What is black, white and red all over? A nun in a blender

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you momas so fat, you momas so ugly Your mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late great Salvador Dali mistook them for cloth.

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What's black and white and red all over? And old fashioned television painted red.

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How do you get a one-armed Polak out of a tree? Get a ladder and carry him down.

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Q:What colors make black? A:Nothing Thats a Shade

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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To be honest that sounds like more of a mental health issue and not something I'm qualified to deal with as a GP. Let me refer you.

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Why did Jack and Jill go up the hill? To get to their house.

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what's funnier than 1 Mecican? 2 Mexicans

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the oceon? Dead in the water.

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A Polish man came home one day from work, hung up his coat, took off his hat and walked into his bedroom shouting "honey I'm home!" What should he see but his best friend in bed with his wife. Infuriated, he rushed to the cupboard, pulled out his gun, put it to his head, pulled the trigger, and died instantly. His children and lecherous wife are forever scarred.

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Whats worse than falling down the stairs? Falling UP the stairs.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a trash can? 12- 18 (depending on size) I know this because i use to work at a abortion clinic

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What couldn't the stereotypical pirate get into the movie? Well, considering that the stereotypical pirate existed in the sixteenth to eightteenth centuries and the first motion picture wasn't made until the mid to late nineteenth century, also the technology for time travel does not exist nor has it ever, I would have to derive that he was not let in due to the fact that there was no way for him to ever exist at the same time that a movie would have been playing.

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yo mama so fat that she should be concerned because diabetes is a serious issue

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Susie is 14 & she never listens to her mom, why is that? She's deaf.

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Want to hear a joke? Me to...

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What did the phone say to the telephone? I can't connect with you.

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A blind man walks into a bar Backs up, and walks around it.

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Q:What's the difference between a pinata and a baby? A: One I hang from a tree and beat to death and the other one is a pinata..

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Women's rights.

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Q: What do a dildo salesman and a car salesman have in common? A: They are both salesman

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Why was the asian boy get straight A's? He paid attention during class, took good notes, studied at home, and had a personal drive that lead him to be a good student.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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