Q: What's green has four legs and would kill you if it fell off a roof and hit you? A: A pool table.

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What did the Dyslexic man write on his Christmas card? Merry Christmas

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Why a warm-harted man turned into cold-blooded? He's dead

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A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

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How Do Bulls Drive Cars? They cant, they have hooves making it impractical for a Bull to Drive a car.

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Sarah Palin

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Women's rights.

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How do you kill a blonde ? Shoot her in the head

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who wins a race a white guy or a black guy? depends who's faster

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Hey i just met you & this is crazy but Nia and Goober Made a baby

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Drunk guy... Hey i just maybe And this is number But here's my crazy So call me met you

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have cancer."

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your mommy so gehto shes black

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it's a chicken and it doesn't know any better. It probably doesn't know where it is much less where it's going.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why did the koala bear fall out of the tree? Because it's dead.

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Q. What is worse than being British???? A. Not being British

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Q: If I have 13 icecubes, and you have 12 icecubes, how many pancakes can I fit on the roof? A: Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

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Isn't it funny that we think it's totally normal for females to not have penises but for literally EVERY OTHER group of people, it's weird and not ok double standard?

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Just call the fire department, they're trained for that kind of stuff

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what does a blue watermelon and a cactus that looks like a penis have in common? orange ya glad i didn't say banana!

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Whats worse than a dead baby at the bottom of a trash can? Two dead babies. Whats worse then that 5 dead babies and worse then that? Im starting to have suspicions of you being a mass murdurer of small children.

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A black walks into a bar Because it is still around the time of segregation, they don't serve colored people

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops