What runs faster than a nigger with a stolen tv? His brother with the remote

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Why did the fat man fall faster than the skinny man? He didn't. Masses does not affect the speed of falling objects. Everything with mass and volume falls with an acceleration of 9.81m/s^2 on Earth. Therefore the greater mass of the heavier man did not affect his falling speed. Both men fell at the same speed.

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Why did the aeroplane engine fallon the house? Because of Donnie Darko

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Why shouldnt you throw rocks at a black kid on a bike? Because the kid wasn't riding in your way, you could get arrested for assault and battery, and he probably lives in a low income area and cant afford health insurance if he was injured.

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What's funnier than House? Family Guy.

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Q: How did that man get two black eyes? A: He was born!

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Why was Jim fired from his job at the sperm bank? Continual absenteeism and inconsistent work.

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Why didn't the dog like baseball? Being a dog, it had no idea or interest in what baseball is.

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How do you get a plumber to cry? Kill his family

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Where do you put a black jew? In the back of the.... oh wait i have never seen a black jew before.

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Q: What's the difference between an African American and a bench? A: An African American is a human being of black dissent, while a bench is an inanimate object that people sit on.

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Your mom is so...wonderful.

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I like my coffee like i like my woman, Without a penis.

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What did the man want a car for his birthday? 7.

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint

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My grandmother always use to tell me "slow and steady wins the race." Well, that was before she died in a house fire.

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Why did the blonde kid lose the spelling bee? Because she misspelled a word.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Someone else's cheese.

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What did one muffin in the oven say to the other muffin Nothing food doesn't talk

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Butter. Butter who? Oh, um, sorry i forgot the rest...

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Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange. Aren't You Glad I Didn't Say Cliterus?

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I Wish... I was Charlie Sheen's Dealer

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Knock, Knock The door's open

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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