What did the girl get for her birthday? Nothing...cause she died

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What did the duck say to the man? Nothing. Ducks cannot talk.

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why was the little girl crying? because her dad hit her.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, She gave me AIDS, and I gave 'em to you! <3 <3

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What did the black man do with the woman's purse? Safely returned it to her

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why did the boy drop his ice cream? he tripped over his mother's dead body

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Why was school cancelled? Because the school was bombed.

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Q: what is more sad than being alone A: being alone with lots of cats

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Ice cream You scream We all scream Because there is a murderer killing our friends

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Why did the man punch his wife? Because he was angry

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your neighbor.

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How did the square become a circle? Due to the period of recession in our nation, it was found necessary to cut corners.

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why did the chicken cross the road? It is a domestic bird in the wild that is free to go where ever it wants to, that's why

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Did you see the picture of Helen Keller's father? No. Lemme Google it. Oh cool; he had a beard.

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A man and his family walk into a talent agent's office. The man proceeds to sexually accost his wife and children. The agent calls security who escort the family out and helps the wife find a domestic violence shelter to stay at.

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Ever since I've been using chloroform as cologne I've been getting laid a lot.

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Two blondes are walking down the street. One breaks her left high heel and the other is called Monica.

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Knock, Knock. Come in.

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A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender for 4 beers. The bartender replies, "One at a time, mate, will that work for you?" To which the man replies, "No", leaves, and drives his 1994 Toyota Corolla off of the road into the pit of a volcano.

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Q: What did the priest say to the rabbi? A: Our God is a wonderful, loving god; praise his name.

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what did one caterpillar say to another caterpillar? let's be butterflies

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Your mommas so fat that she may die.

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i love u. so rate me good or i will talk to my lawyer. nothing personal, i just have no arms, legs, or nose and got broken up with by a girlfriend yesterday (and no, she was not fake) Her name was maria. On the bright side, my grandma woke up this morning!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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