What kind of cookies does a pedophile order from the girl scouts? Samoas...pedophiles love coconut.

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What did the school bully get for his birthday? Beaten by his alcoholic father. Children are a product of their environment and his father's abusive nature towards his son forced the young boy to act out in class giving him the reputation of a bully.

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What did the doctor say to the Lawyer? I get paid more

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your mommy so gehto shes black

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hey, can you answer a question for me? yeah, sure. ThankYou!

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not Madeline McCann.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face (pokerface)

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I like my woman like I like my coffee. Ground up and in the freezer.

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff

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A dog walks into a bar, looks at the bartender, lifts its leg and pisses on a bar stool. What does the bartender do ? He chases the dog out the bar and gets a mop to mop up the piss.

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nick toth

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Caitlyn.

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A black man and a hispanic man are riding in a car. Who's driving? The hispanic man

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When you are swimming across the ocean, and you lose your wheels, what's the difference between a duck? ... Because bananas have no bones.

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What's white and moves at a glacial pace? A glacier.

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What is the best way to avoid wrinkles as you age? Moisturise with a good quality moisturiser, use high factor suncream on the face, get plenty of sleep, drink plenty of fluids, wear a hat and sunglasses and stay in the shade between 11am and 3pm, and try to eat a diet that is heart-healthy (for example, wholegrain, oily fish, and/or flax seed), as heart failure over a long time leads to sagging skin with a loss of elasticity.

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Why are you asleep? Because I'm tired.

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" The owner of the horse then explains the evolution of the species and genetics. The bartender, satisfied, serves the owner a drink and gladly gives the horse water.

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whats the hardest part of roller skating. Telling your dad that you are gay.

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whats worse than getting in a car crash Heroshema

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What's black and white and red all over. An interracial suicide pact.

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Q : Why was the little girl crying? A : Because she tripped and hurt her knee.

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a man cries out to god.... and god does't reply.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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