Why can't Jay cut his hair? Because he has AIDS

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A woman got in her car to drive to work. She kept her hands on the wheel and eyes on the road and was able to avoid any accidents that could have occurred.

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Q: why are kittens so cute? A: because god created them that way. go fourth and enjoy kittens.

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How did Helen Keller become blind and deaf? Scarlet fever or meningitis.

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Q: Why did the man move out of his house? A: He found another, for a better price.

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I love my valentine <3 Hes mine no matter what anyone says <3 Cause i love him with all my heart <3

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what has green paint and flies? a garbage truck

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What did the priest do when he noticed the young boy bent over picking up crayons he had dropped? He helped him pick them up

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What's worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm in it? The spelling errors on anti-jokes.com

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Knock knock. Who's there? Awkward silence Awkward silence who? ...

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A man walks into a bar He says ouch

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Ask me how old my cat is. How old's your cat? I don't know.

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A wolf boards a plane with two dead rabbits in his mouth. The flight attendant approaches him and says, "Sir, you can only have one of those on the plane." The wolf bites her throat out.

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What did the lawyer get for Christmas? More paper work

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what do you call skiediving? a very fun but moderatly dangerouse sport that many people have fun doing from the ages of 19 to 31

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Knock Knock. Martha, get the door I'm watching the game!

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -.......

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Why did the girl say 'baa'? Because she was a lamb.

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Did you hear about the black man who went to college? Me too! I'm so proud of him!

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What's cheese that's not yours? Mine.

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What black and blue and red all over? My mom after my dad comes back from the bar.

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Your mama's so fat, she gets confused with Santa Claus.

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Why did the chiken cross the road. Anwer: because it was being chased by a crazy horny/ kinky redneck.

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What happens when a japanese boy goes into a planet called Zypharecion which is 2000 light years away with 20% oxygen and 78% nitrogen and 2% of other earthly air elements and heats up a balloon enough that it explodes? He wont be at that planet because it does not exist and travelling at the speed of light has not been proven possible for humans.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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