What did Pittsburgh say to Philadelphia? .........Lightbulb.........

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hi, im sober.

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Anti-Joke.com Best thing since something better that preceded it.

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How are a duck and a tri-cycle the same? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

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A: How do you make a fire with two sticks? B: Ask your mother, we did it last night.

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guess how...chicken pow! guess who...chicken poo! guess when...chicken pen! guess where...chicken hair! guess what...your adopted.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar.

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A man walks into a McDonald's and proceeds to buy a burger, unfortunately a man was robbing the fast food restaurant, what did the man do. Buy a burger

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Why is Jem no longer a cartoon? Because they all died from toxic hairspray.

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What did the Dyslexic man write on his Christmas card? Merry Christmas

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead.

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How is nothing something if it is nothing?...

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What's green and invisible? This cabbage

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A man walks into a bar... ouch. He received a minor concussion from the impact of the cement wall, and a slight goose egg on his forehead.

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Your mother is so good in the kitchen that we all asked for a second helping.

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What happens 2 seconds after you thorw a rock out a two-story window? The rock hits the ground.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor. Doctor who? What? No? I'm here to inform you that your child won't be coming out of that coma, I'm sorry.

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Your moma's so fat, she's got type 2 diabetes

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What happens when Chuck Norris jumps off the 3rd floor. He falls to the ground and hurts himself badly

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if you are what you eat then you're a hamburger

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have cancer."

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What kind of party doesn't have cake? The Nazi Party.

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A 65 year old man is tired with his life. He begins to realize that it is meaningless to him. He wants no part in the world anymore so he decided to commit suicide. On his way to commit suicide, he comes across a magical man that has an extraordinary offer. This magical man has offered to grant the 65 year old man the power to fly. The 65 year old man, accepts the offer in great interest, but the magical man wants something in return for his deed. The 65 year old man, offers all the money in his wallet to the magical man. The magical man accepts his offer of all the money and continues. With a flick of the wrist, the magical man says, "fly, fly, high as the sky, i grant this man the ability to fly". The 65 year old man is greatly excited now that he has the ability to fly. He cant wait to try out his new power. He runs to the nearest cliff and jumps. Too bad the "magical man" was really a male prostitute that was broke and homeless. The 65 year old man died on impact and the male prostitue walked away with a wallet full of cash.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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