Whats he best type of terroist? A dead one.

Two gay guys walked in to a bar. It's unfair of me to make the assumption that they're gay, they just be really good friends whom aren't opposed to touching each other.

How do you kill a blonde? A gun, knife, there are a number of ways really...

What did the grass say to the human "Hey" The human then screams and runs to safety

What a vase and a cheeseburger have in common? It has it's price.

What did the English teacher write on a sheet of assignment criteria? The assignment criteria. Plus, she spelled "millennium" wrong.

Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

So a Jewish man walks into a bar, You think Jesus being all knowing would have realized it was there.

(Q) Why did the little boy cross the road? (A) To get to the police officer. (Q) Why did the little boy need the police officer? (A) because he was raped.

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

Have you heard of Helen Keller's dog? No. Neither has she

A priest and a rabbi are playing golf one weekend. The priest tees off first. When the rabbi steps up to tee off, it begins to rain heavily. Dismayed, the rabbi says, "I thought it there was only a 10% chance of rain today."

What did the small baby faucet say to the daddy faucet? Nothing, they are inanimate objects and cannot talk.

What did he hellen keller say to her dad ? Nothing she cant talk

Are you from Tennessee? cuz i wanna makeout with your face.

person 1 - what's big, green and ugly? person 2 - don't know. what's big, green and ugly? person 1 - nothing is

Why did the priest touch the little boy? To Baptise him.

a:two guys are white but one of the guys can only see black and white so he said dude you black he said no so they have a race who won :nobody they both got hit by a bus then a car then a donkey eaea then a horse

Why did the chicken cross the road? know on knows as he can't talk

You walk in to your room. 7 chickens on your bed.

A man walks into a bar. It hurt.

A mother and father heard their young son sobbing in his room, so they ran upstairs to see what the problem was. When they got to his room, they found the older son was dead and hanging from the ceiling. And the younger son was actually laughing, not crying.

Women's Rights

what is the difference between a Ferrari and a bucket of dead babies......... I dont have a Ferrari in my garage

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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