Ever since I've been using chloroform as cologne I've been getting laid a lot.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Edward and Bella looked at each other. Then they both died. Oh, and Jacob is actually a transvestite.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A woman got in her car to drive to work. She kept her hands on the wheel and eyes on the road and was able to avoid any accidents that could have occurred.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How do you kill a blond? You don't. If you do, you'll get reported to the cops and sent to jail.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A seal walks into a club...

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What couldn't the stereotypical pirate get into the movie? Well, considering that the stereotypical pirate existed in the sixteenth to eightteenth centuries and the first motion picture wasn't made until the mid to late nineteenth century, also the technology for time travel does not exist nor has it ever, I would have to derive that he was not let in due to the fact that there was no way for him to ever exist at the same time that a movie would have been playing.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

why do holocasut jokes make us laugh? i dont know you tell me

thumb_up thumb_down -39

What was the Alzheimer patient favorite drink? What was the Alzheimer patient favorite drink?

thumb_up thumb_down -55

What's the difference between mw2 and mw3? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -79

What couldn't the Asian drive? Because he had just gotten laser eye surgery, and the doctor recommended that he didn't drive for a few days.

thumb_up thumb_down +132

Ask me how old my cat is. How old's your cat? I don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down +108

Who is a nazi? • Theo Kingdom

thumb_up thumb_down +104

What kind of animal eats and pisses on everything? Your mother. -Avery Vartanian

thumb_up thumb_down +98

I Wish... I was Charlie Sheen's Dealer

thumb_up thumb_down +98

A man walked into a bar and said ow.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

Q: why did the boy cross the road A: because he was being chased by a pedophile

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long face?". The horse doesn't reply because horse can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Ow, there's an arrow in my knee!

thumb_up thumb_down +28

An Irishman walks into a bar. He gets extremely drunk and gets hit by a train.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A man walks into a bar. He has three drinks, then he leaves because he realizes he needs to get home because he has to get up early to go to his job in the morning.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How did the square become a circle? Due to the period of recession in our nation, it was found necessary to cut corners.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call a man with no arms or legs on your porch? Matt.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a terrorist -lschles

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops