What's red and spins real fast? Not a dead baby in a blender, babies can't fit in there. Unless of course you dismember them. but that's obsurd. . . Kinda

Why was Jim fired from his job at the sperm bank? Continual absenteeism and inconsistent work.

i love u. so rate me good or i will talk to my lawyer. nothing personal, i just have no arms, legs, or nose and got broken up with by a girlfriend yesterday (and no, she was not fake) Her name was maria. On the bright side, my grandma woke up this morning!

What's the difference between a teacher and a train? A lot.

How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One

Your mom smells so bad that she proceeded to take a shower and then didnt smell bad at all.

Knock knock Who's there? Labrinth Come in

What's a bit smaller than the tallest man in the world? The 2nd tallest man in the world.

You just threw a fireman and a baby out of a skyscraper... who arrived earth first? Adam and Eve. Moral: Because theology is bullshit.

What do you call a woman with a penis? A Hermaphrodite.

whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff

Q: What did my uncle Tom say when he first encountered my friend Richard Jefferson? A: Hello

Why shouldnt you throw rocks at a black kid on a bike? Because the kid wasn't riding in your way, you could get arrested for assault and battery, and he probably lives in a low income area and cant afford health insurance if he was injured.

Why did the aeroplane engine fallon the house? Because of Donnie Darko

What is colourful and explodes in the air. I don't know but it sounds cool!

"What's 'green', 'blue', and 'red' all over?" My color-blind friend said in confusion.

Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Give a man a gun and he'll build you a refrigerator.

Where do you put a black jew? In the back of the.... oh wait i have never seen a black jew before.

Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange. Aren't You Glad I Didn't Say Cliterus?

Why do black people eat watermelon? It is a good source of vitamin C.

What did the doctor say to the Lawyer? I get paid more

why didnt the chicken cross the road? he did cross the road

Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

What's worse than one bee sting? 2 bee stings

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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