What did the man say to the attractive female bartender as he left the bar? Well, it's been fun but I hate you so I'm leaving to kill your entire family.

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Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

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Why was the asian boy get straight A's? He paid attention during class, took good notes, studied at home, and had a personal drive that lead him to be a good student.

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What do you call a man with three testicles? Polyorchid. Look it up.

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Q: what is more sad than being alone A: being alone with lots of cats

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A blonde walks into a salon and says "I would like to get my golden locks trimmed." The haircutter replies "surely, just sit yourself down in that chair over there and I'll be with you momentarily." The blonde walks to the chair and sits down. When the haircutter comes over he asks her, "would you please remove your headset, I can't cut your hair while they're on." She laughs at her forgetfulness and removes them obligingly.

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Whats 9+10? 19

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Knock knock

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Q: Why did the bully hit the kid A:Because he is a bully-I thought that would have been self explanitory.

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what did the hobo do when he saw timmy get hit by the bus and drop his ice cream? stole the ice cream and laughed

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you momas so fat, you momas so ugly Your mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late great Salvador Dali mistook them for cloth.

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Two black guys walk into a country club and ask to play a round of golf. They are turned away because the aren't members of the club.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? A scorpion was trying to sting it in the anus and it wanted to escape the undoubtedly painful consequences.

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Why was the boy sad? His friend stabbed him with a fork. Also, his mother died. Also, his dad raped him Also, he has a chode. And it really sucks when you have a chode.

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i'm a loser with body odor.. plus i play pokemon to pass the time because reality is just to horrible to face. guess who? josh wood.

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Knock Knock "Who's There?" *No answer* The man proceeds to go on with his life

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What's the difference between me and a dead baby? I'm not dead, or a baby. I am well into my teens and very healthy.

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What do you call a donkey walking backwards a confused donkey

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom, and American when you come out, what are you inside? American! What are you, a communist?

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There are 3 type of people in the world. People who can count, and people who can't.

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A bear walks into a bar. The building is evacuated swiftly but several people are killed

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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A man walked into a bar. What did he say? Ouch.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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