What's the difference between a Jew and a Pizza? A Jew is a person either born into or converted to Judaism, and a Pizza is a disc shaped, oven baked bread typically topped with tomato sauce and cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Knock Knock! Who's there? Your landlord. I'm here to collect rent

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why was school cancelled? Because the school was bombed.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Whats the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza is an inanimate object, while a black man is a person. racist F.u.c.k.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Wanna hear a joke? Good, go ask a comedian.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why does Jonny have a phobia birds? Because he has one glued to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what did the atheist get for Christmas? Nothing. If he was being truly honest to his beliefs, he wouldn't partake in a christian holiday.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

You're momma's so fat, she's got high cholesterol.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why is it hard to fool an aborted fetus? Because it wasn't born yesterday.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q:Ask me my name. A:What is your name? A:Hey why do you need to know that?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Want to hear a joke about Potassium? So do I.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer was arrested by the ASPCA and PETA for letting the chicken run free near a horribly busy road

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

why did the chicken cross the road? It is a domestic bird in the wild that is free to go where ever it wants to, that's why

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what is worse then stubbing your toe in the dark? -september 11th

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Knock Knock "Who's There?" *No answer* The man proceeds to go on with his life

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why was 15 afraid of 16? Coz 16 was bigger than him.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A man walks into a bar... and watches the Monday Night Football game with his pals.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the chiken cross the road. Anwer: because it was being chased by a crazy horny/ kinky redneck.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How did Helen Keller become blind and deaf? Scarlet fever or meningitis.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Repeatedly raped by her alcoholic, child molesting father.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops