Why did the girl buy wine? She was hosting a party for four of her closest friends.

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What did the Catholic preist say to the altar boy? You've been a good altar boy.

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What's the difference between a teacher and a train? A lot.

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What's 6 inches long, held in your hand, and has a round tip? A pencil you pervert.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first koala. Why did the man fall of his bike? He was struck with a falling koala. Why did the fish fall of its bike? Because it's a fish. What is fuzzy and might kill you if it falls on you? A pool table.

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What was the biggest turning point during Michael Vick's transformation from despised felon to MVP candidate? He stopped killing dogs.

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Which came first, the chicken or the egg? It's a meaningless question because animals had been creating eggs for millions of years before chickens ever evolved.

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Dislike this!!!!!!

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a Jew had a small nose

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Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

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What does a mama bear on the pill have in common with the world series? No Cubs!

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what the hell happened to your face

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What do you call a woman with a penis? A Hermaphrodite.

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What's black and not working? An old, broken piano.

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What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb? The lighbulb isn't also dying of terminal cancer.

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hey, can you answer a question for me? yeah, sure. ThankYou!

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You're momma's so fat, she's got high cholesterol.

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what did the hobo do when he saw timmy get hit by the bus and drop his ice cream? stole the ice cream and laughed

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What black and blue and red all over? My mom after my dad comes back from the bar.

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A man and his family walk into a talent agent's office. The man proceeds to sexually accost his wife and children. The agent calls security who escort the family out and helps the wife find a domestic violence shelter to stay at.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Someone else's cheese.

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what is worse then stubbing your toe in the dark? -september 11th

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A seal walks into a club...

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What's the difference between me and a dead baby? I'm not dead, or a baby. I am well into my teens and very healthy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops