What did the man say to the attractive female bartender as he left the bar? Well, it's been fun but I hate you so I'm leaving to kill your entire family.

Whats red and cant fly a plane. An apple.

How do you fit 100 ethiopians in a phone box? With great difficulty.

What's black and white and red all over? And old fashioned television painted red.

A blonde walks into a library. "PLEASE CAN I HAVE A CHEESEBURGER?!" he shouts at the top of his lungs. "Sir, this is a library," the librarian says. "Oh, sorry," he whispers and goes to McDonald's Two years of the routine and he dies of of heart failure and has diabetes.

what do you call a homosexual kid? A Kerich

nick toth

Why was the boy sad? His friend stabbed him with a fork. Also, his mother died. Also, his dad raped him Also, he has a chode. And it really sucks when you have a chode.

The night is always darkest just before the dawn. Just kidding I'm Helen Keller, everything's always dark.

A black man and a hispanic man are riding in a car. Who's driving? The hispanic man

What is the similarety between a car and a banana? Both starts with B

There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Repeatedly raped by her alcoholic, child molesting father.

What's the difference between an orange? Mooses don't like to wear sweater-vests.

What's black, white,and red all over? A crime scene where a black and white man were brutally murdered by a psychopath that is still on the loose and could be killing someone else.

How do you fit 1,000 Jews in a Volkswagen? Trick question, you can't.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, most likely, the chicken escaped from a near by ranch or farm. Upon escaping, he may have simply wandered in the direction of the road, and hence crossed it. Or, with chickens having great curiosity, may have been attracted to something on the other side of the road and felt the urge to explore. Depending on the demographics of the area in which road was in, the chicken had different chances of being hit by an automobile. That's why.

What is the difference between a botlle of sun lotion and a Mexican? A bottle of sun lotion contains a lotion that protects your skin against the sun, and a Mexican is a person from Mexico.

Why'd the cat have one eye? It got kicked by a goat.

Q. Did you hear about the kid napping? A. Yeah, he woke up and was grumpy

What do you call a dead blond in a closet? A homicide victim.

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? - "Robin, get in the Batmobile"

Why did the deaf man go to the concert? He had recently acquired a brand new hearing aid which meant that he was able to hear much better and decided that he wanted to listen to some music.

Q:How many doorknobs should you throw at a police man? A:None you should have upmost respect for the law.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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