What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? AHHHH WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS!?!?!? MY HAND!!! MY HAND!!! AHHHHHHH!!!!! JUST KILL ME!!! PLEASE WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?!?! MY OTHER HAND AHHHH!!! HAHAAAAAAAAAaaaa..... AHHHHHHH WHY?!?! MY LEG!!!! MY FOOT NO!!!!! PLEASE!!!!! Ah AH AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAA HAHAHAaaa WHYYYYYYYYY!?

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what smells like red paint but is blue paint?

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whats worse than finding 30 babies nailed to 30 trees? finding coal in your stocking at christmas.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

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what did the duck say to the chicken .nothing

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here's a joke a black man goes in a store and buy something

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What did John F. Kennedy say to Kurt Cobain? Nothing. They never met.

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What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

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What did the man say to the attractive female bartender as he left the bar? Well, it's been fun but I hate you so I'm leaving to kill your entire family.

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What do you call someone who can't move their arms or their legs A quadriplegic

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what's the difference between a duck? one leg is the same.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs on your porch? Matt.

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You're momma's so fat, she's got high cholesterol.

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What do you call something that comes out of a llama's butt? poop

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Pickup Line: Hay girl is that a mirror in your pants. Becuase I can see me in it.

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A man and his family walk into a talent agent's office. The man proceeds to sexually accost his wife and children. The agent calls security who escort the family out and helps the wife find a domestic violence shelter to stay at.

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Boom.

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What's brown and sticky? Poop.

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Ever since I've been using chloroform as cologne I've been getting laid a lot.

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs swimming? Drowning.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?? Because it Died

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What do you call an Arab flying a plane? A pilot. *BOOM* Never mind, he was a terrorist.

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Duke: Hi Sally: Hello Duke: Nice weather huh? Sally: I couldn't tell ya duke, I'm not a meteorologist.

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Why did the women hit the telephone pole? There are many theories but one suggests that it is due to womens statistically lower cognitive spacial reasoning abilities.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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