What's white and cant jump? A Fridge

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"I can't wait to eat this bagle!" "Yes you can." "Yeah, I guess you're right."

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Person 1: Your Ugly Person 2: Your mom's ugly

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One day a horse goes to a bakery store and asks the shopkeeper for a fresh loaf of bread. Surprised at the request the shopkeeper asked - White bread or whole wheat? To which the horse replied - Makes no difference cause i rode my bicycle to work yesterday.

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What do you call something you should prepare yourself for when having sex with a prostitute? A.I.D.S

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Why did the girls head explode while eating supper? There was a grenade in her food.

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how do you wake lady gaga up? you hit her in the face with a frying pan

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whats the hardest part of roller skating. Telling your dad that you are gay.

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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What did one muffin in the oven say to the other muffin Nothing food doesn't talk

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umm idk what joke to write down so yea and so rate this a thumbs up! okay bc this is an awesome joke...right right right yea ik!

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What do you call a Mexican jumping fences? A really good athlete.

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What did the lawyer get for Christmas? More paper work

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What happened to the blonde that died her hair brown? Her hair turned brown.

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did you hear the one about the boyscout and his scoutmaster? They had a lovely relationship, and both went on to be role models.

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Chuck Norris was walking down the street when he was confronted by an armed, very desperate street robber. Chuck unfortunately made the decision to defend himself, and was shot in the gut before he could complete a roundhouse kick. The robber then took his wallet and ran off, undoubtedly to buy drugs.

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Why do immigrants move to the UK? To seek a better life

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What's worse than stepping on a lego? Being eaten alive by a man-sized spider.

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240

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Q: What comes after 8? A: 9

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Why didn't the African kid eat lunch? He wasn't hungry.

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nick toth

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A man walks into a bar. He has three drinks, then he leaves because he realizes he needs to get home because he has to get up early to go to his job in the morning.

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A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: I guess nobody's home. (leaves.)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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