how much wood could a wood chuck chuck? 3

speacking of cheese... steve jobs died

A negro named Kanye walks into a Tavern... He's stoned to death.

Sometimes I light my hair on fire and pretend I'm a candle.

Q: What did the pope say to the prostitute he passed in the street? A: Bath & Bodyworks are having a sale

The joke above me is a wind-up, losers :P

Q:Ask me my name. A:What is your name? A:Hey why do you need to know that?

A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: I guess nobody's home. (leaves.)

Whats the difference between a circle and a peace sign? Three lines!

what's funnier than a dead baby in a clown costume? philanthropy

A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

What's worst than getting glass stuck in your foot? Rubbing lotion on a fork.

Obama.

I hope you take your own wise words to heart Nero, how would you like to claim to be me and get our ship somewhat on land before it all goes to pieces? After all I have been claiming to be you for a long long time.

Why did the girl fall off the couch? She had a seizure.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple.

How do you get a plumber to cry? Kill his family

A man walks into a bar, he is immediately rushed to the emergency room

What do you call a Mexican jumping fences? A really good athlete.

Why didn't Tommy walk to school? 'Cause he was in a wheelchair..

All I want for Chrismas, the murderer of my parents to be caught.

What makes women so mystifying and beautiful? Tits.

If you lose your left arm, your right one will be left.

That's a lie, buffaloes are extinct now

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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