Why'd I have sex with your mom? I'm your father and I love your mother very much

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Take My Wife- Because as it stands, I'm having frequent, toe-curling, unprotected sex with your wife. And that just doesnt seem fair.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "How'd you open the door?"

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers

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A n antelope walks into a bar and many people leave for the sake of their safety and animal control gets called to escort the antelope out of the bar.

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A man walks into a bar and says "Hi everybody, it's me!" So everybody turns round. But it wasn't him.

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Q: A black man is walking down the street with a television, where did he just come from? A: Best Buy, he just got a bonus, and wanted to reward himself.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

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What's black, and hangs from trees in my backyard? Blackberries

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Why did the man walk into the bar? He wast thirsty.

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What's green and invisible? This cabbage

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What to you do when a monkey walks into your bar? Quietly escort it out and into the nearest zoo.

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Just call the fire department, they're trained for that kind of stuff

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Knock knock. Who's ther? Your friend Billy i've been shot and need help

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Why did the girl fall off the couch? She had a seizure.

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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Q: why did the girl fall off the swing?? A: because she had no arms or legs.

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A priest and a rabbi are playing golf one weekend. The priest tees off first. When the rabbi steps up to tee off, it begins to rain heavily. Dismayed, the rabbi says, "I thought it there was only a 10% chance of rain today."

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A monkey enters a bar and climbs up on a stool. The bartender asks, "What'll ya have, pal?" The monkey, who can niether speak nor understand English, appears slightly perplexed.

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Why does a black man break into a car? Because he had closed the windows and locked his keys inside.

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Why did the old lady start crying? Because her daughter was raped and killed.

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How did Hellen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room.

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Why is 6 scared of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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A Jew and a Nazi have dinner together...... they both immensely enjoyed the wine.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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