Knock Knock. Martha, get the door I'm watching the game!

why didnt the chicken cross the road? he did cross the road

What do you call a black guy eating fried chicken? His name.

Two people on a boat, Pete and Repete. Pete fell off and Repete radioed the Coast Guard, who sadly got there just in time to watch him drown to his death.

What did the nintendo Wii say as it went down the slide? They don't talk.

how long does it take for a black woman to poop? depending on what she ate, about 5 to 10 minutes

WOMENS RIGHTS

whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff

Your mother is so dumb. It's a good thing she knows sign language.

what did the hobo do when he saw timmy get hit by the bus and drop his ice cream? stole the ice cream and laughed

Why did the boy on stilts pick up the phone? Because it was ringing.

Ever since I've been using chloroform as cologne I've been getting laid a lot.

Why can't Jay cut his hair? Because he has AIDS

Edward and Bella looked at each other. Then they both died. Oh, and Jacob is actually a transvestite.

How did Helen Keller become blind and deaf? Scarlet fever or meningitis.

What's funnier than House? Family Guy.

A Woman out of the kitchen

What did the Catholic preist say to the altar boy? You've been a good altar boy.

A kitten walks into a bar and orders a saucer of milk. Everyone enjoys the novelty of his presence.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long face?". The horse doesn't reply because horse can't talk.

What did the woman say to her husband after he came home from a late night of drinking? Nothing, because the last time she did, she got her ass beat.

Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

women's rights

Me: Knock Knock! You: Door's Open!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...