What's black and white and red all over? And old fashioned television painted red.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Roses are red, violets are blue, why am i even talking to you?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

If your yacht is if moving at 50 knots per hour in a wind tunnel how many leprechauns can you fit in a chamber? Even, because purple is attracted to bestiality.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

2 guys walk into a bar, a third guy carefully ducks under it

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What is the best way to avoid wrinkles as you age? Moisturise with a good quality moisturiser, use high factor suncream on the face, get plenty of sleep, drink plenty of fluids, wear a hat and sunglasses and stay in the shade between 11am and 3pm, and try to eat a diet that is heart-healthy (for example, wholegrain, oily fish, and/or flax seed), as heart failure over a long time leads to sagging skin with a loss of elasticity.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Whats worse than falling down the stairs? Falling UP the stairs.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What's black and white and red all over. An interracial suicide pact.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What has two legs and graduated from ninja school? Okyrin Sakajuru. He also went on to win two all city titles and roundhouse kick of the day, performed on a wild tiger. As time passes, he stops practicing and becomes a lethargic street criminal. He is eventually captured by local authorities and charged with the robberies and two counts of aggravated assault. Leaving his children behind to the system where they are neglected and depressed about their fathers situation. He makes bail after 3 months and opens a strip club for dwarfs but loses it all after not finding stripper poles that are dwarf friendly.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Q. Why do Puerto Ricans throw their trash away in clear plastic bags? A. So Italians can go window shopping.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

I've got a boner

thumb_up thumb_down -62

What did the Catholic preist say to the altar boy? You've been a good altar boy.

thumb_up thumb_down -116

I Wish... I was Charlie Sheen's Dealer

thumb_up thumb_down +105

what does the pope have against homosexuals a whip

thumb_up thumb_down +79

Your mom is so...wonderful.

thumb_up thumb_down +65

What did the boy who succsesfully came out of liposection get? Diobeeties.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

In Soviet Russia, there are communists.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

how much wood could a wood chuck chuck? 3

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why was the blonde so stupid? He had dyslexia and to make fun of his hardship would truly be a hardship of human morals.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

hey, can you answer a question for me? yeah, sure. ThankYou!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Yo mamma is so pretty, she is frequently complimented on her good looks.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Caitlyn.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the women hit the telephone pole? There are many theories but one suggests that it is due to womens statistically lower cognitive spacial reasoning abilities.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did one muffin in the oven say to the other muffin Nothing food doesn't talk

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops