An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have a few drinks, then go to a club, where they amuse each other and those around them by completely slurring their words in their already very strong regional accents. Then they get a taxi back to the house of the Englishman as he lives nearest, and stay the night. The next morning, the Scotsman and the Irishmen walk home as they are still hungover and do not wish to risk driving.

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Why couldn't the boy see? He was dead

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How do you kill a blonde woman? Stab her in the stomach so all the acidic contents of her stomach slowly burn her flesh.

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What did Pittsburgh say to Philadelphia? .........Lightbulb.........

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im gay because im gay

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why did the koala bear fall out of the tree? Because it's dead.

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What's the difference between a joke and an anti joke Bananas

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Why did the black man get a life sentence in prison? Because he was involved a mass stabbing in a night club London which saw 4 local teenage girls lose there lives.

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Your mother is so good in the kitchen that we all asked for a second helping.

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What do you tell a black man walking down the street with a suspicious look to him. Hey, how's it going?

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whats small and looks funny? A baby with a penis sewed to its face.

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How's a raven like a writing desk. you really are alice.

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What will you be doing right before you die? ... ... living.

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What is worse than getting a 30% on a test? Getting a 29% on a test.

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A woman walks up to her man and asks him to take out the trash. He agrees and takes the trash out.

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your mommy so gehto shes black

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Why did robin get in the batmobile? Batman told him to

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A man walks into a McDonald's and proceeds to buy a burger, unfortunately a man was robbing the fast food restaurant, what did the man do. Buy a burger

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Why did the dog cross the road? He was on a walk with his owner so they used a crosswalk to safely get back home.

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor? It didn't, a cookie is a food, therefore it doesn't have working organs.

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Your mama's so old that typical places of business grant her the senior citizen discount.

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Your mother is so fat the she is clinically obese.

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How do you make a man sad? By drowning him in a Bede.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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