a man walks into a bar he is an alcohol and it's ruining his family

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Two muffins are in an oven. One says "It's getting hot in here". The other one starts to reply but then it's internal organs burst from the heat.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What runs faster than a nigger with a stolen tv? His brother with the remote

thumb_up thumb_down -14

whats worse than ten dead babies in one trashcan? one dead baby in ten trashcans

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How many dead babies can you fit in a trash can? 12- 18 (depending on size) I know this because i use to work at a abortion clinic

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What made parashoot paint's so uncool? MC Hammer.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's red and spins real fast? Not a dead baby in a blender, babies can't fit in there. Unless of course you dismember them. but that's obsurd. . . Kinda

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Want to hear a joke? Me to...

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Your mommas so fat that she may die.

thumb_up thumb_down -60

What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a Cheetah? A yellow Chuck Norris with black spots.

thumb_up thumb_down -76

What did the phone say to the telephone? I can't connect with you.

thumb_up thumb_down -156

How do you fit 1,000 Jews in a Volkswagen? Trick question, you can't.

thumb_up thumb_down +143

Religion

thumb_up thumb_down +85

Q:What's the difference between a pinata and a baby? A: One I hang from a tree and beat to death and the other one is a pinata..

thumb_up thumb_down +63

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? - "Robin, get in the Batmobile"

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Q: What happened to the teenage girl and the serial rapist at Denny's around midnight? A: They both ordered the french toast Grand Slam breakfast (at Denny's, its breakfast any time!!).

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What did the man say to the attractive female bartender as he left the bar? Well, it's been fun but I hate you so I'm leaving to kill your entire family.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Chikin nuggets

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Whats red and cant fly a plane. An apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What do you call a man with three testicles? Polyorchid. Look it up.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why was school cancelled? Because the school was bombed.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

why did the boy drop his ice cream? he tripped over his mother's dead body

thumb_up thumb_down +21

whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How do you have sex with the blue waffle? stick your penis inside

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops