i love u. so rate me good or i will talk to my lawyer. nothing personal, i just have no arms, legs, or nose and got broken up with by a girlfriend yesterday (and no, she was not fake) Her name was maria. On the bright side, my grandma woke up this morning!

Your mom is so...wonderful.

What is the difference between a botlle of sun lotion and a Mexican? A bottle of sun lotion contains a lotion that protects your skin against the sun, and a Mexican is a person from Mexico.

What did the doctor say to the Lawyer? I get paid more

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Zebras.

One aardvark says to the other aardvark, "Hi." The other aardvark says, "Ahh! A talking aarkvard."

Kid 1: "Want a Hurts Doughnut?" Kid 2: "Umm... sure." Kid 1 opens up a box of freshly baked Hurts doughnut from Hurts Bakery and gives one to kid 2

why was the little girl crying? because her dad hit her.

Sarah Palin

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, She gave me AIDS, and I gave 'em to you! <3 <3

What's brown and sticky? a stick.

What do you call a woman with a penis? A Hermaphrodite.

Why was the asian boy get straight A's? He paid attention during class, took good notes, studied at home, and had a personal drive that lead him to be a good student.

Q: What is hard and long on a man? A: His wife's funeral

why did the girl smear penut butter on the road. To go with the trafic jam

What's black and white and red all over? And old fashioned television painted red.

whats red and smells like blue paint? Hank Kovalcik

Hey Tim lets think of a joke

What's black and blue and red all over? A person who was just in a fight.

A black man and a hispanic man are riding in a car. Who's driving? The hispanic man

Q. How many pancakes can fit in a dog house? A. 0. Penguins don't like icecream.

what do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Bob

Your momma's so fat... She's on a diet.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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