Knock Knock. Martha, get the door I'm watching the game!

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Why does Jonny have a phobia birds? Because he has one glued to his face.

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What black and blue and red all over? My mom after my dad comes back from the bar.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, Others don't.

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A barrel of monkeys is only a barrel of laughs if they're alive and telling jokes.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Fishsticks

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What did the grass say to the human "Hey" The human then screams and runs to safety

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Two monkeys are having sex. They both realize they're boys.

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(Q) Why did the little boy cross the road? (A) To get to the police officer. (Q) Why did the little boy need the police officer? (A) because he was raped.

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What did Little Timmy say when his house fell down? I'm not sure but that sounds like a very sad event that I hope to never encounter in my personal experiences.

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What did the small baby faucet say to the daddy faucet? Nothing, they are inanimate objects and cannot talk.

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Did you hear the one about the priest, the rabbi, the astronaut, the olympic diver, the mcdonald's employee, and the web designer? Neither did I...

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A man walks into a bar. It hurt.

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Why was the old lady hard of hearing? She spent many of her young days blasting hard rock from her speakers/

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what did the teacher say to the kid? you failed the kid cried.

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Knock Knock Who's there? me oh

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Why did Sally fall of the Swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

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Your carpol will be here soon! What a pool for cars is coming?

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After a long day on the movie set, Lindsay Lohan decides to go out to a bar. She gets really drunk and high on drugs and some guy takes her back to her trailer and stuffs her muffin.

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Why did the kitten die? Because your mom is gay.

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Whats he best type of terroist? A dead one.

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A black guy, a Mexican guy and a Jew walk into a hospital. They are all undergoing the same chemotherapy treatment.

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How do you kill a blonde? A gun, knife, there are a number of ways really...

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I've got a boner

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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