Ever since I've been using chloroform as cologne I've been getting laid a lot.

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Awesome! I've just received my giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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Why did the golfer take an extra pair of pants to the golf course? In case they ripped and he needed a replacement.

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What made parashoot paint's so uncool? MC Hammer.

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What's funnier than House? Family Guy.

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What's red and spins real fast? Not a dead baby in a blender, babies can't fit in there. Unless of course you dismember them. but that's obsurd. . . Kinda

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Why did the baby cross the road? cause it was stapled to the chicken.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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what does the pope have against homosexuals a whip

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Your mom is so...wonderful.

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What did the boy who succsesfully came out of liposection get? Diobeeties.

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In Soviet Russia, there are communists.

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What's a pirate's favorite letter of the alphabet? Aye, ye be thinkin' it to be "ARRRR" - but it be the C

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A negro named Kanye walks into a Tavern... He's stoned to death.

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"Welcome to Mcdonalds, Would you like to try our new Chicken BigMac today?" "No"

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An Irishman walks into a bar. He gets extremely drunk and gets hit by a train.

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A man and his family walk into a talent agent's office. The man proceeds to sexually accost his wife and children. The agent calls security who escort the family out and helps the wife find a domestic violence shelter to stay at.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs on your porch? Matt.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? A n a l

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Cancer victim: What kind of doctor are you? Person 2: I'm not a doctor. In fact, I'm a suicide bomber and am planning to initiate the detonation sequence right now. Cancer victim: Well, it doesn't really matter. No matter who shows up, I'll still die anyways. This way, I'll be able to pay a visit to the transcendent city high in the heavens sooner. Person 2: I bet that many would mourn your death at your remembrance ceremony. Cancer victim: That doesn't bother me. My friends and family are close to my heart, but that doesn't warrant eternal proximity with one another in itself. Person 2: Let's go to a better place. Let us finally break free of our mortal chains that have unceasingly been hindering our progress since the first war took place. Cancer victim: Wait, I've changed my mind! Person 2: Too late. I wish I had a time machine... not.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Were your parents drunk when they named you?

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Why can't Jay cut his hair? Because he has AIDS

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What do you call an Arab flying a plane? A pilot. *BOOM* Never mind, he was a terrorist.

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2 guys walk into a bar, a third guy carefully ducks under it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops