Q. How many pancakes can fit in a dog house? A. 0. Penguins don't like icecream.

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what do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Bob

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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why did the banana go to the doctor? answer: he wasnt peeling well lollolololloololololololololololololooolololololololol i just fell of my dinosaur

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There was a Priest, a Rabbi, and a Gay Man on a plane. The plane was going down. The Priest said "amen". The Rabbi said "amein". The Gay Man put his penis in the rabbi's asshole.

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What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Repeatedly raped by her alcoholic, child molesting father.

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My Roomate-(crying in the fetal position for the love of his life has been murderer) Me- (laughing) I have a problem

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Butter. Butter who? Oh, um, sorry i forgot the rest...

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Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange. Aren't You Glad I Didn't Say Cliterus?

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Wat do you do when you see aomeone bleeding on the ground? Walk away and act like nothing happened

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Knock knock Who's there? That that that. What makes you say that?

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? He said, "Where's my tractor?"

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Zebras.

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why was the little girl crying? because her dad hit her.

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YouTube comment: If I get a cent for every pixel on the screen. I would have... $960 for a 224p video $2049.6 240p video $1296 for a 270p video $2304 for a 360p video $4099.2 for a 480p video $9984 for a 520p video $9216 for a 720p video $20736 for a 1080p video $125829.12 for a 2304p video ... I would be RICH!!

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman immediately calls the local stable to report the missing stallion, and his owner promptly arrives to take him home. He thanks the landlord and offers a small reward, but it is respectfully declined.

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It's easy to take part, just type your text below!

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face (pokerface)

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Knock knock. Who's there? I just ding dong ditched you.

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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What's black and white and red all over? And old fashioned television painted red.

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Hey Tim lets think of a joke

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and think it's original because I changed one word*

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Knock Knock Who's there? me oh

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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