross the road. Anwer: because it was being chased by a crazy horny/ kinky redneck.

What did the grass say to the human "Hey" The human then screams and runs to safety

A guy walks into a bar, he has a few drinks than leaves.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Animal cruelty

How's your mum? she's dead..

What did the nurse say to the doctor? Boo-hoo, i was pranked over the phone, i'm gonna kill myself now.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, most likely, the chicken escaped from a near by ranch or farm. Upon escaping, he may have simply wandered in the direction of the road, and hence crossed it. Or, with chickens having great curiosity, may have been attracted to something on the other side of the road and felt the urge to explore. Depending on the demographics of the area in which road was in, the chicken had different chances of being hit by an automobile. That's why.

What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I got a terminal disease and I'm going to die in six months. Mom if you're reading this I love you. Take good care of Joey.

What did the guard say to the... I was going to finish this anti-joke but I took an arrow to the knee.

Why was the asian boy get straight A's? He paid attention during class, took good notes, studied at home, and had a personal drive that lead him to be a good student.

How do you stop a run-away bus? You sit down in the driver's seat and gently place your foot on the brake pedular and proceed to press it down. The brake pads, located in the calipers, will squeeze the brake discs and slow the bus eventually to stop at the crosswalk for the old lady accompanied by a young boy scout to cross the street and continue their wonderful lives.

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -.......

whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff

Your mother is so dumb. It's a good thing she knows sign language.

What do you call a black man jumping out of a plane? A skydiver

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...