That moment when you and your friends throw snowballs at cars in the dark on the highway and the cops spotlight your area while you hide in a shed...

thumb_up thumb_down +152

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if I had sex with your mother?

thumb_up thumb_down +152

Patient: Doctor, will I be able to play the piano when my arm heals? Doctor: Did I not tell you? You insurance didn't cover the cost of this operation. Your arm is never going to be healed!

thumb_up thumb_down +82

What kind of cookies does a pedophile order from the girl scouts? Samoas...pedophiles love coconut.

thumb_up thumb_down +62

What's the difference between a gay white man and a gay black man? Nothing because they are both sexually attracted to men.

thumb_up thumb_down +60

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

your mommy so gehto shes black

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why was Jenny walking home alone from school? Because three years ago her parents were murdered brutally by a drug dealer and social services haven't yet realised that Jenny is still living in the empty house.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

here's a joke a black man goes in a store and buy something

thumb_up thumb_down +30

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face (pokerface)

thumb_up thumb_down +20

I like my woman like I like my coffee. Ground up and in the freezer.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A dog walks into a bar, looks at the bartender, lifts its leg and pisses on a bar stool. What does the bartender do ? He chases the dog out the bar and gets a mop to mop up the piss.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what did the hobo do when he saw timmy get hit by the bus and drop his ice cream? stole the ice cream and laughed

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Knock Knock Who's there? me oh

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A black man and a hispanic man are riding in a car. Who's driving? The hispanic man

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Knock, knock Who's there? Landlord; you've been evicted.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's black and white and red all over? And old fashioned television painted red.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What is the best way to avoid wrinkles as you age? Moisturise with a good quality moisturiser, use high factor suncream on the face, get plenty of sleep, drink plenty of fluids, wear a hat and sunglasses and stay in the shade between 11am and 3pm, and try to eat a diet that is heart-healthy (for example, wholegrain, oily fish, and/or flax seed), as heart failure over a long time leads to sagging skin with a loss of elasticity.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Duke: Hi Sally: Hello Duke: Nice weather huh? Sally: I couldn't tell ya duke, I'm not a meteorologist.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

whats the hardest part of roller skating. Telling your dad that you are gay.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

i was molested.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Do you know what's fun about having sex with twenty-seven year-olds? There are twenty of them.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops