What did Jack give Jill for Christmas? Herpes.

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am i invited to party? no

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Roses are red, violets are blue, why am i even talking to you?

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You wanna hear an inside joke? That was one of them.

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A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender for 4 beers. The bartender replies, "One at a time, mate, will that work for you?" To which the man replies, "No", leaves, and drives his 1994 Toyota Corolla off of the road into the pit of a volcano.

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A fat man takes a crap, it looked like something a rhino would curl out.

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why do women wear perfume and make-up? 'cause they're ugly and smell bad

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what did batman tell robin before they got into the batmobile? -let's get in the batmobile!

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What's the difference between a gay white man and a gay black man? Nothing because they are both sexually attracted to men.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Suicide.

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How do you see a black man in the dark? You dont

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A woman walks up to her man and asks him to take out the trash. He agrees and takes the trash out.

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What's the best part about having sex with twenty-six year olds? They're of legal age to give consent.

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Q: What did Micheal Jackson Say to the boys? A: He can't speak because he's dead.

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Punch line.

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What is big, red, and beats rocks? A big, red, rock beater.

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Asian: what time is it? other person: time for you to open your eyes.

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What do you call something that comes out of a llama's butt? poop

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What's worse than finding ten babies nailed to a tree? One baby nailed to ten trees

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sometimes i take my duck a shower, i always use cold water because if i use hot water it will think im cooking it.

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''Wanna hear a joke?'' ''Sure'' ''a joke''

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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Why was the baby smoking? He was locked in a hot car.

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How did the soccer team win? They scored the most goals.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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