A black walks into a bar Because it is still around the time of segregation, they don't serve colored people

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Whats worse than a dead baby at the bottom of a trash can? Two dead babies. Whats worse then that 5 dead babies and worse then that? Im starting to have suspicions of you being a mass murdurer of small children.

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What do you call a deaf man? It would be unwise to call him anything, as he would have difficulty hearing you.

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Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

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Q: What's green has four legs and would kill you if it fell off a roof and hit you? A: A pool table.

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How's a raven like a writing desk. you really are alice.

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What is worse than getting a 30% on a test? Getting a 29% on a test.

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What makes women so mystifying and beautiful? Tits.

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What's the difference between an old man and a child? The old man is older than the child

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Why didn't Hitler drink whiskey? Because it made him mean.

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im gay because im gay

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An irishman walks out of a pub

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A child in Africa developed Malaria. He became very sick and died.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What did the Dyslexic man write on his Christmas card? Merry Christmas

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Michael J. Fox asked me if I wanted my drink shaken or stirred, did I really have a choice?

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Sarah Palin

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Q. What is worse than being British???? A. Not being British

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Hey i just met you & this is crazy but Nia and Goober Made a baby

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Knock knock. Who's ther? Your friend Billy i've been shot and need help

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What did the japonese man say? Nothing that we can understand.

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Drunk guy... Hey i just maybe And this is number But here's my crazy So call me met you

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What's 2+2? It's certainly not 1.

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Why did the mammoth cross the road? For financial reasons.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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