What's the difference between difference and between? One is different and the other between.

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Two blondes are walking down the street. One breaks her left high heel and the other is called Monica.

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Q: What do you call a black person that flies planes? A: A pilot you racist

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these jokes are terrible, even for anti-jokes

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What did the japonese man say? Nothing that we can understand.

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Your momma's so ugly that she was worried that she would never marry anyone.

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what has green paint and flies? a garbage truck

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How do you get a plumber to cry? Kill his family

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What did the phone say to the telephone? I can't connect with you.

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Whats red and you can't see it? No Tomatoes

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Did you see that picture of Helen Keller's dad? Yes. She didn't.

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Knock, Knock The door's open

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The meme walks out of the bar.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Cheese.

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A mother and father heard their young son sobbing in his room, so they ran upstairs to see what the problem was. When they got to his room, they found the older son was dead and hanging from the ceiling. And the younger son was actually laughing, not crying.

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Why was Jenny walking home alone from school? Because three years ago her parents were murdered brutally by a drug dealer and social services haven't yet realised that Jenny is still living in the empty house.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because him and his girlfriend were in a bad relationship and he needed to get away for a while.

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What's worse than stepping on a lego? Being eaten alive by a man-sized spider.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, penis.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a terrorist.

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What do you call an arab flying a 747? A pliot.

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Why did Dumbledore fall off the astronomy tower? Because Snape killed him.

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Why was the Jewish man put to death? Because he was convicted by a jury of his peers in a fair trial overseen by a judge in good standing in a United States court for 12 counts of homicide

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Lol, listen, the suggestion lies in the "not not", you are using not twice in your mind, which under trance makes it so your subconcious registers that you are using a double negative while you consciously do not. Look back at the messages and register consciously that you and I have been using "not not" twice during the past messages, when the net shuts down here, you reinforce the "I will totally notnot, tell him" so the suggestion just gets stronger.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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