A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long face?". The horse doesn't reply because horse can't talk.

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Kid 1: "Want a Hurts Doughnut?" Kid 2: "Umm... sure." Kid 1 opens up a box of freshly baked Hurts doughnut from Hurts Bakery and gives one to kid 2

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Sarah Palin

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One aardvark says to the other aardvark, "Hi." The other aardvark says, "Ahh! A talking aarkvard."

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A man walked into a bar, he then fell to the ground screaming in pain.

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -.......

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What looks and sounds just like a seagull ? A seagull.

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Q: what is more sad than being alone A: being alone with lots of cats

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Why did the man punch his wife? Because he was angry

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Why did the boy on stilts pick up the phone? Because it was ringing.

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A man walked in a bar had 4 drinks and walked home because drunk driving is dangerous

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what did the hobo do when he saw timmy get hit by the bus and drop his ice cream? stole the ice cream and laughed

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Why is it hard to fool an aborted fetus? Because it wasn't born yesterday.

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Cancer victim: What kind of doctor are you? Person 2: I'm not a doctor. In fact, I'm a suicide bomber and am planning to initiate the detonation sequence right now. Cancer victim: Well, it doesn't really matter. No matter who shows up, I'll still die anyways. This way, I'll be able to pay a visit to the transcendent city high in the heavens sooner. Person 2: I bet that many would mourn your death at your remembrance ceremony. Cancer victim: That doesn't bother me. My friends and family are close to my heart, but that doesn't warrant eternal proximity with one another in itself. Person 2: Let's go to a better place. Let us finally break free of our mortal chains that have unceasingly been hindering our progress since the first war took place. Cancer victim: Wait, I've changed my mind! Person 2: Too late. I wish I had a time machine... not.

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Hey Tim lets think of a joke

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Someone else's cheese.

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A black man and a hispanic man are riding in a car. Who's driving? The hispanic man

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Q. How many pancakes can fit in a dog house? A. 0. Penguins don't like icecream.

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What's funnier than House? Family Guy.

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Q: What did the priest say to the rabbi? A: Our God is a wonderful, loving god; praise his name.

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penis

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Two gay guys walked in to a bar. It's unfair of me to make the assumption that they're gay, they just be really good friends whom aren't opposed to touching each other.

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A Woman out of the kitchen

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a man cries out to god.... and god does't reply.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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