What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb? The lighbulb isn't also dying of terminal cancer.

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Why did Dumbledore fall off the astronomy tower? Because Snape killed him.

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What is marios favorite type of jeans? a brand that he enjoys and feels is comfortable in

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Why mommy upset cause wet and sticky make mommy upset

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How long does it take a black woman to take a shit? Why in the world would you want to know something like that? But anyway, the answer is somewhere, on average, between 10 seconds and 15 minutes. It really varies and conditions like irritable bowel syndrome and constipation affect this range. Actually it takes about 9 months.

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Gravitational force acted upon the monkey who was not holding on to any branch.

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An English man a Scotts man and an Irish man buy a helicopter between them,they go to pick it up after paying for it and realise that non of them can fly it. so they get a refund and go to the pub.

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Why did the girls head explode while eating supper? There was a grenade in her food.

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whats the hardest part of roller skating. Telling your dad that you are gay.

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Whats the difference between and anti joke and a joke? There two different things.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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What is the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry Potter escapes the chamber.

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Whats Obama's last name?

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Why do black people eat watermelon? It is a good source of vitamin C.

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What did the lawyer get for Christmas? More paper work

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven ate nine.

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot, you racist!

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Why is it hard to fool an aborted fetus? Because it wasn't born yesterday.

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Geuss what? Bob is wide awake and he likes strawberries but he didn't have any strawberries so he ate a hamburger but fred wanted a hamburger but bob ate it so he just ate bob but bob was wide awake so he saw fred eating him so he called the pigs to come and eat fred because pigs eat anything but the pigs had already eaten their daily freds so they ate bob because they hadn't already eaten their daily bob but fred had already eaten bob so they got angry at fred so they just ate him anyway but then they got fat so a wolf ate them but then some hunters killed the wolf and ate it so they are actually eating a hamburger because the wolf ate the pigs and the pigs ate fred and fred ate bob and bobb ate a hambuger but he actually likes strawberries.

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Q:Ask me my name. A:What is your name? A:Hey why do you need to know that?

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what do you call a grown man driving a plane you dont it isnt possible to drive a plane

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Q: What did the diddler say to the little boy? A: Can i touch you inappropriately?

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Someone thinks Justin Bieber is strait

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?? Because it Died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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