Why couldn't the old man play the piano? His arthritis caused him great pain.

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here's a joke a black man goes in a store and buy something

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Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

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Ow, there's an arrow in my knee!

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Your landlord. I'm here to collect rent

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not Madeline McCann.

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An Irishman walks into a bar. He gets extremely drunk and gets hit by a train.

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what did micheal jackson give to a young boy? -nothing micheal jackson is dead

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You're momma's so fat, she's got high cholesterol.

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How could they tell Michael Jackson was dead? He showed no vital signs.

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what did the hobo do when he saw timmy get hit by the bus and drop his ice cream? stole the ice cream and laughed

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Edward and Bella looked at each other. Then they both died. Oh, and Jacob is actually a transvestite.

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Girls go to college to get more knowledge. Boys go to Jupiter because they're already smart enough to achieve interplanetary space travel.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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Q:What are black basketball players good at? A:Running,shooting and stealing.

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Q: Why did the man move out of his house? A: He found another, for a better price.

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There was an old lady from Ealing Who had a peculiar feeling She lay on her back Opened her crack And pissed all over the ceiling The old lady then lay in her own waste for over two weeks due to neglect by uncaring nursing home staff. Six months later, a hidden camera documentary on underperforming care homes exposed the abuse and neglect and the old lady went to live with her son and his family. In the early hours of May 14th 2011, the whole family were killed in a house fire that gutted the home and saw fires spread to neighbouring houses. Firefighters say the blaze originated in the spare room and was caused by exposed wiring on an electrical blanket. Forensic experts said that the repeated urination on the blanket would likely corrode the wiring due to the acidic content of urine.

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"What's 'green', 'blue', and 'red' all over?" My color-blind friend said in confusion.

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penis

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What has two legs and graduated from ninja school? Okyrin Sakajuru. He also went on to win two all city titles and roundhouse kick of the day, performed on a wild tiger. As time passes, he stops practicing and becomes a lethargic street criminal. He is eventually captured by local authorities and charged with the robberies and two counts of aggravated assault. Leaving his children behind to the system where they are neglected and depressed about their fathers situation. He makes bail after 3 months and opens a strip club for dwarfs but loses it all after not finding stripper poles that are dwarf friendly.

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Why was the man angry? Because I slept with his wife.

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what smells like red paint but is blue paint?

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What's the difference between mw2 and mw3? Nothing

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someone called a frog a frog

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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