What do you call a black man on the side of the road? -A black man who needs a ride.

Why did the monkey fall out the tree? Because he was dead.

Chuck Norris was walking down the street when he was confronted by an armed, very desperate street robber. Chuck unfortunately made the decision to defend himself, and was shot in the gut before he could complete a roundhouse kick. The robber then took his wallet and ran off, undoubtedly to buy drugs.

John had 32 candy bars. He ate 28 of them. What does John have now? daibetes, john has diabetes.

What did he hellen keller say to her dad ? Nothing she cant talk

Two black guys walk into a country club and ask to play a round of golf. They are turned away because the aren't members of the club.

Knock knock. Who's there? Not Madeline McCann.

The white guy did it!

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -.......

What do you call a boy that fell off a ferry? Extremely unlucky, since one of the other passengers noticed and the captain turned the ferry around, threw him a ladder, and pulled him aboard. Also he died of hepatitis because his mother was too poor to afford condoms, so he was born with it.

A Priest and a Rabbi walk into a grocery store. As they walk past the meat section, the Priest stops, smiles, and turns to the Rabbi. "Feeling Hungry?" The Rabbi reaches down and picks up a pack of Koscher hotdogs.

A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

A black, a muslim, and a communist walk into a bar, the bartender says "what will it be Mr. President?

Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Weird, orange is my favorite color.

A cow walks into a bar and says, "moo."

So there were two palm trees on an island. The first palm tree says to the second, "Hey! What's up?" The second one replies, "Nothing much, just chilling." Except they were actually ice cubes.

Why did Sally fall of the Swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

why does crazy george spin a ball on his fingers well? because he has a huge dingo

What can be any colour and is made of leather? Cars. I lied about the leather part.

What do you get when you cross a pelican with a mountain goat? It's hard to say.

What color is a banana? yellow.

What's that smell? Your feces droping in the toilet

Whats green and tasty? Snot

What's black, white,and red all over? A crime scene where a black and white man were brutally murdered by a psychopath that is still on the loose and could be killing someone else.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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