What did the woman say to her husband after he came home from a late night of drinking? Nothing, because the last time she did, she got her ass beat.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know why, but I was standing on the other side of the road and I took it home and mamed the chicken with a powerdrill.

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, She gave me AIDS, and I gave 'em to you! <3 <3

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you know what they say... hydrate or die

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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What did the nintendo Wii say as it went down the slide? They don't talk.

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why did the chicken cross the road? It is a domestic bird in the wild that is free to go where ever it wants to, that's why

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A dog walks into a bar, looks at the bartender, lifts its leg and pisses on a bar stool. What does the bartender do ? He chases the dog out the bar and gets a mop to mop up the piss.

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How do you kill a blond? You don't. If you do, you'll get reported to the cops and sent to jail.

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There was a Mexican in a bomb shop ?

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Q: Why did the man move out of his house? A: He found another, for a better price.

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56

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What's worse than women's rights? Actually, not much, because women throughout history suffered for too long the hardships of over dominant male figures and deserve the freedoms they have achieved today.

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Why was Jim fired from his job at the sperm bank? Continual absenteeism and inconsistent work.

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What did the republican say to the democrat? You suck!

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What's the difference between mw2 and mw3? Nothing

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How come the black man couldn't be seen on film? He could be seen on film, he's not a vampire.

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What couldn't the Asian drive? Because he had just gotten laser eye surgery, and the doctor recommended that he didn't drive for a few days.

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Roses are der, Violets are lube, I am dyslexic.

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someone called a frog a frog

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I Wish... I was Charlie Sheen's Dealer

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A man walked into a bar and said ow.

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Jon has 40 chololate bars, he eats 32, what does he have now? Diabetes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops