SNAPPLE!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

what did one farmer say to the other farmer we are farmers

thumb_up thumb_down +23

An insane individual walks into a bank and asks for $500. The teller refuses since he doesn't have an account, so the individual pulls out a gun and asks the teller again. The teller presses the silent panic button, causing the cops to show up and arrest the gunman, but not before he manages to shoot the teller and the small child standing next two counters over.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why is 6 scared of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A Jew and a Nazi have dinner together...... they both immensely enjoyed the wine.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, Others don't.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why a warm-harted man turned into cold-blooded? He's dead

thumb_up thumb_down +5

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's black, and hangs from trees in my backyard? Blackberries

thumb_up thumb_down -5

oliver is gay. so much so that he has hex with other men and dosent mind it very much

thumb_up thumb_down -29

A little boy asked his mom what fucking was, so she showed him.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A black walks into a bar Because it is still around the time of segregation, they don't serve colored people

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Q:How many mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A:Just Juan.

thumb_up thumb_down +110

Patient: Doctor, will I be able to play the piano when my arm heals? Doctor: Did I not tell you? You insurance didn't cover the cost of this operation. Your arm is never going to be healed!

thumb_up thumb_down +82

A married man takes the ring off his finger.

thumb_up thumb_down +78

Take My Wife- Because as it stands, I'm having frequent, toe-curling, unprotected sex with your wife. And that just doesnt seem fair.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers

thumb_up thumb_down +30

a

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A man walks into a bar and says "Hi everybody, it's me!" So everybody turns round. But it wasn't him.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: A black man is walking down the street with a television, where did he just come from? A: Best Buy, he just got a bonus, and wanted to reward himself.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

There's an American, an African, and a Chinese walking down the street. Because the bar is down there.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

When life gives you oranges, make lemonade.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops