Two blondes are sitting in a car. They took a drive and later enjoyed turkey sandwiches at the local eatery.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because he lives in a chicken coop and has never even seen a road.

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What?

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how many blondes does it take to fix a lightbulb? 764,983,792,545,653,

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Why did the black man fall off the bicycle? He was shot at close range by one of a gang of young white males. This horrific violence was most likely fueled by racial prejudice. Our thoughts go out to the young man's family and friends.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not Madeline McCann.

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Q: What did the diddler say to the little boy? A: Can i touch you inappropriately?

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Why did the alien cross the road. To get to his ship.

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why was the panda sent to prison? he played a major roll in the bombing of 9-11

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A guy walks into a bar. Ouch

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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Q : Why was the little girl crying? A : Because she tripped and hurt her knee.

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What has two legs and graduated from ninja school? Okyrin Sakajuru. He also went on to win two all city titles and roundhouse kick of the day, performed on a wild tiger. As time passes, he stops practicing and becomes a lethargic street criminal. He is eventually captured by local authorities and charged with the robberies and two counts of aggravated assault. Leaving his children behind to the system where they are neglected and depressed about their fathers situation. He makes bail after 3 months and opens a strip club for dwarfs but loses it all after not finding stripper poles that are dwarf friendly.

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Why did the girl drown? Well, the girl probably did drown because she was within the ages of 3-5 years old, and she probably had a physical incapapbilty and she could not swim so her parents didn't save her.

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What kind of cookies does a pedophile order from the girl scouts? Samoas...pedophiles love coconut.

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Guy 1: "Hey, you have some updawg on your face." Guy 2: "Oh, thanks. Did I get it?" Guy 1: "Yeah, I think so."

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How do you get a small girl of a swing ? Throw a fridge at her

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Ow, there's an arrow in my knee!

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

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Q: What did the first kid say to the second kid before he handed him a pencil? A: May I have a pencil?

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A dog walks into a bar, looks at the bartender, lifts its leg and pisses on a bar stool. What does the bartender do ? He chases the dog out the bar and gets a mop to mop up the piss.

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Ever since I've been using chloroform as cologne I've been getting laid a lot.

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A Man goes into a watch store. Why? To buy a watch

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What's black without keys. A keyboard after you hit it with a shovel.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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