What does a mama bear on the pill have in common with the world series? No Cubs!

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What's a bit smaller than the tallest man in the world? The 2nd tallest man in the world.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Women's Rights

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint

thumb_up thumb_down +17

An Irishman walks into a bar. He gets extremely drunk and gets hit by a train.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a terrorist -lschles

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the man punch his wife? Because he was angry

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How do you stop a run-away bus? You sit down in the driver's seat and gently place your foot on the brake pedular and proceed to press it down. The brake pads, located in the calipers, will squeeze the brake discs and slow the bus eventually to stop at the crosswalk for the old lady accompanied by a young boy scout to cross the street and continue their wonderful lives.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

what did the hobo do when he saw timmy get hit by the bus and drop his ice cream? stole the ice cream and laughed

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Ever since I've been using chloroform as cologne I've been getting laid a lot.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q: why are kittens so cute? A: because god created them that way. go fourth and enjoy kittens.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

There was a Mexican in a bomb shop ?

thumb_up thumb_down -5

When life throws you lemons, duck because they freakin' hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How did Helen Keller become blind and deaf? Scarlet fever or meningitis.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

make me a sandwich!

thumb_up thumb_down -67

What couldn't the Asian drive? Because he had just gotten laser eye surgery, and the doctor recommended that he didn't drive for a few days.

thumb_up thumb_down +132

what did the girl trapped in the fire say? help

thumb_up thumb_down +108

Why do black people eat watermelon? It is a good source of vitamin C.

thumb_up thumb_down +90

34

thumb_up thumb_down +62

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? He said, "Where's my tractor?"

thumb_up thumb_down +54

What happens when you throw a cricket bat at a blonde? She is hurt and reports you to the police for anti-social behaviour.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long face?". The horse doesn't reply because horse can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops