Why did the fat man fall faster than the skinny man? He didn't. Masses does not affect the speed of falling objects. Everything with mass and volume falls with an acceleration of 9.81m/s^2 on Earth. Therefore the greater mass of the heavier man did not affect his falling speed. Both men fell at the same speed.

Why did Jack and Jill go up the hill? To get to their house.

What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Hey, where'd my tractor go?

How did Helen Keller become blind and deaf? Scarlet fever or meningitis.

make me a sandwich!

What's the difference between mw2 and mw3? Nothing

A man walks into a bar He says ouch

What kind of animal eats and pisses on everything? Your mother. -Avery Vartanian

How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first koala. Why did the man fall of his bike? He was struck with a falling koala. Why did the fish fall of its bike? Because it's a fish. What is fuzzy and might kill you if it falls on you? A pool table.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

What do you call a retarded man? Mentally challenged.

Which came first, the chicken or the egg? It's a meaningless question because animals had been creating eggs for millions of years before chickens ever evolved.

What did the woman say to her husband after he came home from a late night of drinking? Nothing, because the last time she did, she got her ass beat.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know why, but I was standing on the other side of the road and I took it home and mamed the chicken with a powerdrill.

why was the little girl crying? because her dad hit her.

What's the difference between a rabbit and a plum? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

Knock knock. Who's there? Your neighbor.

Why did the man punch his wife? Because he was angry

Oxygen and magnesium are going out OMG Think science the you might get it If not O oxygen mg magnesium

A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender for 4 beers. The bartender replies, "One at a time, mate, will that work for you?" To which the man replies, "No", leaves, and drives his 1994 Toyota Corolla off of the road into the pit of a volcano.

What did one muffin in the oven say to the other muffin Nothing food doesn't talk

26.5% of Americans are obese.

these jokes are terrible, even for anti-jokes

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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