What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers

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Why did the U.S.A. vote in a black president? Because racial prejudice is a thing of the past and the U.S.A. is a liberal and progressive nation.

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Yo mama is so fat that it is obvious obesity runs in the family.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a door? Various answers are acceptable. The door has hinges, a black guy has legs, etc.

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Sometimes I light my hair on fire and pretend I'm a candle.

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What is marios favorite type of jeans? a brand that he enjoys and feels is comfortable in

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What did the tractor say to the cow? I'm a tractor, you're a cow, go figure.

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Whut r bacer dew? Eh muphin

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The sun was burning as the Elephant offered the mouse to walk between the sun and the mouse so the mouse could get some shade. Mouse: Lets switch places so you can have some shade too! Elephant: Good idea! Just then unexpectedly the elephant slipped on a banana peel and tilted towards the mouse. Squish. Moral: The reason they never tell kids the full story... for real.. honest...

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What did Little Timmy say when his house fell down? I'm not sure but that sounds like a very sad event that I hope to never encounter in my personal experiences.

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If you lose your left arm, your right one will be left.

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How did Hellen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room.

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What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

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How do you see a black man in the dark? You dont

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it's a chicken and it doesn't know any better. It probably doesn't know where it is much less where it's going.

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What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb? The lighbulb isn't also dying of terminal cancer.

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elliot forsythe is a paedo

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A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: I guess nobody's home. (leaves.)

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I went to buy some camouflage shorst the other day but I couldn't find any.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

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What did one guy in the bar say to the other? Hi.

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A white man and a black man are standing on the edge of a 20 story building. The view from up there is rather nice.

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Q: If I have 13 icecubes, and you have 12 icecubes, how many pancakes can I fit on the roof? A: Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

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Two monkeys are having sex. They both realize they're boys.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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