What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a Cheetah? A yellow Chuck Norris with black spots.

Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Have Alzheimers, Cheese on Toast.

a jew throwing a dime into a wishing well.

Wat do you do when you see aomeone bleeding on the ground? Walk away and act like nothing happened

How do you fit 1,000 Jews in a Volkswagen? Trick question, you can't.

What is the difference between a botlle of sun lotion and a Mexican? A bottle of sun lotion contains a lotion that protects your skin against the sun, and a Mexican is a person from Mexico.

2 ducks walk into a bar. The first orders a drink, drinks it, and drops dead. The other duck said, "Bar tender! What did you put in my friends drink?" The bar tender said, "Poison."

A man walked into a bar, he then fell to the ground screaming in pain.

Why was school cancelled? Because the school was bombed.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face (pokerface)

How much does a polar bear weigh? Around a thousand pounds.

Did you see the picture of Helen Keller's father? No. Lemme Google it. Oh cool; he had a beard.

what do giraffes have that other animals don't have? -baby giraffes

A woman got in her car to drive to work. She kept her hands on the wheel and eyes on the road and was able to avoid any accidents that could have occurred.

how do you make a joke act like yourself

What is the difference between muffins and cornbread? I don't enjoy sticking cornbread in my anus.

these jokes are terrible, even for anti-jokes

whats the hardest part of roller skating. Telling your dad that you are gay.

What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Repeatedly raped by her alcoholic, child molesting father.

lebron

What's the difference between an orange? Mooses don't like to wear sweater-vests.

Why did the baby cross the road? cause it was stapled to the chicken.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, most likely, the chicken escaped from a near by ranch or farm. Upon escaping, he may have simply wandered in the direction of the road, and hence crossed it. Or, with chickens having great curiosity, may have been attracted to something on the other side of the road and felt the urge to explore. Depending on the demographics of the area in which road was in, the chicken had different chances of being hit by an automobile. That's why.

A wolf boards a plane with two dead rabbits in his mouth. The flight attendant approaches him and says, "Sir, you can only have one of those on the plane." The wolf bites her throat out.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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