Q: why did Helen Keller's dog kill himself? A: Because he couldn't stand to see his owner suffer through blindness and deafness and being the butt of hundreds of offensive and hurtful jokes.

What looks and sounds just like a seagull ? A seagull.

A black, a muslim, and a communist walk into a bar, the bartender says "what will it be Mr. President?

Why did the man punch his wife? Because he was angry

A man walked in a bar had 4 drinks and walked home because drunk driving is dangerous

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scottishman walk into a gay bar. And why shoudn't they.

Why is it hard to fool an aborted fetus? Because it wasn't born yesterday.

Cancer victim: What kind of doctor are you? Person 2: I'm not a doctor. In fact, I'm a suicide bomber and am planning to initiate the detonation sequence right now. Cancer victim: Well, it doesn't really matter. No matter who shows up, I'll still die anyways. This way, I'll be able to pay a visit to the transcendent city high in the heavens sooner. Person 2: I bet that many would mourn your death at your remembrance ceremony. Cancer victim: That doesn't bother me. My friends and family are close to my heart, but that doesn't warrant eternal proximity with one another in itself. Person 2: Let's go to a better place. Let us finally break free of our mortal chains that have unceasingly been hindering our progress since the first war took place. Cancer victim: Wait, I've changed my mind! Person 2: Too late. I wish I had a time machine... not.

A black man and a hispanic man are riding in a car. Who's driving? The hispanic man

what do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Bob

Why did the chiken cross the road. Anwer: because it was being chased by a crazy horny/ kinky redneck.

penis

Two gay guys walked in to a bar. It's unfair of me to make the assumption that they're gay, they just be really good friends whom aren't opposed to touching each other.

A Woman out of the kitchen

Whats better than pizza? Pepperoni pizza, if you like pepperoni that is.

what has green paint and flies? a garbage truck

A man is sitting on a bench in a park crying a man walking by asks why he's crying, and the man answers that he has no idea why he's crying

What did the girl get for her birthday? Nothing...cause she died

Who is a nazi? • Theo Kingdom

Your mom is so...wonderful.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, She gave me AIDS, and I gave 'em to you! <3 <3

Knock Know Who's there Interrupting ghost Interu--BOO!!! Ha HA!

Ice cream You scream We all scream Because there is a murderer killing our friends

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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