What's the difference between me and a dead baby? I'm not dead, or a baby. I am well into my teens and very healthy.

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There was a Mexican in a bomb shop ?

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A man walks into a bar. It hurt.

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Why did Jack and Jill go up the hill? To get to their house.

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What did one muffin in the oven say to the other muffin Nothing food doesn't talk

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Why was Jim fired from his job at the sperm bank? Continual absenteeism and inconsistent work.

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Ask me how old my cat is. How old's your cat? I don't know.

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What's 6 inches long, held in your hand, and has a round tip? A pencil you pervert.

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Q: What's the difference between an African American and a bench? A: An African American is a human being of black dissent, while a bench is an inanimate object that people sit on.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? He said, "Where's my tractor?"

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Which came first, the chicken or the egg? It's a meaningless question because animals had been creating eggs for millions of years before chickens ever evolved.

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Q: why did the boy cross the road A: because he was being chased by a pedophile

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Q: What do a dildo salesman and a car salesman have in common? A: They are both salesman

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Why did the girl drop her lollipop? She got hit by a truck

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What does a mama bear on the pill have in common with the world series? No Cubs!

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did you hear the one about the boyscout and his scoutmaster? They had a lovely relationship, and both went on to be role models.

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What happens when you turn back time? You get "emit."

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a terrorist -lschles

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Did you see the picture of Helen Keller's father? No. Lemme Google it. Oh cool; he had a beard.

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what did the hobo do when he saw timmy get hit by the bus and drop his ice cream? stole the ice cream and laughed

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What black and blue and red all over? My mom after my dad comes back from the bar.

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A seal walks into a club...

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How do you kill a blond? You don't. If you do, you'll get reported to the cops and sent to jail.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops