My grandmother always use to tell me "slow and steady wins the race." Well, that was before she died in a house fire.

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot, you racist!

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Why is it hard to fool an aborted fetus? Because it wasn't born yesterday.

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Why did Benjamin Franklin go to the movies? Dim message, sapi message=InputBox("Find Out","Why did Benjamin Franklin Go To the Movies?") Set sapi=CreateObject("sapi.spvoice") sapi.Speak message

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i was molested.

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Knock, Knock. Come in.

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Knock knock Who's There Doctor Doctor Who? Wrong, it's Dr. Doozer, you have AIDS

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Q: What's the difference between an African American and a bench? A: An African American is a human being of black dissent, while a bench is an inanimate object that people sit on.

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A kitten walks into a bar and orders a saucer of milk. Everyone enjoys the novelty of his presence.

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What?

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What does a turkey do? I don't know I'm not a turkey

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a Jew had a small nose

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Why did the girl drop her lollipop? She got hit by a truck

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs on your porch? Matt.

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Boom.

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When life throws you lemons, duck because they freakin' hurt.

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"What's 'green', 'blue', and 'red' all over?" My color-blind friend said in confusion.

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guy 1... "do you no any funny jokes?" guy2 ..."no" guy1 ..."same"

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A man is sitting on a bench in a park crying a man walking by asks why he's crying, and the man answers that he has no idea why he's crying

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What's the difference between mw2 and mw3? Nothing

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What did the Catholic preist say to the altar boy? You've been a good altar boy.

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What did Little Timmy say when his house fell down? I'm not sure but that sounds like a very sad event that I hope to never encounter in my personal experiences.

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? He said, "Where's my tractor?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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