What do you call a man with no arms or legs on your porch? Matt.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a terrorist -lschles

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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Did you see the picture of Helen Keller's father? No. Lemme Google it. Oh cool; he had a beard.

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You're momma's so fat, she's got high cholesterol.

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How do you stop a run-away bus? You sit down in the driver's seat and gently place your foot on the brake pedular and proceed to press it down. The brake pads, located in the calipers, will squeeze the brake discs and slow the bus eventually to stop at the crosswalk for the old lady accompanied by a young boy scout to cross the street and continue their wonderful lives.

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A dog walks into a bar, looks at the bartender, lifts its leg and pisses on a bar stool. What does the bartender do ? He chases the dog out the bar and gets a mop to mop up the piss.

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There was a Mexican in a bomb shop ?

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When life throws you lemons, duck because they freakin' hurt.

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how do you make a joke act like yourself

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Hey, where'd my tractor go?

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make me a sandwich!

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Q: What's the difference between an African American and a bench? A: An African American is a human being of black dissent, while a bench is an inanimate object that people sit on.

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What happens when you throw a cricket bat at a blonde? She is hurt and reports you to the police for anti-social behaviour.

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Q: What do a dildo salesman and a car salesman have in common? A: They are both salesman

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What do you call a woman with a penis? A Hermaphrodite.

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Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

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did you hear the one about the boyscout and his scoutmaster? They had a lovely relationship, and both went on to be role models.

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Q: why did Helen Keller's dog kill himself? A: Because he couldn't stand to see his owner suffer through blindness and deafness and being the butt of hundreds of offensive and hurtful jokes.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Your landlord. I'm here to collect rent

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What's worse than stepping on a lego? Being eaten alive by a man-sized spider.

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why did the girl smear penut butter on the road. To go with the trafic jam

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scottishman walk into a gay bar. And why shoudn't they.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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