Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

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You just threw a fireman and a baby out of a skyscraper... who arrived earth first? Adam and Eve. Moral: Because theology is bullshit.

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint

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Yo mama is so fat that it is obvious obesity runs in the family.

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Why did the man punch his wife? Because he was angry

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Snapple fact #572: You're a terrible person.

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What is big, green and fuzzy and if it falls out of a tree and hit you in the head, it will probably kill you? A pool table.

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Why did the fat man fall faster than the skinny man? He didn't. Masses does not affect the speed of falling objects. Everything with mass and volume falls with an acceleration of 9.81m/s^2 on Earth. Therefore the greater mass of the heavier man did not affect his falling speed. Both men fell at the same speed.

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Why did the girls head explode while eating supper? There was a grenade in her food.

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Q: How did that man get two black eyes? A: He was born!

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Why did the woman keep getting sexually harassed while calling for her lost dog? Her dog is named "Ilovedicks."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because he lives in a chicken coop and has never even seen a road.

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what smells like red paint but is blue paint?

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Knock knock Who's There Doctor Doctor Who? Wrong, it's Dr. Doozer, you have AIDS

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What did the prisoner receive on his 44th birthday? Well obviously all mail in prisons is checked, but nothing dangerous was found. He received a book on different types of steam engines (he is a railway fan), some chocolate (galaxy caramel, which is his favourite), a crossword challenge book (he gets bored in his cell) and the anti joke book.

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Whats red and you can't see it? No Tomatoes

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What did the little crippled boy get for his birthday? He's an orphan so he doesn't know his birthday.

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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

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Which came first, the chicken or the egg? It's a meaningless question because animals had been creating eggs for millions of years before chickens ever evolved.

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What do you call a black man on the side of the road? -A black man who needs a ride.

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here's a joke a black man goes in a store and buy something

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What did the man want a car for his birthday? 7.

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What do you get when you mix a dog and a cow blood everywhere

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops