Why didn't andrea clean the dishes? She had no hands

What magical power enables Spongebob to talk? There is no magical power. he is a cartoon therefore making him be able to anything in anyone's wild dreams.

Two monkeys are having sex. They both realize they're boys.

Knock, knock. The man knocking finds a note taped to the door saying "we'll be back in a week", the man proceeds to walk back home and tell his wife that they weren't home and that he'll return the rake he borrowed from them next week when they're back.

What do you call a with no arms and no legs floating in the water? About to drown.

What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? AHHHH WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS!?!?!? MY HAND!!! MY HAND!!! AHHHHHHH!!!!! JUST KILL ME!!! PLEASE WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?!?! MY OTHER HAND AHHHH!!! HAHAAAAAAAAAaaaa..... AHHHHHHH WHY?!?! MY LEG!!!! MY FOOT NO!!!!! PLEASE!!!!! Ah AH AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAA HAHAHAaaa WHYYYYYYYYY!?

How do Elmer Fudd take a shower? Without a shampoo, he's bald..

lets see how many dislikes i can get from this...

a muslim walks into a bar, he then remembers his religion forbids the drinking of alcohol and walks back out

what did batman tell robin before they got into the batmobile? -let's get in the batmobile!

whats worse than finding 30 babies nailed to 30 trees? finding coal in your stocking at christmas.

Dislike this!!!!!!

Your mom is so fat, her pants are starting to get tight.

how did the bloop cross the road? to get to the other side

poop.

What do you call ten black men running down the street? A race.

what do Asian people eat? what Asian people eat.

Q: How did Muhamid Ali ( casius clay ) get a black eye? A: He was born

What's green and invisible? This cabbage

"I can't wait to eat this bagle!" "Yes you can." "Yeah, I guess you're right."

When life gives you oranges, make lemonade.

What did Jack give Jill for Christmas? Herpes.

If at first you don't succeed.... maybe skydiving isn't for you...

Q: If I have 13 icecubes, and you have 12 icecubes, how many pancakes can I fit on the roof? A: Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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