What do you call a man with no arms and legs swimming? Drowning.

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What did Justin Bieber get for Christmas? An iPod Touch and a few nice sweaters.

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Burger King cashier: Are you on Team Jacob or Team Edward? Man: I'm on team I'm freaking hungry; now give me my food!

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the world flooded and everybody died how did they die? the all fell into lava!

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Why did the girls head explode while eating supper? There was a grenade in her food.

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What couldn't the Asian drive? Because he had just gotten laser eye surgery, and the doctor recommended that he didn't drive for a few days.

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Which came first, the chicken or the egg? It's a meaningless question because animals had been creating eggs for millions of years before chickens ever evolved.

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What does a turkey do? I don't know I'm not a turkey

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a Jew had a small nose

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What happened when a boy threw a ball at the wall? It hit him in the face

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What did the Mexican firefighter name his twin boys? Thomas and David after his father and grandfather.

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why did aodhan not play BO2? Aodhan has Cerebral palsy.

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You just threw a fireman and a baby out of a skyscraper... who arrived earth first? Adam and Eve. Moral: Because theology is bullshit.

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How can you kill a blonde? Hack her to bits.

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When life gets you down, make a comforter.

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Do you know the joke about the two guys who went to Paris ? Me neither.

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Q: What do you call a pakistani that practices medice? A: Doctor

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot, you racist!

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Yo mama is so fat that it is obvious obesity runs in the family.

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How do you kill a blond? You don't. If you do, you'll get reported to the cops and sent to jail.

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What was the Alzheimer patient favorite drink? What was the Alzheimer patient favorite drink?

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what smells like red paint but is blue paint?

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What's the difference between mw2 and mw3? Nothing

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Ask me how old my cat is. How old's your cat? I don't know.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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