A man walks into a bar, he is immediately rushed to the emergency room

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have cancer."

What do you call a horse with no eyes? A horse with no eyes.

I got 99 problems... and an indeterminate number of them are bitches.

Two people on a boat, Pete and Repete. Pete fell off and Repete radioed the Coast Guard, who sadly got there just in time to watch him drown to his death.

Yo mama is so fat that it is obvious obesity runs in the family.

How do you make a small fortune? Be financially smart, work hard, save money, all while you make sure you don't let your earnings become a "large" fortune.

Why did Windows crash ? F*ck Windows, that's why.

poo poo you you doo doo too too

Q:Ask me my name. A:What is your name? A:Hey why do you need to know that?

what do you call a grown man driving a plane you dont it isnt possible to drive a plane

What's green and invisible? This cabbage

Did you hear about the blonde who jumped out off a bridge? She was clinically depressed and took her own life because of her terribly low self-esteem.

what's funnier than a dead baby in a clown costume? philanthropy

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

why can't a blonde count to 70? cause 69 is a mouth full

you: knock knock person: who's there you: interrupting cow person: interrupting cow you:MOOOOOOOOO

A man walks into a bar... ouch. He received a minor concussion from the impact of the cement wall, and a slight goose egg on his forehead.

Someone thinks Justin Bieber is strait

Obama.

If your yacht is if moving at 50 knots per hour in a wind tunnel how many leprechauns can you fit in a chamber? Even, because purple is attracted to bestiality.

Why didn't andrea clean the dishes? She had no hands

Why did the girls head explode while eating supper? There was a grenade in her food.

A white man and a black man are standing on the edge of a 20 story building. The view from up there is rather nice.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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