Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first koala. Why did the man fall of his bike? He was struck with a falling koala. Why did the fish fall of its bike? Because it's a fish. What is fuzzy and might kill you if it falls on you? A pool table.

I got 99 problems... and an indeterminate number of them are bitches.

Why did the girl drop her lollipop? She got hit by a truck

Knock knock Who's there? Labrinth Come in

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint

What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb? The lighbulb isn't also dying of terminal cancer.

An Irishman walks into a bar. He gets extremely drunk and gets hit by a train.

How did the square become a circle? Due to the period of recession in our nation, it was found necessary to cut corners.

Oxygen and magnesium are going out OMG Think science the you might get it If not O oxygen mg magnesium

A Man goes into a watch store. Why? To buy a watch

Why did the fat man fall faster than the skinny man? He didn't. Masses does not affect the speed of falling objects. Everything with mass and volume falls with an acceleration of 9.81m/s^2 on Earth. Therefore the greater mass of the heavier man did not affect his falling speed. Both men fell at the same speed.

Why did Jack and Jill go up the hill? To get to their house.

How did Helen Keller become blind and deaf? Scarlet fever or meningitis.

these jokes are terrible, even for anti-jokes

what smells like red paint but is blue paint?

A man walks into a bar He says ouch

What kind of animal eats and pisses on everything? Your mother. -Avery Vartanian

How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? He said, "Where's my tractor?"

Which came first, the chicken or the egg? It's a meaningless question because animals had been creating eggs for millions of years before chickens ever evolved.

What did the doctor say to the Lawyer? I get paid more

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know why, but I was standing on the other side of the road and I took it home and mamed the chicken with a powerdrill.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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