A blonde walks into a salon and says "I would like to get my golden locks trimmed." The haircutter replies "surely, just sit yourself down in that chair over there and I'll be with you momentarily." The blonde walks to the chair and sits down. When the haircutter comes over he asks her, "would you please remove your headset, I can't cut your hair while they're on." She laughs at her forgetfulness and removes them obligingly.

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What did the idiot call his pet zebra? Charlie. The fact that the man is an idiot is irrelevant.

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A blonde walks into a library. "PLEASE CAN I HAVE A CHEESEBURGER?!" he shouts at the top of his lungs. "Sir, this is a library," the librarian says. "Oh, sorry," he whispers and goes to McDonald's Two years of the routine and he dies of of heart failure and has diabetes.

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This guys walks in a forest and meets a bear. So he says : - Yo yo, whattup, bear ? And the bear says "ROAR!" Because he's a bear.

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What's black and white and red all over? And old fashioned television painted red.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Someone else's cheese.

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nick toth

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i'm a loser with body odor.. plus i play pokemon to pass the time because reality is just to horrible to face. guess who? josh wood.

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What is the similarety between a car and a banana? Both starts with B

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Little Johnny asks his father how babies are made. So the father rapes him from behind.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because my first shot missed.

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A barrel of monkeys is only a barrel of laughs if they're alive and telling jokes.

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Knock Knock Who's There? I am. I am who? I think someone has contracted amnesia.

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What can be any colour and is made of leather? Cars. I lied about the leather part.

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A bear walks into a bar. The building is evacuated swiftly but several people are killed

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What made parashoot paint's so uncool? MC Hammer.

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A man walked into a bar. What did he say? Ouch.

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What is colourful and explodes in the air. I don't know but it sounds cool!

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A quadrapeldgic walks no where

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What did the penguins get for Christmas? A hang-glider What did the polar bears get for Christmas? Death, The Holocaust, Global Warming, and all of Steven King's books.

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If Barbie is so popular...why do you have to buy her friends?

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Whats better than pizza? Pepperoni pizza, if you like pepperoni that is.

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My Roomate-(crying in the fetal position for the love of his life has been murderer) Me- (laughing) I have a problem

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What's black, white,and red all over? A crime scene where a black and white man were brutally murdered by a psychopath that is still on the loose and could be killing someone else.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops