a blind man walks into a bar it hurt.

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What did the cop say to the robber? You have the right to remain silent

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It's black, and when it falls out of a tree, your refrigurator is broken. Your refrigurator.

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A kitten walks into a bar and orders a saucer of milk. Everyone enjoys the novelty of his presence.

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All I want for Chrismas, the murderer of my parents to be caught.

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why did the blond stare at a carton of orange juice for 2 hours? because she was reading the nutrition list, and she is a slow and patient reader.

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What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a terrorist.

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My grandmother always use to tell me "slow and steady wins the race." Well, that was before she died in a house fire.

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Q: What happens when your name is Gretchen Weiner? A: You can never make "fetch" happen.

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What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? AHHHH WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS!?!?!? MY HAND!!! MY HAND!!! AHHHHHHH!!!!! JUST KILL ME!!! PLEASE WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?!?! MY OTHER HAND AHHHH!!! HAHAAAAAAAAAaaaa..... AHHHHHHH WHY?!?! MY LEG!!!! MY FOOT NO!!!!! PLEASE!!!!! Ah AH AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAA HAHAHAaaa WHYYYYYYYYY!?

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash with a sludge hammer, the other is a watermelon

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Why couldn't the morbidly obese lady order a cheeseburger? A: Because it wasn't on the menu

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poop.

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What is purple after you stroke it a lot? An eggplant

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An Asian, Burnett, and a Blond are stranded on an island. They all say, "What the crap?! How'd I get on this island?!"

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speacking of cheese... steve jobs died

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Yo mama is so fat that it is obvious obesity runs in the family.

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What do you call something that comes out of a llama's butt? poop

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?? Because it Died

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Why dont we just make fun of both? *mexican music plays*

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Why did Benjamin Franklin go to the movies? Dim message, sapi message=InputBox("Find Out","Why did Benjamin Franklin Go To the Movies?") Set sapi=CreateObject("sapi.spvoice") sapi.Speak message

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Why are you asleep? Because I'm tired.

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what did one lady say to another lady? we are both ladies

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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