Want to hear a joke? Me to...

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a man cries out to god.... and god does't reply.

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My Roomate-(crying in the fetal position for the love of his life has been murderer) Me- (laughing) I have a problem

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A wolf boards a plane with two dead rabbits in his mouth. The flight attendant approaches him and says, "Sir, you can only have one of those on the plane." The wolf bites her throat out.

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A horse walks into a bar The bartender says "Haha, sucker, this is actually a glue factory" The horse is brutally slaughtered and his remains are sold for a profit as part of a glue product

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? - "Robin, get in the Batmobile"

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What's worse than being gay? Dying in a gas chamber in the Holocaust.

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I need somebody to lean on... ...Because one of my legs was amputated after I was blown up on a mine field in afganistan.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman immediately calls the local stable to report the missing stallion, and his owner promptly arrives to take him home. He thanks the landlord and offers a small reward, but it is respectfully declined.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sexual offender.

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Knock knock

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This guys walks in a forest and meets a bear. So he says : - Yo yo, whattup, bear ? And the bear says "ROAR!" Because he's a bear.

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you momas so fat, you momas so ugly Your mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late great Salvador Dali mistook them for cloth.

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Guess what? Chicken butt! No I have aids, you might want to get yourself tested

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Did you hear about the guy who fell off the mountain? Oh, well he died

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whats worse than ten dead babies in one trashcan? one dead baby in ten trashcans

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What made parashoot paint's so uncool? MC Hammer.

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A man walked into a bar. What did he say? Ouch.

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Haikus are awesome, but sometimes they dont make sense. Refrigerator.

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As a teen girl was walking through the perfume shop, she picked up one called, "Swirly Paradise." She sprayed it on her and sniffed the sweet scent. Suddenly, the world spun around and she suddenly woke up inside an empty bra. A mouse sniffed her and ate her alive.

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What's red and spins real fast? Not a dead baby in a blender, babies can't fit in there. Unless of course you dismember them. but that's obsurd. . . Kinda

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Two gay guys walked in to a bar. It's unfair of me to make the assumption that they're gay, they just be really good friends whom aren't opposed to touching each other.

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Your mommas so fat that she may die.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Butter. Butter who? Oh, um, sorry i forgot the rest...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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