An Irishman walks into a bar. He gets extremely drunk and gets hit by a train.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs on your porch? Matt.

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What do you call something that comes out of a llama's butt? poop

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why is six afraid of seven? because seven ate nine

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How do you kill a blond? You don't. If you do, you'll get reported to the cops and sent to jail.

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Why did Jack and Jill go up the hill? To get to their house.

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Wanna hear a joke? Sure. Too bad I don't have one.

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Where do bananas come from? Mexico

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26.5% of Americans are obese.

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What has two legs and graduated from ninja school? Okyrin Sakajuru. He also went on to win two all city titles and roundhouse kick of the day, performed on a wild tiger. As time passes, he stops practicing and becomes a lethargic street criminal. He is eventually captured by local authorities and charged with the robberies and two counts of aggravated assault. Leaving his children behind to the system where they are neglected and depressed about their fathers situation. He makes bail after 3 months and opens a strip club for dwarfs but loses it all after not finding stripper poles that are dwarf friendly.

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Why did the girl buy wine? She was hosting a party for four of her closest friends.

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What's 6 inches long, held in your hand, and has a round tip? A pencil you pervert.

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What's the biggest difference between the East and West Coast? About 3,000 miles.

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Which came first, the chicken or the egg? It's a meaningless question because animals had been creating eggs for millions of years before chickens ever evolved.

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Dislike this!!!!!!

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Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

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What does a mama bear on the pill have in common with the world series? No Cubs!

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What's a bit smaller than the tallest man in the world? The 2nd tallest man in the world.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Your landlord. I'm here to collect rent

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What do you call a woman with a penis? A Hermaphrodite.

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What's black and not working? An old, broken piano.

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What happens when you turn back time? You get "emit."

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hey, can you answer a question for me? yeah, sure. ThankYou!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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