why did the boy drop his ice cream? he tripped over his mother's dead body

what did the hobo do when he saw timmy get hit by the bus and drop his ice cream? stole the ice cream and laughed

Whats worse than the holocaust? A n a l

Did you hear about the guy who fell off the mountain? Oh, well he died

penis

Why did the aeroplane engine fallon the house? Because of Donnie Darko

What can be any colour and is made of leather? Cars. I lied about the leather part.

what is brown with wheels? a potatoe, i was just kidding about the wheels

What was the Alzheimer patient favorite drink? What was the Alzheimer patient favorite drink?

i love u. so rate me good or i will talk to my lawyer. nothing personal, i just have no arms, legs, or nose and got broken up with by a girlfriend yesterday (and no, she was not fake) Her name was maria. On the bright side, my grandma woke up this morning!

Why did the baby cross the road? cause it was stapled to the chicken.

(Q) Why did the little boy cross the road? (A) To get to the police officer. (Q) Why did the little boy need the police officer? (A) because he was raped.

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if I had sex with your mother?

What's the difference between a teacher and a train? A lot.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first koala. Why did the man fall of his bike? He was struck with a falling koala. Why did the fish fall of its bike? Because it's a fish. What is fuzzy and might kill you if it falls on you? A pool table.

Knock, Knock The door's open

What happens when you throw a cricket bat at a blonde? She is hurt and reports you to the police for anti-social behaviour.

What happened when a boy threw a ball at the wall? It hit him in the face

Why was the asian boy get straight A's? He paid attention during class, took good notes, studied at home, and had a personal drive that lead him to be a good student.

What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot

What did the man want a car for his birthday? 7.

Your mother is so dumb. It's a good thing she knows sign language.

My grandmother always use to tell me "slow and steady wins the race." Well, that was before she died in a house fire.

A blonde walks into a salon and says "I would like to get my golden locks trimmed." The haircutter replies "surely, just sit yourself down in that chair over there and I'll be with you momentarily." The blonde walks to the chair and sits down. When the haircutter comes over he asks her, "would you please remove your headset, I can't cut your hair while they're on." She laughs at her forgetfulness and removes them obligingly.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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