My grandmother always use to tell me "slow and steady wins the race." Well, that was before she died in a house fire.

why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a terrorist -lschles

why is six afraid of seven? because seven ate nine

Q: What happens when your name is Gretchen Weiner? A: You can never make "fetch" happen.

Burger King cashier: Are you on Team Jacob or Team Edward? Man: I'm on team I'm freaking hungry; now give me my food!

Why did Benjamin Franklin go to the movies? Dim message, sapi message=InputBox("Find Out","Why did Benjamin Franklin Go To the Movies?") Set sapi=CreateObject("sapi.spvoice") sapi.Speak message

Duke: Hi Sally: Hello Duke: Nice weather huh? Sally: I couldn't tell ya duke, I'm not a meteorologist.

Why shouldnt you throw rocks at a black kid on a bike? Because the kid wasn't riding in your way, you could get arrested for assault and battery, and he probably lives in a low income area and cant afford health insurance if he was injured.

i was molested.

3 men find a genie lamp on the side of a road, The genie grants them each a wish as they surely deserve. The first man asks for a jet and the genie glady grants him this and the man starts to fly away. The second man says to make a wall around asia and the genie complies. The third man thinks for a minute and finally says fill it with water and as a genie the genie cannot refuse. They all drowned seeing how the jet had no fuel. The genie goes back to sleep and is picked up by an alien 5,000 years in the future, the Earth is destroyed in 7012(as if we didnt already destroy it). The genie survives and currently resides on uranus.

Why was six afraid of seven? Fishsticks

Why did the aeroplane engine fallon the house? Because of Donnie Darko

Why did the woman keep getting sexually harassed while calling for her lost dog? Her dog is named "Ilovedicks."

Why was Jim fired from his job at the sperm bank? Continual absenteeism and inconsistent work.

Knock knock Who's There Doctor Doctor Who? Wrong, it's Dr. Doozer, you have AIDS

what did the girl trapped in the fire say? help

Why do black people eat watermelon? It is a good source of vitamin C.

Bobby got a new bike there are black kids in bobby's neighborhood bobby doesnt have a new bike anymore

What did the blind, deaf, quadriplegic boy get for Christmas? Cancer.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know why, but I was standing on the other side of the road and I took it home and mamed the chicken with a powerdrill.

An alcoholic walks into a bar. He is destroying his family.

Knock knock Who's there? Labrinth Come in

Why didn't little jimmy get anything for Christmas? He is Jewish.

Women's Rights

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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