Oxygen and magnesium are going out OMG Think science the you might get it If not O oxygen mg magnesium

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs swimming? Drowning.

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Edward and Bella looked at each other. Then they both died. Oh, and Jacob is actually a transvestite.

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What happens when a japanese boy goes into a planet called Zypharecion which is 2000 light years away with 20% oxygen and 78% nitrogen and 2% of other earthly air elements and heats up a balloon enough that it explodes? He wont be at that planet because it does not exist and travelling at the speed of light has not been proven possible for humans.

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whats the main reason Mexicans have legs? so they can stand.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because he lives in a chicken coop and has never even seen a road.

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make me a sandwich!

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A man is sitting on a bench in a park crying a man walking by asks why he's crying, and the man answers that he has no idea why he's crying

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What did the lawyer get for Christmas? More paper work

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What does a turkey do? I don't know I'm not a turkey

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Why did the girl drop her lollipop? She got hit by a truck

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What's a bit smaller than the tallest man in the world? The 2nd tallest man in the world.

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What looks and sounds just like a seagull ? A seagull.

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An Irishman walks into a bar. He gets extremely drunk and gets hit by a train.

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What's the difference between a white man and a black man? Nothing. They are both created in God's image and likeness so get your mind outta the gutter!

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How did the square become a circle? Due to the period of recession in our nation, it was found necessary to cut corners.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a terrorist -lschles

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Q:Ask me my name. A:What is your name? A:Hey why do you need to know that?

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A woman got in her car to drive to work. She kept her hands on the wheel and eyes on the road and was able to avoid any accidents that could have occurred.

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How do you kill a blond? You don't. If you do, you'll get reported to the cops and sent to jail.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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Where do bananas come from? Mexico

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What is the best way to avoid wrinkles as you age? Moisturise with a good quality moisturiser, use high factor suncream on the face, get plenty of sleep, drink plenty of fluids, wear a hat and sunglasses and stay in the shade between 11am and 3pm, and try to eat a diet that is heart-healthy (for example, wholegrain, oily fish, and/or flax seed), as heart failure over a long time leads to sagging skin with a loss of elasticity.

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Q: How did that man get two black eyes? A: He was born!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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