Your momma's so fat when she walks into a restaurant she orders salad.

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Did you hear about the blonde who jumped out off a bridge? She was clinically depressed and took her own life because of her terribly low self-esteem.

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Why did the fat man fall faster than the skinny man? He didn't. Masses does not affect the speed of falling objects. Everything with mass and volume falls with an acceleration of 9.81m/s^2 on Earth. Therefore the greater mass of the heavier man did not affect his falling speed. Both men fell at the same speed.

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What do you get when you cross a blonde with Nickelodon? You get Dora because she is allways telling you what to do.

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Your momma's so fat that when she uses a hoolahoop, she gets tired after one try and has to stop.

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A little boy asked his mom what fucking was, so she showed him.

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Two monkeys are having sex. They both realize they're boys.

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An Englishman, Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They enjoy a few quiet drinks while watching a rugby match between Italy and France on the big screen, which is why they came into this particular bar. The Englishman hopes Italy will win, the Irishman is also supporting Italy while the Scotsman is up for France. France wins the match and the Scotsman says "Good game lads eh?" The others agree.

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Knock knock. Who's ther? Your friend Billy i've been shot and need help

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Yo mama's so fat that I make Yo Mama jokes about her!!

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where can you find a monkey, a blond, and a bear? the zoo.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Finding your babies head in a microwave

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Invisible Television.

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What do you get when you cross and elephant and a dog? Nothing, because you cannot breed creatures of different geniuses.

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Q:I finished my Homework A:thats what she said

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An Asian, Burnett, and a Blond are stranded on an island. They all say, "What the crap?! How'd I get on this island?!"

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If you lose your left arm, your right one will be left.

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why did Stevie Wonder run a stop sign? he was changing his CD's and missed it.

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Ice cream You scream We all scream Because there is a murderer killing our friends

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because him and his girlfriend were in a bad relationship and he needed to get away for a while.

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What did the boy say to the Vietnam veteran? Where are your legs?

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A French, an American and a Belgian are going together on holidays. I hope they'll have good weather.

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roses are red violets are blue some poems rhyme this one doesn't

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, penis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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