How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Just call the fire department, they're trained for that kind of stuff

why didnt the mouse go for the cheese on the mouse trap it is proven that mice dont actually really like cheese all that much.

a dog walk into a landmine, he exploded.

So there's this boy who really love clowns. His room is adorned with circus and clown posters and his one dream is to go to a circus and see a clown. One day he sees an ad in the newspaper for a circus that was headed toward his town. He begged and pleaded to his parents to let him go, and when they finally agreed he was ecstatic. The boy was in awe of all the things that the circus held, elephants, lions, tightrope walkers and trapeze artists, but there was nothing he was more excited for then the main show with the clowns. He took a seat and out came the clown on a unicycle. The boy was having the time of his life, when the clown suddenly called for someone from the audience. The boy immediately ran to the center of the stage. The clown asked the boy "Are you a horse's head?" then held the mic to the boy. "No," he replied. "Are you a horse's mouth?" "No." "Then you must be a horse's BUTT!" The crowd erupted in laughter and the boy was mortified. He ran out of the circus tent and vowed never to return. He grew up with a hatred for clowns and even had to see multiple therapists. 30 years passed and the boy was now a man. The man looked in his morning paper, only to see that a circus was in town. He decided he would visit one last time. There it was, the elephants and tightrope walkers. And then he saw it, the same clown from 30 years ago in the same show. He walked up and the clown asked the same questions. "Are you a horse's head?" "No." "Are you a horse's mouth?" "No." "Then you must be a horse's BUTT!" Then man the took the microphone from the clown and said, "Screw you clown."

Whats the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash with a sludge hammer, the other is a watermelon

Ask me if I'm a duck. Are you a duck? No.

What has feathers, and is known to fly? A bird

Why did the chicken cross the road? The pen was left open, and it felt slightly curious.

What do you call a black person with a million dollars? A millionaire.

im gay because im gay

What happened when a myriad people decided to partake in a large party while staying in a small room? They managed to make a compromise. The party got split into two groups: 50% of the original total in each casual confinement. In the end, everybody had a great time and nobody got hurt.

Whats the difference between a jew and a boy scout boy scouts come back from camp

roses are red, violets are blue. Barack Obama says, nice to meet you.

Why did the wiener dog fight the cock. Because it was a cock-fight.

lol this is the best joke ever!

I once looked at a hedge that had the same colour leaves as all of the other hedges in that particular area.

Knock knock. Who's ther? Your friend Billy i've been shot and need help

A black walks into a bar Because it is still around the time of segregation, they don't serve colored people

An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have a few drinks, then go to a club, where they amuse each other and those around them by completely slurring their words in their already very strong regional accents. Then they get a taxi back to the house of the Englishman as he lives nearest, and stay the night. The next morning, the Scotsman and the Irishmen walk home as they are still hungover and do not wish to risk driving.

Why did the bartender tell the black man to "Get Out"? It was 4 a.m and the bar closed at 3:30 a.m an honest mistake by the man.

Drunk guy... Hey i just maybe And this is number But here's my crazy So call me met you

Why'd I have sex with your mom? I'm your father and I love your mother very much

what did the teacher say to the kid? you failed the kid cried.

why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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