Why did the aeroplane engine fallon the house? Because of Donnie Darko

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3 men find a genie lamp on the side of a road, The genie grants them each a wish as they surely deserve. The first man asks for a jet and the genie glady grants him this and the man starts to fly away. The second man says to make a wall around asia and the genie complies. The third man thinks for a minute and finally says fill it with water and as a genie the genie cannot refuse. They all drowned seeing how the jet had no fuel. The genie goes back to sleep and is picked up by an alien 5,000 years in the future, the Earth is destroyed in 7012(as if we didnt already destroy it). The genie survives and currently resides on uranus.

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Q: What did the priest say to the rabbi? A: Our God is a wonderful, loving god; praise his name.

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Why was Jim fired from his job at the sperm bank? Continual absenteeism and inconsistent work.

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Q: What's the difference between an African American and a bench? A: An African American is a human being of black dissent, while a bench is an inanimate object that people sit on.

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Did you see that picture of Helen Keller's dad? Yes. She didn't.

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You just threw a fireman and a baby out of a skyscraper... who arrived earth first? Adam and Eve. Moral: Because theology is bullshit.

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hey, can you answer a question for me? yeah, sure. ThankYou!

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a terrorist.

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John had 32 candy bars. He ate 28 of them. What does John have now? daibetes, john has diabetes.

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Oxygen and magnesium are going out OMG Think science the you might get it If not O oxygen mg magnesium

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Why is it hard to fool an aborted fetus? Because it wasn't born yesterday.

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A black man and a hispanic man are riding in a car. Who's driving? The hispanic man

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Q: Why did the man move out of his house? A: He found another, for a better price.

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What runs faster than a nigger with a stolen tv? His brother with the remote

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Hey, where'd my tractor go?

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What happens when a japanese boy goes into a planet called Zypharecion which is 2000 light years away with 20% oxygen and 78% nitrogen and 2% of other earthly air elements and heats up a balloon enough that it explodes? He wont be at that planet because it does not exist and travelling at the speed of light has not been proven possible for humans.

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A quadrapeldgic walks no where

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Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Give a man a gun and he'll build you a refrigerator.

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I just lost the game where if you think about the game then you lose the game. so did you.

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if I had sex with your mother?

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What couldn't the Asian drive? Because he had just gotten laser eye surgery, and the doctor recommended that he didn't drive for a few days.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first koala. Why did the man fall of his bike? He was struck with a falling koala. Why did the fish fall of its bike? Because it's a fish. What is fuzzy and might kill you if it falls on you? A pool table.

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What happens when you throw a cricket bat at a blonde? She is hurt and reports you to the police for anti-social behaviour.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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