Why couldn't the old man play the piano? His arthritis caused him great pain.

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why do black people like to play basketball steal shoot and run

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Chuck Norris was walking down the street when he was confronted by an armed, very desperate street robber. Chuck unfortunately made the decision to defend himself, and was shot in the gut before he could complete a roundhouse kick. The robber then took his wallet and ran off, undoubtedly to buy drugs.

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A mother and father heard their young son sobbing in his room, so they ran upstairs to see what the problem was. When they got to his room, they found the older son was dead and hanging from the ceiling. And the younger son was actually laughing, not crying.

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Ow, there's an arrow in my knee!

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(insert antijoke here

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs on your porch? Matt.

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If thin people skinny dip, what do fat people do? Sink

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Person 1: Your Ugly Person 2: Your mom's ugly

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Knock, knock Who's there? Landlord; you've been evicted.

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When you are swimming across the ocean, and you lose your wheels, what's the difference between a duck? ... Because bananas have no bones.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?? Because it Died

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What do you call something you should prepare yourself for when having sex with a prostitute? A.I.D.S

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whats worse than ten dead babies in one trashcan? one dead baby in ten trashcans

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whats worse than getting beaten up by a bully? realizing your fly was down the whole time and getting beaten up by a bully

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You know whats funny? Things that aren't listed here.

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Q: why did the girl fall off the swing?? A: because she had no arms or legs.

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Q: What's the difference between an African American and a bench? A: An African American is a human being of black dissent, while a bench is an inanimate object that people sit on.

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Whats red and you can't see it? No Tomatoes

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knock knock Who's there? because 7 ate 9

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hey, can you answer a question for me? yeah, sure. ThankYou!

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither. The single celled amoeba. As billions of years passed, the simple amoeba began to form limbs which it utilized to crawl its way out of the ocean onto dry land. Millions of years would pass before the simplified organism began to develop into a fully functional chicken.

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Women's Rights

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Q: What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A: Cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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