what is brown with wheels? a potatoe, i was just kidding about the wheels

What the difference between a black man and a pizza? A black man is capable of feeding a family. A pizza is capable of feeding an American.

What did the lawyer get for Christmas? More paper work

A muslim checks in at an airport and gets on a plane. He reads a book about knitting, gets off the plane at France and goes back to his job as a librarian.

Your mom smells so bad that she proceeded to take a shower and then didnt smell bad at all.

Knock Knock. No one answered, as the person of residence was not home.

What do you call a black man on the side of the road? -A black man who needs a ride.

Knock Knock. Martha, get the door I'm watching the game!

why did aodhan not play BO2? Aodhan has Cerebral palsy.

What did St. Mary Magdalene tell Pontius Pilate during the crucifixion of Christ? All this chaos is making me CROSS-eyed!

Q: What do you call a pakistani that practices medice? A: Doctor

What jew get for christmas? Your money.

why is six afraid of seven? because seven ate nine

"Ask me if I'm a billboard" "Are you a billboard?" "No"

What did Justin Bieber get for Christmas? An iPod Touch and a few nice sweaters.

Burger King cashier: Are you on Team Jacob or Team Edward? Man: I'm on team I'm freaking hungry; now give me my food!

Why did the fat man fall faster than the skinny man? He didn't. Masses does not affect the speed of falling objects. Everything with mass and volume falls with an acceleration of 9.81m/s^2 on Earth. Therefore the greater mass of the heavier man did not affect his falling speed. Both men fell at the same speed.

i was molested.

Wanna hear a joke? Sure. Too bad I don't have one.

What has two legs and graduated from ninja school? Okyrin Sakajuru. He also went on to win two all city titles and roundhouse kick of the day, performed on a wild tiger. As time passes, he stops practicing and becomes a lethargic street criminal. He is eventually captured by local authorities and charged with the robberies and two counts of aggravated assault. Leaving his children behind to the system where they are neglected and depressed about their fathers situation. He makes bail after 3 months and opens a strip club for dwarfs but loses it all after not finding stripper poles that are dwarf friendly.

What happens when a japanese boy goes into a planet called Zypharecion which is 2000 light years away with 20% oxygen and 78% nitrogen and 2% of other earthly air elements and heats up a balloon enough that it explodes? He wont be at that planet because it does not exist and travelling at the speed of light has not been proven possible for humans.

a guy who can fly walks up a hill and jumps off a cliff. his flying power fails him and he dies on impact

Knock knock Who's There Doctor Doctor Who? Wrong, it's Dr. Doozer, you have AIDS

A blonde goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "That is a worrying symptom," says the doctor, who immediately recommends the woman for a thorough psychiatric assessment.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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