A man walks into a bar. He has three drinks, then he leaves because he realizes he needs to get home because he has to get up early to go to his job in the morning.

What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot, you racist!

why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a terrorist -lschles

How could they tell Michael Jackson was dead? He showed no vital signs.

A seal walks into a club...

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

What is the worst part about being a black Jew? Having to sit at the back of the gas chamber.

Why was six afraid of seven? Fishsticks

Q: What did the priest say to the rabbi? A: Our God is a wonderful, loving god; praise his name.

Q : Why was the little girl crying? A : Because she tripped and hurt her knee.

What did the priest do when he noticed the young boy bent over picking up crayons he had dropped? He helped him pick them up

make me a sandwich!

what smells like red paint but is blue paint?

A man is sitting on a bench in a park crying a man walking by asks why he's crying, and the man answers that he has no idea why he's crying

Q. What's the difference between dead babies and celebrities? A. Nobody likes celebrities.

Which came first, the chicken or the egg? It's a meaningless question because animals had been creating eggs for millions of years before chickens ever evolved.

I got 99 problems... and an indeterminate number of them are bitches.

I like my coffee like i like my woman, Without a penis.

In Soviet Russia, there are communists.

You just threw a fireman and a baby out of a skyscraper... who arrived earth first? Adam and Eve. Moral: Because theology is bullshit.

Q:Ask me my name. A:What is your name? A:Hey why do you need to know that?

A Man goes into a watch store. Why? To buy a watch

What do you call a man with no arms and legs swimming? Drowning.

someone called a frog a frog

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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