Two monkeys are having sex. They both realize they're boys.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor. Doctor who? What? No? I'm here to inform you that your child won't be coming out of that coma, I'm sorry.

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The sun was burning as the Elephant offered the mouse to walk between the sun and the mouse so the mouse could get some shade. Mouse: Lets switch places so you can have some shade too! Elephant: Good idea! Just then unexpectedly the elephant slipped on a banana peel and tilted towards the mouse. Squish. Moral: The reason they never tell kids the full story... for real.. honest...

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What's 2+2? It's certainly not 1.

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smug face >:}

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Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

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SNAPPLE!

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Asian: what time is it? other person: time for you to open your eyes.

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Nothing. He's Jewish.

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Why did the man walk into the bar? He wast thirsty.

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What did Jack give Jill for Christmas? Herpes.

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Your moma's so fat, she's got type 2 diabetes

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why did the puppy have a sticky tongue? because its owner was abusive and made the puppy lick peanut butter from his balls

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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An Englishman, Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They enjoy a few quiet drinks while watching a rugby match between Italy and France on the big screen, which is why they came into this particular bar. The Englishman hopes Italy will win, the Irishman is also supporting Italy while the Scotsman is up for France. France wins the match and the Scotsman says "Good game lads eh?" The others agree.

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why do women wear perfume and make-up? 'cause they're ugly and smell bad

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What do you call a redneck in a propane store? A customer.

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where can you find a monkey, a blond, and a bear? the zoo.

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A married man takes the ring off his finger.

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A man walks in to a bar. He was hospitalized and died later that day.

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Why did the priest touch the little boy? To Baptise him.

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Why did the old lady start crying? Because her daughter was raped and killed.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers

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Q:I finished my Homework A:thats what she said

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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