i love u. so rate me good or i will talk to my lawyer. nothing personal, i just have no arms, legs, or nose and got broken up with by a girlfriend yesterday (and no, she was not fake) Her name was maria. On the bright side, my grandma woke up this morning!

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What's the difference between a prostitute and a cherry red Ferrari? A cherry red Ferrari isn't in my garage.

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Religion

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Why didn't Tommy walk to school? 'Cause he was in a wheelchair..

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Why was the woman making a sandwhich in the kitchen? She was hungry.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, She gave me AIDS, and I gave 'em to you! <3 <3

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What do you call an animal who is purple and feeds on grass? Well his name is Timmy, he is a 6 year old boy and has been diagnosed with a rare deadly disease that turns his skin purple and has removed him so far from reality that he has begin to feed on his front lawn.

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Why was school cancelled? Because the school was bombed.

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What do you call a black person who drives a plane? A pilot.

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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how do you make a joke act like yourself

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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What's the difference between me and a dead baby? I'm not dead, or a baby. I am well into my teens and very healthy.

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What is the difference between muffins and cornbread? I don't enjoy sticking cornbread in my anus.

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Whats worse than falling down the stairs? Falling UP the stairs.

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Haikus are awesome, but sometimes they dont make sense. Refrigerator.

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yo mama so fat that she should be concerned because diabetes is a serious issue

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Susie is 14 & she never listens to her mom, why is that? She's deaf.

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Want to hear a joke? Me to...

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What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Repeatedly raped by her alcoholic, child molesting father.

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lebron

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What did the phone say to the telephone? I can't connect with you.

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Knock knock Who's there? That that that. What makes you say that?

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34

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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