What's the biggest difference between the East and West Coast? About 3,000 miles.

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a Jew had a small nose

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Did you hear about the kidnapping yesterday? He slept for at least 3 hours.

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Q: why did the boy cross the road A: because he was being chased by a pedophile

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An alcoholic walks into a bar. He is destroying his family.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Your landlord. I'm here to collect rent

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What's black and not working? An old, broken piano.

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what did micheal jackson give to a young boy? -nothing micheal jackson is dead

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A man walked in a bar had 4 drinks and walked home because drunk driving is dangerous

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A man and his family walk into a talent agent's office. The man proceeds to sexually accost his wife and children. The agent calls security who escort the family out and helps the wife find a domestic violence shelter to stay at.

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Why did Jack and Jill go up the hill? To get to their house.

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Two blondes are walking down the street. One breaks her left high heel and the other is called Monica.

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What couldn't the stereotypical pirate get into the movie? Well, considering that the stereotypical pirate existed in the sixteenth to eightteenth centuries and the first motion picture wasn't made until the mid to late nineteenth century, also the technology for time travel does not exist nor has it ever, I would have to derive that he was not let in due to the fact that there was no way for him to ever exist at the same time that a movie would have been playing.

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A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender for 4 beers. The bartender replies, "One at a time, mate, will that work for you?" To which the man replies, "No", leaves, and drives his 1994 Toyota Corolla off of the road into the pit of a volcano.

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Three nuns accidentally walked in to a bar and so they immediately went out.

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How come the black man couldn't be seen on film? He could be seen on film, he's not a vampire.

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Who is a nazi? • Theo Kingdom

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Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

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I got 99 problems... and an indeterminate number of them are bitches.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Zebras.

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Kid 1: "Want a Hurts Doughnut?" Kid 2: "Umm... sure." Kid 1 opens up a box of freshly baked Hurts doughnut from Hurts Bakery and gives one to kid 2

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What does a mama bear on the pill have in common with the world series? No Cubs!

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What's a bit smaller than the tallest man in the world? The 2nd tallest man in the world.

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Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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