i love u. so rate me good or i will talk to my lawyer. nothing personal, i just have no arms, legs, or nose and got broken up with by a girlfriend yesterday (and no, she was not fake) Her name was maria. On the bright side, my grandma woke up this morning!

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first koala. Why did the man fall of his bike? He was struck with a falling koala. Why did the fish fall of its bike? Because it's a fish. What is fuzzy and might kill you if it falls on you? A pool table.

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Your mom smells so bad that she proceeded to take a shower and then didnt smell bad at all.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know why, but I was standing on the other side of the road and I took it home and mamed the chicken with a powerdrill.

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An alcoholic walks into a bar. He is destroying his family.

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What did the doctor say to the Lawyer? I get paid more

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What did the boy who succsesfully came out of liposection get? Diobeeties.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Your landlord. I'm here to collect rent

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You just threw a fireman and a baby out of a skyscraper... who arrived earth first? Adam and Eve. Moral: Because theology is bullshit.

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hey, can you answer a question for me? yeah, sure. ThankYou!

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Oxygen and magnesium are going out OMG Think science the you might get it If not O oxygen mg magnesium

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a terrorist -lschles

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A man walks into a bar. He has three drinks, then he leaves because he realizes he needs to get home because he has to get up early to go to his job in the morning.

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There are 3 type of people in the world. People who can count, and people who can't.

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Two blondes are walking down the street. One breaks her left high heel and the other is called Monica.

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Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange. Aren't You Glad I Didn't Say Cliterus?

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Why did the baby cross the road? cause it was stapled to the chicken.

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if I had sex with your mother?

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Why do black people eat watermelon? It is a good source of vitamin C.

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What did the little crippled boy get for his birthday? He's an orphan so he doesn't know his birthday.

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What happens when you throw a cricket bat at a blonde? She is hurt and reports you to the police for anti-social behaviour.

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What did the woman say to her husband after he came home from a late night of drinking? Nothing, because the last time she did, she got her ass beat.

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Knock knock Who's there? Labrinth Come in

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I got 99 problems... and an indeterminate number of them are bitches.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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