What's the difference between me and a dead baby? I'm not dead, or a baby. I am well into my teens and very healthy.

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What's my name? I don't know u tell me.

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An English man a Scotts man and an Irish man buy a helicopter between them,they go to pick it up after paying for it and realise that non of them can fly it. so they get a refund and go to the pub.

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A man walked into a bar. What did he say? Ouch.

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what's blue and white and red all over? -nothing the "red all over" part implies a contradiction to blue and white.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? A warm meal thanks to a Charity organization.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? - "Robin, get in the Batmobile"

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If you helped Jack on the horse, would you help Jack off the horse? Of course; if he was too short to climb onto the saddle then it would be irresponsible and potentially dangerous not to help him off. As his riding instructor, you would be liable for any injuries Jack sustained had he attempted to dismount the horse with no assistance.

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why did the boy drop his ice cream? he tripped over his mother's dead body

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Actually it couldn't even walk because of all the hormones they injected into it in order to genetically enhance it's size and flavor.

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why did the chicken cross the road ??? why would you care??

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Q:How many doorknobs should you throw at a police man? A:None you should have upmost respect for the law.

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How many hispanics does it take to screw in a light bulb. One. Just one. You just screw it in, it's not that complicated.

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What's more stinky than a fart? More farts.

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what do you call a homosexual kid? A Kerich

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Around a thousand pounds.

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Ever since I've been using chloroform as cologne I've been getting laid a lot.

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To be honest that sounds like more of a mental health issue and not something I'm qualified to deal with as a GP. Let me refer you.

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Why did Jack and Jill go up the hill? To get to their house.

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A: Knock knock B: "NOOOO" A: *Comes in, sees masturbating son*

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Why did Charlie fall? He got shot 24 times in the chest.

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whats worse than ten dead babies in one trashcan? one dead baby in ten trashcans

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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An old man gets into a van with two little boys. They are his grandsons.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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