An irishman walks out of a pub

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A sphere rolls around the corner and falls over.

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How many dead children can you fit in a garbage can? Give me a knife and i will find out

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How many lesbians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, but she had a very muscular vagina.

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japan4.

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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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Whats plastic and phonie a phone

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A seal walks into a club...

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Why did the mans nuts itch he had crabs

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what is the difference between a Ferrari and a bucket of dead babies......... I dont have a Ferrari in my garage

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why was the panda sent to prison? he played a major roll in the bombing of 9-11

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Why was the baby smoking? He was locked in a hot car.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

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Whats the difference between a walnut and a baby ? Ones fun to hit with a hammer and the other is a walnut

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Q. Where do snowmen keep their money? A. A snowman is an anthropomorphic snow sculpture made of frozen water. They therefore cannot earn, keep or have any use for money.

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whats green can fly and has legs? a plane i lied about the legs

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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What has 4 legs and goes "meow." A cat. Dang! You already heard it.

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lol this is the best joke ever!

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Everyone is special in there own ways except for patrick whos demented

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why didnt the mouse go for the cheese on the mouse trap it is proven that mice dont actually really like cheese all that much.

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a dog walk into a landmine, he exploded.

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Your moma's so fat, she's got type 2 diabetes

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A man walks in to a bar. He was hospitalized and died later that day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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