What did Tarzan say when he took out his knife? I took out my knife.

Why was timmy crying? He gave his grandmother AIDs...

a man walks into a bar he is an alcohol and it's ruining his family

It's raining, it's pouring The old man is snoring He went to bed, he bumped his head Got a brain hemorrhage and died in his sleep.

Why did the vegetarian only work one day? Because her co-workers are cannibals.

why does crazy george spin a ball on his fingers well? because he has a huge dingo

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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What's worse than a black President... George W Bush

why was the dog barking?? bryan is a douche..... get it troupe.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Butter. Butter who? Oh, um, sorry i forgot the rest...

What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a Cheetah? A yellow Chuck Norris with black spots.

A blind man walks into the door of a bar

What did the phone say to the telephone? I can't connect with you.

What's 6 inches long, held in your hand, and has a round tip? A pencil you pervert.

What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

how do you stop a baby crying hit it with a brick.

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

If you helped Jack on the horse, would you help Jack off the horse? Of course; if he was too short to climb onto the saddle then it would be irresponsible and potentially dangerous not to help him off. As his riding instructor, you would be liable for any injuries Jack sustained had he attempted to dismount the horse with no assistance.

What did the man say to the attractive female bartender as he left the bar? Well, it's been fun but I hate you so I'm leaving to kill your entire family.

How did the fat man die? Someone who was mad at society shot him and many others in the head while at the workplace.

It's easy to take part, just type your text below!

What did the idiot call his pet zebra? Charlie. The fact that the man is an idiot is irrelevant.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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