Two blondes are walking down the street. One breaks her left high heel and the other is called Monica.

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Q:What are black basketball players good at? A:Running,shooting and stealing.

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Q: Why did the man move out of his house? A: He found another, for a better price.

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penis

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what smells like red paint but is blue paint?

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What's the difference between mw2 and mw3? Nothing

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someone called a frog a frog

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what's blue and white and red all over? -nothing the "red all over" part implies a contradiction to blue and white.

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Knock Knock. Martha, get the door I'm watching the game!

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What happens when you turn back time? You get "emit."

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hey, can you answer a question for me? yeah, sure. ThankYou!

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An Irishman walks into a bar. He gets extremely drunk and gets hit by a train.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs on your porch? Matt.

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A man walked into a bar. "Ouch"

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What do you call a donkey walking backwards a confused donkey

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There was an old lady from Ealing Who had a peculiar feeling She lay on her back Opened her crack And pissed all over the ceiling The old lady then lay in her own waste for over two weeks due to neglect by uncaring nursing home staff. Six months later, a hidden camera documentary on underperforming care homes exposed the abuse and neglect and the old lady went to live with her son and his family. In the early hours of May 14th 2011, the whole family were killed in a house fire that gutted the home and saw fires spread to neighbouring houses. Firefighters say the blaze originated in the spare room and was caused by exposed wiring on an electrical blanket. Forensic experts said that the repeated urination on the blanket would likely corrode the wiring due to the acidic content of urine.

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What's funnier than House? Family Guy.

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"What's 'green', 'blue', and 'red' all over?" My color-blind friend said in confusion.

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Why was the man angry? Because I slept with his wife.

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A quadrapeldgic walks no where

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Why did the girl buy wine? She was hosting a party for four of her closest friends.

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How do you get a plumber to cry? Kill his family

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How come the black man couldn't be seen on film? He could be seen on film, he's not a vampire.

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(Q) Why did the little boy cross the road? (A) To get to the police officer. (Q) Why did the little boy need the police officer? (A) because he was raped.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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