What magical power enables Spongebob to talk? There is no magical power. he is a cartoon therefore making him be able to anything in anyone's wild dreams.

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What did the rainbow sun say to the flower-faced elephant? "Want some tea and hamsters?" I'm addicted to acid.

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I once looked at a hedge that had the same colour leaves as all of the other hedges in that particular area.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor. Doctor who? What? No? I'm here to inform you that your child won't be coming out of that coma, I'm sorry.

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What's worse than dying? Living in Africa

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What's 2+2? It's certainly not 1.

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knock knock who's there? Kallie Kallie who? sorry, wrong house

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What is worse than getting a 30% on a test? Getting a 29% on a test.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have cancer."

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What's red, blue, green, yellow, pink, purple, orange, teal, light green, brown, black and white? Colours, except for black and white, for they are the absence and amalgam of all colours, respectively.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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What do you call an arab flying a 747? A pliot.

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Rich people gave money to charity Charity gave money to the homeless The homeless spent the money on drugs

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Lol, listen, the suggestion lies in the "not not", you are using not twice in your mind, which under trance makes it so your subconcious registers that you are using a double negative while you consciously do not. Look back at the messages and register consciously that you and I have been using "not not" twice during the past messages, when the net shuts down here, you reinforce the "I will totally notnot, tell him" so the suggestion just gets stronger.

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I told a woman to make me at turkey sandwich. Of course she complied seeing as I was at Subway.

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Why did the teenager write a joke on here? Because after hours of surfing this website and casually laughing at herself she realized she had no life and the only way to feel happy with her self would be submitting her own to here.

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What's green and invisible? This cabbage

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One day a horse goes to a bakery store and asks the shopkeeper for a fresh loaf of bread. Surprised at the request the shopkeeper asked - White bread or whole wheat? To which the horse replied - Makes no difference cause i rode my bicycle to work yesterday.

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What do you call a black man selling drugs? average

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Yo momma so fat she was baptized in a church, because she wasn't as fat as she is currently.

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An Englishman, Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They enjoy a few quiet drinks while watching a rugby match between Italy and France on the big screen, which is why they came into this particular bar. The Englishman hopes Italy will win, the Irishman is also supporting Italy while the Scotsman is up for France. France wins the match and the Scotsman says "Good game lads eh?" The others agree.

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A black walks into a bar Because it is still around the time of segregation, they don't serve colored people

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What did the japonese man say? Nothing that we can understand.

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Why couldn't the boy see? He was dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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