As a teen girl was walking through the perfume shop, she picked up one called, "Swirly Paradise." She sprayed it on her and sniffed the sweet scent. Suddenly, the world spun around and she suddenly woke up inside an empty bra. A mouse sniffed her and ate her alive.

What's red and spins real fast? Not a dead baby in a blender, babies can't fit in there. Unless of course you dismember them. but that's obsurd. . . Kinda

Two gay guys walked in to a bar. It's unfair of me to make the assumption that they're gay, they just be really good friends whom aren't opposed to touching each other.

Your mommas so fat that she may die.

My Roomate-(crying in the fetal position for the love of his life has been murderer) Me- (laughing) I have a problem

What did the girl get for her birthday? Nothing...cause she died

What did the phone say to the telephone? I can't connect with you.

Q:What's the difference between a pinata and a baby? A: One I hang from a tree and beat to death and the other one is a pinata..

Why do Jewish people like money so much? Because they can exchange it for goods and services

A horse walks into a bar The bartender says "Haha, sucker, this is actually a glue factory" The horse is brutally slaughtered and his remains are sold for a profit as part of a glue product

Q: What happened to the teenage girl and the serial rapist at Denny's around midnight? A: They both ordered the french toast Grand Slam breakfast (at Denny's, its breakfast any time!!).

what is long,hard and holds semen,a submarine , i spelled seamen wrong

What did the man say to the attractive female bartender as he left the bar? Well, it's been fun but I hate you so I'm leaving to kill your entire family.

why did the boy drop his ice cream? he tripped over his mother's dead body

What did the idiot call his pet zebra? Charlie. The fact that the man is an idiot is irrelevant.

What cheese is not yours? The one that you didn't buy.

What starts with an F and ends with a UCK? Firetruck.

This guys walks in a forest and meets a bear. So he says : - Yo yo, whattup, bear ? And the bear says "ROAR!" Because he's a bear.

What do you call a black person who drives a plane? A pilot.

What's green and has wheels? A cucumber with wheels.

Why did the chicken cross the road? A scorpion was trying to sting it in the anus and it wanted to escape the undoubtedly painful consequences.

Yo mama so stupid she liked this joke

Guess what? Chicken butt! No I have aids, you might want to get yourself tested

a man walks into a bar he is an alcohol and it's ruining his family

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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