Knock knock Who's There Doctor Doctor Who? Wrong, it's Dr. Doozer, you have AIDS

What did the prisoner receive on his 44th birthday? Well obviously all mail in prisons is checked, but nothing dangerous was found. He received a book on different types of steam engines (he is a railway fan), some chocolate (galaxy caramel, which is his favourite), a crossword challenge book (he gets bored in his cell) and the anti joke book.

A blonde goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "That is a worrying symptom," says the doctor, who immediately recommends the woman for a thorough psychiatric assessment.

Where do you put a black jew? In the back of the.... oh wait i have never seen a black jew before.

a muslim walks into a bar, he then remembers his religion forbids the drinking of alcohol and walks back out

Emo Girl: Whats Your Favorite song? Regulor Girl: Something Carrie Underwood sing!(: Emo Girl: Are you retarted? Regulor Girl: Well im not the one who loves Emos .-. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Honstley, I didnt right this my cousin told me to wriget this... i think its stupied... And Yes, Ima Emo but im not trying to judge people if there emo or not! :D Luv ya! -Angel- <3

All I want for Chrismas, the murderer of my parents to be caught.

What did the little crippled boy get for his birthday? He's an orphan so he doesn't know his birthday.

What is purple after you stroke it a lot? An eggplant

Did you see that picture of Helen Keller's dad? Yes. She didn't.

Why did Windows crash ? F*ck Windows, that's why.

Girls go to college to get more knowledge. Boys go to Jupiter because they're already smart enough to achieve interplanetary space travel.

What is marios favorite type of jeans? a brand that he enjoys and feels is comfortable in

How much stuff would a stuff muff huff if a stuff muff could huff stuff? Whole dang lotsa

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if I had sex with your mother?

What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

A kitten walks into a bar and orders a saucer of milk. Everyone enjoys the novelty of his presence.

Whats red and you can't see it? No Tomatoes

What has four wheels and can fly? A flying car What else has four wheels and can fly? Another flying car

Bobby got a new bike there are black kids in bobby's neighborhood bobby doesnt have a new bike anymore

poop.

Why couldn't the old man play the piano? His arthritis caused him great pain.

Three nuns walk into a bar. They realize they are in a place they don't want to be, so they leave, casting furtive glances around, fearing that someone from their congregation will see them and think they went in to drink.

What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...