Your mommas so fat that she may die.

Why did the girl buy wine? She was hosting a party for four of her closest friends.

I just lost the game where if you think about the game then you lose the game. so did you.

What did the boy do when he was cold? He got a blanket.

why didnt the chicken cross the road? he did cross the road

Knock knock Who's there? Timmy Timmy who? Timmy Smith

Why did the hipster hate black people? Because he was racist.

Me: Knock Knock! You: Door's Open!

Ice cream You scream We all scream Because there is a murderer killing our friends

A blonde walks into a salon and says "I would like to get my golden locks trimmed." The haircutter replies "surely, just sit yourself down in that chair over there and I'll be with you momentarily." The blonde walks to the chair and sits down. When the haircutter comes over he asks her, "would you please remove your headset, I can't cut your hair while they're on." She laughs at her forgetfulness and removes them obligingly.

What starts with an F and ends with a UCK? Firetruck.

A blonde walks into a library. "PLEASE CAN I HAVE A CHEESEBURGER?!" he shouts at the top of his lungs. "Sir, this is a library," the librarian says. "Oh, sorry," he whispers and goes to McDonald's Two years of the routine and he dies of of heart failure and has diabetes.

Why was the Jewish man put to death? Because he was convicted by a jury of his peers in a fair trial overseen by a judge in good standing in a United States court for 12 counts of homicide

*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and think it's original because I changed one word*

What's more stinky than a fart? More farts.

Why did the one pound coin cross the road? It was stuck up the chickens ass

Richard fell off of a cliff. He can fly.

Jesus

Did you hear about the guy who fell off the mountain? Oh, well he died

What rhymes with you? You.

Q: Why did the man move out of his house? A: He found another, for a better price.

what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

"What's 'green', 'blue', and 'red' all over?" My color-blind friend said in confusion.

why did the banana go to the doctor? answer: he wasnt peeling well lollolololloololololololololololololooolololololololol i just fell of my dinosaur

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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