Your d*ck is short, If we compare it to mine. That was it, Thank you for your time.

how do you make a joke act like yourself

What's the difference between me and a dead baby? I'm not dead, or a baby. I am well into my teens and very healthy.

what do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Bob

What did the grass say to the human "Hey" The human then screams and runs to safety

What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a Cheetah? A yellow Chuck Norris with black spots.

Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Have Alzheimers, Cheese on Toast.

a jew throwing a dime into a wishing well.

Wat do you do when you see aomeone bleeding on the ground? Walk away and act like nothing happened

How do you fit 1,000 Jews in a Volkswagen? Trick question, you can't.

What is the difference between a botlle of sun lotion and a Mexican? A bottle of sun lotion contains a lotion that protects your skin against the sun, and a Mexican is a person from Mexico.

What did the boy do when he was cold? He got a blanket.

2 ducks walk into a bar. The first orders a drink, drinks it, and drops dead. The other duck said, "Bar tender! What did you put in my friends drink?" The bar tender said, "Poison."

A man walked into a bar, he then fell to the ground screaming in pain.

Why was school cancelled? Because the school was bombed.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face (pokerface)

Did you see the picture of Helen Keller's father? No. Lemme Google it. Oh cool; he had a beard.

A woman got in her car to drive to work. She kept her hands on the wheel and eyes on the road and was able to avoid any accidents that could have occurred.

what do giraffes have that other animals don't have? -baby giraffes

Q. How many pancakes can fit in a dog house? A. 0. Penguins don't like icecream.

What is the difference between muffins and cornbread? I don't enjoy sticking cornbread in my anus.

what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

these jokes are terrible, even for anti-jokes

whats the hardest part of roller skating. Telling your dad that you are gay.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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