Patient: Doctor, will I be able to play the piano when my arm heals? Doctor: Did I not tell you? You insurance didn't cover the cost of this operation. Your arm is never going to be healed!

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What's the difference between an old man and a child? The old man is older than the child

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Invisible Television.

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how many blondes does it take to fix a lightbulb? 764,983,792,545,653,

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Lacrosse

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Q: What comes after 8? A: 9

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Why did the black man fall off the bicycle? He was shot at close range by one of a gang of young white males. This horrific violence was most likely fueled by racial prejudice. Our thoughts go out to the young man's family and friends.

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Why was school cancelled? Because the school was bombed.

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You walk in to your room. 7 chickens on your bed.

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What do you call something that comes out of a llama's butt? poop

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How do you kill a blonde ? Shoot her in the head

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Sarah Palin walks into a bar and the bartender tells her to get the f*&k out.

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What did the tractor say to the cow? I'm a tractor, you're a cow, go figure.

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What did one muffin in the oven say to the other muffin Nothing food doesn't talk

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What did the japonese man say? Nothing that we can understand.

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Why was the manspenis big Cause he was a lucky bastard

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your moms fat. she's ugly too.

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Yo mama's so fat that I make Yo Mama jokes about her!!

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what did the girl trapped in the fire say? help

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A monkey enters a bar and climbs up on a stool. The bartender asks, "What'll ya have, pal?" The monkey, who can niether speak nor understand English, appears slightly perplexed.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Suicide.

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STOP LOOKING AT MY JOKE

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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John had 32 candy bars. He ate 28 of them. What does John have now? daibetes, john has diabetes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops