What's worse than stepping on a lego? Being eaten alive by a man-sized spider.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What do you call a Black guy picking cottnon? A cottonpicker

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

thumb_up thumb_down +18

It's easy to take part, just type your text below!

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A blonde walks into a salon and says "I would like to get my golden locks trimmed." The haircutter replies "surely, just sit yourself down in that chair over there and I'll be with you momentarily." The blonde walks to the chair and sits down. When the haircutter comes over he asks her, "would you please remove your headset, I can't cut your hair while they're on." She laughs at her forgetfulness and removes them obligingly.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

nick toth

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man walks into a bar. He has three drinks, then he leaves because he realizes he needs to get home because he has to get up early to go to his job in the morning.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's black and white and red all over? And old fashioned television painted red.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?? Because it Died

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the cactus cross the road? It was stuck to the chickens butt.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

whats worse than ten dead babies in one trashcan? one dead baby in ten trashcans

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Duke: Hi Sally: Hello Duke: Nice weather huh? Sally: I couldn't tell ya duke, I'm not a meteorologist.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

penis

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why are you asleep? Because I'm tired.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

whats the main reason Mexicans have legs? so they can stand.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the woman keep getting sexually harassed while calling for her lost dog? Her dog is named "Ilovedicks."

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Susie is 14 & she never listens to her mom, why is that? She's deaf.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

A horse walks into a bar.. Several people get up and leave as they see the potential danger in the situation..

thumb_up thumb_down -54

Which came first the egg or the chicken? The chicken because eggs can't cross the road

thumb_up thumb_down -76

Q: why did the girl fall off the swing?? A: because she had no arms or legs.

thumb_up thumb_down -196

A priest and a rabbi are playing golf one weekend. The priest tees off first. When the rabbi steps up to tee off, it begins to rain heavily. Dismayed, the rabbi says, "I thought it there was only a 10% chance of rain today."

thumb_up thumb_down +79

what do you call a black man flying a plane? a pilot you racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Why couldn't the old man play the piano? His arthritis caused him great pain.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Q: What do a dildo salesman and a car salesman have in common? A: They are both salesman

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops