What did the boy do when he was cold? He got a blanket.

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Q. Did you hear about the kid napping? A. Yeah, he woke up and was grumpy

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

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Why was the woman making a sandwhich in the kitchen? She was hungry.

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Knock knock Who's there? Timmy Timmy who? Timmy Smith

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what is long,hard and holds semen,a submarine , i spelled seamen wrong

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and Santa Claus are on a plane. This is impossible because Santa Claus does not exist.

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how long does it take for a black woman to poop? depending on what she ate, about 5 to 10 minutes

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why did the chicken cross the road ??? why would you care??

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Know what's funny? Jokes.

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why did the boy drop his ice cream? he tripped over his mother's dead body

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What do you call a black man jumping out of a plane? A skydiver

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A blonde walks into a salon and says "I would like to get my golden locks trimmed." The haircutter replies "surely, just sit yourself down in that chair over there and I'll be with you momentarily." The blonde walks to the chair and sits down. When the haircutter comes over he asks her, "would you please remove your headset, I can't cut your hair while they're on." She laughs at her forgetfulness and removes them obligingly.

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What starts with an F and ends with a UCK? Firetruck.

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Why did the one pound coin cross the road? It was stuck up the chickens ass

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Why did the chicken cross the road? A scorpion was trying to sting it in the anus and it wanted to escape the undoubtedly painful consequences.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Someone else's cheese.

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Two black guys walk into a country club and ask to play a round of golf. They are turned away because the aren't members of the club.

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What's green and has wheels? A cucumber with wheels.

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On a scale of one to 10, F*ck yourself.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because my first shot missed.

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It's raining, it's pouring The old man is snoring He went to bed, he bumped his head Got a brain hemorrhage and died in his sleep.

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he wanted to get to the other side.

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A guy walks into a bar and says, "Ouch!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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