why did the chicken cross the road? It is a domestic bird in the wild that is free to go where ever it wants to, that's why

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A man walked in a bar had 4 drinks and walked home because drunk driving is dangerous

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What black and blue and red all over? My mom after my dad comes back from the bar.

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What's black and blue and red all over? A person who was just in a fight.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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what is worse then stubbing your toe in the dark? -september 11th

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A black man and a hispanic man are riding in a car. Who's driving? The hispanic man

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A guy walks into a bar and says, "Ouch!"

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Why did the chiken cross the road. Anwer: because it was being chased by a crazy horny/ kinky redneck.

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Whats worse than falling down the stairs? Falling UP the stairs.

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Oh look, I've found my knife

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What's the most stupid thing you have ever heard? Woman's Studies.

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Why was the man angry? Because I slept with his wife.

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A Woman out of the kitchen

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what did one caterpillar say to another caterpillar? let's be butterflies

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What couldn't the Asian drive? Because he had just gotten laser eye surgery, and the doctor recommended that he didn't drive for a few days.

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Roses are der, Violets are lube, I am dyslexic.

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Q: What did the mime say to the crowd gathered at the crime scene? A:

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Q: what is more sad than being alone A: being alone with lots of cats

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Why did the one pound coin cross the road? It was stuck up the chickens ass

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and think it's original because I changed one word*

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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Q: What is a African man with funny clothing and children straddling onto his back for dear life/ screaming in fear who only a few minutes ago before a particular incident made several young children cry and being chased by an authority figure? A: An intentionally inane circus performer partcipating in a scintillating rendition alongside his two children of who inadvertently frightened a small group of youth before he immediately decided to proceed by, during one of his extremely long, albeit few breaks, taking the members of his family on an interesting excursion to the nearby amusement park for occassional thrills. On the initial journey there, the black man, out of haste, accidentally dropped one of his children's most valuable toys of which elicited undeniably obnoxious bouts of sadness to come bursting out of his children's respective chests and an increased rate-of-travel for his wife of who accopanied him on his adventure and desired to assist him in his panic. In the spin of events, the man experienced an instance of hyper-activedness and spun out of control for a minute before eventually cooling down. Hence the screaming.

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There was an old lady from Ealing Who had a peculiar feeling She lay on her back Opened her crack And pissed all over the ceiling The old lady then lay in her own waste for over two weeks due to neglect by uncaring nursing home staff. Six months later, a hidden camera documentary on underperforming care homes exposed the abuse and neglect and the old lady went to live with her son and his family. In the early hours of May 14th 2011, the whole family were killed in a house fire that gutted the home and saw fires spread to neighbouring houses. Firefighters say the blaze originated in the spare room and was caused by exposed wiring on an electrical blanket. Forensic experts said that the repeated urination on the blanket would likely corrode the wiring due to the acidic content of urine.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops