guess how...chicken pow! guess who...chicken poo! guess when...chicken pen! guess where...chicken hair! guess what...your adopted.

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs swimming? Drowning.

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how do you wake lady gaga up? you hit her in the face with a frying pan

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the world flooded and everybody died how did they die? the all fell into lava!

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how much blow can charlie sheen hold up his nose? enough to kill Two and A Half Men

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yo mama so dumb that we sat her down to take a standardized, comprehensive IQ test measuring spatial, logical, linguistic, and memorization abilities. Her aggregate score was an 87, indicated she is roughly one standard deviation below the mean of the population, which is not low enough to qualify for government assistance under the Americans with Disabilities Act (1990) but does impede her understanding of more complex abstract concepts and things pertaining to higher culture. In spite of this, she has raised a child of average intelligence, and has retained the same job at Walgreen's for 14 years, People seem to like her because she is polite and rarely late. Your mother is an inspiration to low-IQ people living in high-IQ developed countries, demonstrating that an inability to fully understand abstracts does necessarily lead to a life of meagerness and frustration, so long as you work hard, keep your spirits high, and accept Jesus Christ as your personal lord and savior.

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What was the Alzheimer patient favorite drink? What was the Alzheimer patient favorite drink?

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I've got a boner

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What will you be doing right before you die? ... ... living.

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A man walks in to a bar. He was hospitalized and died later that day.

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A married man takes the ring off his finger.

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how did the bloop cross the road? to get to the other side

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What do you call ten black men running down the street? A race.

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A man ingested a hamburger. It proved fatal due to a tomato allergy.

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What's the difference between a bird and a horse? - Both can fly, exept the horse.

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A Man goes into a watch store. Why? To buy a watch

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How could they tell Michael Jackson was dead? He showed no vital signs.

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How do you kill a blond? You don't. If you do, you'll get reported to the cops and sent to jail.

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What's brown and sticky? Poop.

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A white man and a black man are standing on the edge of a 20 story building. The view from up there is rather nice.

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What's the most stupid thing you have ever heard? Woman's Studies.

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What's black and white and red all over. An interracial suicide pact.

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What has two legs and graduated from ninja school? Okyrin Sakajuru. He also went on to win two all city titles and roundhouse kick of the day, performed on a wild tiger. As time passes, he stops practicing and becomes a lethargic street criminal. He is eventually captured by local authorities and charged with the robberies and two counts of aggravated assault. Leaving his children behind to the system where they are neglected and depressed about their fathers situation. He makes bail after 3 months and opens a strip club for dwarfs but loses it all after not finding stripper poles that are dwarf friendly.

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Why was Jim fired from his job at the sperm bank? Continual absenteeism and inconsistent work.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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