Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, She gave me AIDS, and I gave 'em to you! <3 <3

What did the furnace say to the Jew? Nothing, as it is an inanimate object and cannot communicate.

Yee

Ice cream You scream We all scream Because there is a murderer killing our friends

What's cheese that's not yours? Mine.

What black and blue and red all over? My mom after my dad comes back from the bar.

Your mama's so fat, she gets confused with Santa Claus.

Q: why are kittens so cute? A: because god created them that way. go fourth and enjoy kittens.

why was the panda sent to prison? he played a major roll in the bombing of 9-11

Why did the chiken cross the road. Anwer: because it was being chased by a crazy horny/ kinky redneck.

56

The big problem with politicians is they're always lying but fortunately there's always a moment when it's not a problem anymore. When they do it down in their tombs.

I love my valentine <3 Hes mine no matter what anyone says <3 Cause i love him with all my heart <3

what has green paint and flies? a garbage truck

How fast is the speed of sex? 70 mph, minimum 40 mph

What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a Cheetah? A yellow Chuck Norris with black spots.

What did the Catholic preist say to the altar boy? You've been a good altar boy.

what do you call skiediving? a very fun but moderatly dangerouse sport that many people have fun doing from the ages of 19 to 31

Did you hear about the kidnapping yesterday? He slept for at least 3 hours.

Three nuns walk into a bar. They realize they are in a place they don't want to be, so they leave, casting furtive glances around, fearing that someone from their congregation will see them and think they went in to drink.

America Votes

What do you call a black guy eating fried chicken? His name.

What did the guard say to the... I was going to finish this anti-joke but I took an arrow to the knee.

Why did the girl say 'baa'? Because she was a lamb.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...