A black walks into a bar Because it is still around the time of segregation, they don't serve colored people

thumb_up thumb_down -37

So there's this boy who really love clowns. His room is adorned with circus and clown posters and his one dream is to go to a circus and see a clown. One day he sees an ad in the newspaper for a circus that was headed toward his town. He begged and pleaded to his parents to let him go, and when they finally agreed he was ecstatic. The boy was in awe of all the things that the circus held, elephants, lions, tightrope walkers and trapeze artists, but there was nothing he was more excited for then the main show with the clowns. He took a seat and out came the clown on a unicycle. The boy was having the time of his life, when the clown suddenly called for someone from the audience. The boy immediately ran to the center of the stage. The clown asked the boy "Are you a horse's head?" then held the mic to the boy. "No," he replied. "Are you a horse's mouth?" "No." "Then you must be a horse's BUTT!" The crowd erupted in laughter and the boy was mortified. He ran out of the circus tent and vowed never to return. He grew up with a hatred for clowns and even had to see multiple therapists. 30 years passed and the boy was now a man. The man looked in his morning paper, only to see that a circus was in town. He decided he would visit one last time. There it was, the elephants and tightrope walkers. And then he saw it, the same clown from 30 years ago in the same show. He walked up and the clown asked the same questions. "Are you a horse's head?" "No." "Are you a horse's mouth?" "No." "Then you must be a horse's BUTT!" Then man the took the microphone from the clown and said, "Screw you clown."

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Why did the mammoth cross the road? For financial reasons.

thumb_up thumb_down +174

What is the easiest way to babysit a black kid? Find an activity that you can both relate to and enjoy. Hopefully after doing this for a while, the youngster will become tired and fall asleep. You can then watch TV, read or talk on your cell phone until his or her parents get home.

thumb_up thumb_down +64

What's the difference between an old man and a child? The old man is older than the child

thumb_up thumb_down +42

How are a duck and a tri-cycle the same? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't because he wasn't capable of having emotions after he fell into a coma and died 10 months ago after a severe car crash involving a drunk driver. The believed driver,3 had a blood alcohol of .26 and rear ended 6's car at 60 mph. 3 was uninjured and promptly arrested but....6 wasn't so lucky. The doctors said there was no chance of him coming back and they pulled the plug.He was only 9 days away from his 32nd birthday. The funeral was held shortly after, 7 seemed the most upset and couldn't hold back the tears well enough to make it through the whole service. The family is now forever scarred. In Loving Memory of 6 February 22,1982-February 13,2014 Loving father, Caring husband, Forever in our hearts

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A horse walks into a bar why the long face? I have aids

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A sphere rolls around the corner and falls over.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

There once was a man named Joe. Joe had AIDS, and killed all his friends and family The End, now go back to bed, pussy

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Your mother is so good in the kitchen that we all asked for a second helping.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

haha ur single hahahahahhahahahhahaahahhaahaha i am 2

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What happen to the ginger after he posted a joke? He was put in jail for 6 months, and analy raped in prision!

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Whats the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash with a sludge hammer, the other is a watermelon

thumb_up thumb_down -66

where can you find a monkey, a blond, and a bear? the zoo.

thumb_up thumb_down +163

Q:How many mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A:Just Juan.

thumb_up thumb_down +107

Why'd I have sex with your mom? I'm your father and I love your mother very much

thumb_up thumb_down +55

read down and see what it is like BEFOR MARRIAGE boy:at last.i can hardly wait! girl:do you want to leave me? boy:NO! dont even think about it! girl:do you love me? boy:ofcourse! always girl:have you ever cheated on me? boy:NO! why are you even asking? girl:will you kiss me ? boy:every chance i get! girl:will you hit me ? boy:hell no! are you crazy ? girl:can i trust you? boy:yes! girl:darling!! read up again and see what it is like AFTER MARRIAGE (L.W)

thumb_up thumb_down +35

what did the teacher say to the kid? you failed the kid cried.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What do you get when you cross Justin Bieber and One Direction? A bunch of gay pop stars.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

roses are red violets are blue some poems rhyme this one doesn't

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops