What is the similarety between a car and a banana? Both starts with B

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he wanted to get to the other side.

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom, and American when you come out, what are you inside? American! What are you, a communist?

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Did you hear about the guy who fell off the mountain? Oh, well he died

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Whats worse than falling down the stairs? Falling UP the stairs.

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what do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Bob

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What's funnier than House? Family Guy.

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To the person who wrote the dislike joke: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAH GOOD FAIL!

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"What's 'green', 'blue', and 'red' all over?" My color-blind friend said in confusion.

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What's red and spins real fast? Not a dead baby in a blender, babies can't fit in there. Unless of course you dismember them. but that's obsurd. . . Kinda

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Q: What do you call an aligator in a vest A: Investigator

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Have Alzheimers, Cheese on Toast.

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Good to see you today!

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What happened to the boy who fell off the swing? He got hurt.

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A wolf boards a plane with two dead rabbits in his mouth. The flight attendant approaches him and says, "Sir, you can only have one of those on the plane." The wolf bites her throat out.

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Q: What did the mime say to the crowd gathered at the crime scene? A:

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Why do Jewish people like money so much? Because they can exchange it for goods and services

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A horse walks into a bar The bartender says "Haha, sucker, this is actually a glue factory" The horse is brutally slaughtered and his remains are sold for a profit as part of a glue product

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Whats red and cant fly a plane. An apple.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman immediately calls the local stable to report the missing stallion, and his owner promptly arrives to take him home. He thanks the landlord and offers a small reward, but it is respectfully declined.

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your mother is so rather large that when she stepped onto a scale, it stated her exact body weight which was 280 pounds. Which come to think of it isn't that big considering that obesity is now the norm and average people are referred to as abnormal.

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Q: What is hard and long on a man? A: His wife's funeral

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A blonde walks into a salon and says "I would like to get my golden locks trimmed." The haircutter replies "surely, just sit yourself down in that chair over there and I'll be with you momentarily." The blonde walks to the chair and sits down. When the haircutter comes over he asks her, "would you please remove your headset, I can't cut your hair while they're on." She laughs at her forgetfulness and removes them obligingly.

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What do you call a black man jumping out of a plane? A skydiver

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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