What do you call an animal who is purple and feeds on grass? Well his name is Timmy, he is a 6 year old boy and has been diagnosed with a rare deadly disease that turns his skin purple and has removed him so far from reality that he has begin to feed on his front lawn.

What looks and sounds just like a seagull ? A seagull.

why did the girl smear penut butter on the road. To go with the trafic jam

Why was the Jewish man put to death? Because he was convicted by a jury of his peers in a fair trial overseen by a judge in good standing in a United States court for 12 counts of homicide

Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Were your parents drunk when they named you?

Why did the boy on stilts pick up the phone? Because it was ringing.

nick toth

Why did the chicken cross the road? know on knows as he can't talk

Little Johnny asks his father how babies are made. So the father rapes him from behind.

It's raining, it's pouring The old man is snoring He went to bed, he bumped his head Got a brain hemorrhage and died in his sleep.

Did you hear about the guy who fell off the mountain? Oh, well he died

whats white and smells like black paint? nothing, white paint even though it is still paint has a slightly different smell due to the difference in dye colors used to make it

Knock, Knock. Come in.

Susie is 14 & she never listens to her mom, why is that? She's deaf.

why did the banana go to the doctor? answer: he wasnt peeling well lollolololloololololololololololololooolololololololol i just fell of my dinosaur

If Barbie is so popular...why do you have to buy her friends?

Your mommas so fat that she may die.

My Roomate-(crying in the fetal position for the love of his life has been murderer) Me- (laughing) I have a problem

What did the girl get for her birthday? Nothing...cause she died

How do you fit 1,000 Jews in a Volkswagen? Trick question, you can't.

What's pink and smells like chicken? A pink hair band, I was lying about the chicken part.

Religion

Q:What's the difference between a pinata and a baby? A: One I hang from a tree and beat to death and the other one is a pinata..

Why was the woman making a sandwhich in the kitchen? She was hungry.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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