What did the man say to the attractive female bartender as he left the bar? Well, it's been fun but I hate you so I'm leaving to kill your entire family.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

hey, can you answer a question for me? yeah, sure. ThankYou!

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Oxygen and magnesium are going out OMG Think science the you might get it If not O oxygen mg magnesium

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

An Irishman walks into a bar. He gets extremely drunk and gets hit by a train.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A man walked in a bar had 4 drinks and walked home because drunk driving is dangerous

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's red and green and goes 100 mph? A car that is driving recklessly and happens to have a Christmas paint scheme.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Roses are red, violets are blue, why am i even talking to you?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What runs faster than a nigger with a stolen tv? His brother with the remote

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q:What are black basketball players good at? A:Running,shooting and stealing.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the aeroplane engine fallon the house? Because of Donnie Darko

thumb_up thumb_down -19

3 men find a genie lamp on the side of a road, The genie grants them each a wish as they surely deserve. The first man asks for a jet and the genie glady grants him this and the man starts to fly away. The second man says to make a wall around asia and the genie complies. The third man thinks for a minute and finally says fill it with water and as a genie the genie cannot refuse. They all drowned seeing how the jet had no fuel. The genie goes back to sleep and is picked up by an alien 5,000 years in the future, the Earth is destroyed in 7012(as if we didnt already destroy it). The genie survives and currently resides on uranus.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q: What did the priest say to the rabbi? A: Our God is a wonderful, loving god; praise his name.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the girl buy wine? She was hosting a party for four of her closest friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -69

What's the difference between a teacher and a train? A lot.

thumb_up thumb_down +106

Did you see that picture of Helen Keller's dad? Yes. She didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

here's a joke a black man goes in a store and buy something

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What's the difference between a rabbit and a plum? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a terrorist.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

John had 32 candy bars. He ate 28 of them. What does John have now? daibetes, john has diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why is it hard to fool an aborted fetus? Because it wasn't born yesterday.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A black man and a hispanic man are riding in a car. Who's driving? The hispanic man

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: Why did the man move out of his house? A: He found another, for a better price.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops