Why is it hard to fool an aborted fetus? Because it wasn't born yesterday.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q:Ask me my name. A:What is your name? A:Hey why do you need to know that?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Want to hear a joke about Potassium? So do I.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How did the black guy cross the street? He jumped it.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

why did the chicken cross the road? It is a domestic bird in the wild that is free to go where ever it wants to, that's why

thumb_up thumb_down -1

There was a Mexican in a bomb shop ?

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Bob

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A man walks into a bar... and watches the Monday Night Football game with his pals.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Your momma's so ugly she adopted you because she had a problem attracting men.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the chiken cross the road. Anwer: because it was being chased by a crazy horny/ kinky redneck.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the chess grandmaster lose his mind? Because he died of old age.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What couldn't the stereotypical pirate get into the movie? Well, considering that the stereotypical pirate existed in the sixteenth to eightteenth centuries and the first motion picture wasn't made until the mid to late nineteenth century, also the technology for time travel does not exist nor has it ever, I would have to derive that he was not let in due to the fact that there was no way for him to ever exist at the same time that a movie would have been playing.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How did Helen Keller become blind and deaf? Scarlet fever or meningitis.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What happens when a japanese boy goes into a planet called Zypharecion which is 2000 light years away with 20% oxygen and 78% nitrogen and 2% of other earthly air elements and heats up a balloon enough that it explodes? He wont be at that planet because it does not exist and travelling at the speed of light has not been proven possible for humans.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Skittles are tasteless. Why? You can't taste the rainbow.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

what did one caterpillar say to another caterpillar? let's be butterflies

thumb_up thumb_down -67

Kony 2012

thumb_up thumb_down -79

roses are red violets are blue you look like a monkey lets take you to the zoo if by chance you try to escape ill take my fist and smash your little monkey face! btw i made this up if you use it ill kick your nuts!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +104

What did the lawyer get for Christmas? More paper work

thumb_up thumb_down +80

Why does a black man break into a car? Because he had closed the windows and locked his keys inside.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

What's the difference between a Jew and a Pizza? A Jew is a person either born into or converted to Judaism, and a Pizza is a disc shaped, oven baked bread typically topped with tomato sauce and cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

what is worse then stubbing your toe in the dark? -september 11th

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q:What are black basketball players good at? A:Running,shooting and stealing.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops