How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if I had sex with your mother?

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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A kitten walks into a bar and orders a saucer of milk. Everyone enjoys the novelty of his presence.

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What has four wheels and can fly? A flying car What else has four wheels and can fly? Another flying car

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Bobby got a new bike there are black kids in bobby's neighborhood bobby doesnt have a new bike anymore

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poop.

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My mom told me about a funnel they make for women now that they can use to pee standing up. I told her it was a ploy to promote feminism.

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What jew get for christmas? Your money.

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i said wut wut in the butt!

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what do you call a grown man driving a plane you dont it isnt possible to drive a plane

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Why dont we just make fun of both? *mexican music plays*

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What is marios favorite type of jeans? a brand that he enjoys and feels is comfortable in

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What is big, green and fuzzy and if it falls out of a tree and hit you in the head, it will probably kill you? A pool table.

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the world flooded and everybody died how did they die? the all fell into lava!

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what did one lady say to another lady? we are both ladies

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What has two legs and graduated from ninja school? Okyrin Sakajuru. He also went on to win two all city titles and roundhouse kick of the day, performed on a wild tiger. As time passes, he stops practicing and becomes a lethargic street criminal. He is eventually captured by local authorities and charged with the robberies and two counts of aggravated assault. Leaving his children behind to the system where they are neglected and depressed about their fathers situation. He makes bail after 3 months and opens a strip club for dwarfs but loses it all after not finding stripper poles that are dwarf friendly.

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash with a sludge hammer, the other is a watermelon

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A chicken crossed the road and the farmer said, "Where the hell is that chicken going!?"

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hi hi strager danger

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What did the prisoner receive on his 44th birthday? Well obviously all mail in prisons is checked, but nothing dangerous was found. He received a book on different types of steam engines (he is a railway fan), some chocolate (galaxy caramel, which is his favourite), a crossword challenge book (he gets bored in his cell) and the anti joke book.

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What's worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm in it? The spelling errors on anti-jokes.com

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Emo Girl: Whats Your Favorite song? Regulor Girl: Something Carrie Underwood sing!(: Emo Girl: Are you retarted? Regulor Girl: Well im not the one who loves Emos .-. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Honstley, I didnt right this my cousin told me to wriget this... i think its stupied... And Yes, Ima Emo but im not trying to judge people if there emo or not! :D Luv ya! -Angel- <3

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Whats Obama's last name?

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vn[oiaehsobv[khpogjglprljffknfsiphgeknkldfekageriyreojgyperogerpojregkeporg? cuase u stupid and this stupid joke is to

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops