Knock Knock. No one answered, as the person of residence was not home.

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Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Your landlord. I'm here to collect rent

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Q: what is more sad than being alone A: being alone with lots of cats

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What happens when you turn back time? You get "emit."

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What's the difference between a white man and a black man? Nothing. They are both created in God's image and likeness so get your mind outta the gutter!

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how many indians does it take to screw in a light bulb? one if it can reach 2 if it's high.One to screw in the bulb the other to hold the ladder.

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Your d*ck is short, If we compare it to mine. That was it, Thank you for your time.

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What rhymes with you? You.

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Q:What are black basketball players good at? A:Running,shooting and stealing.

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Q: Why did the man move out of his house? A: He found another, for a better price.

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"What's 'green', 'blue', and 'red' all over?" My color-blind friend said in confusion.

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What is colourful and explodes in the air. I don't know but it sounds cool!

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What's red and spins real fast? Not a dead baby in a blender, babies can't fit in there. Unless of course you dismember them. but that's obsurd. . . Kinda

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Two gay guys walked in to a bar. It's unfair of me to make the assumption that they're gay, they just be really good friends whom aren't opposed to touching each other.

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What did the priest do when he noticed the young boy bent over picking up crayons he had dropped? He helped him pick them up

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i love u. so rate me good or i will talk to my lawyer. nothing personal, i just have no arms, legs, or nose and got broken up with by a girlfriend yesterday (and no, she was not fake) Her name was maria. On the bright side, my grandma woke up this morning!

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a jew throwing a dime into a wishing well.

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What kind of animal eats and pisses on everything? Your mother. -Avery Vartanian

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What did the boy do when he was cold? He got a blanket.

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I have sex daily, I mean dyslexia.

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I got 99 problems... and an indeterminate number of them are bitches.

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Kid 1: "Want a Hurts Doughnut?" Kid 2: "Umm... sure." Kid 1 opens up a box of freshly baked Hurts doughnut from Hurts Bakery and gives one to kid 2

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what the hell happened to your face

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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