Drunk guy... Hey i just maybe And this is number But here's my crazy So call me met you

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Q: why did the girl fall off the swing?? A: because she had no arms or legs.

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Q:How many mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A:Just Juan.

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What will you be doing right before you die? ... ... living.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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A 65 year old man is tired with his life. He begins to realize that it is meaningless to him. He wants no part in the world anymore so he decided to commit suicide. On his way to commit suicide, he comes across a magical man that has an extraordinary offer. This magical man has offered to grant the 65 year old man the power to fly. The 65 year old man, accepts the offer in great interest, but the magical man wants something in return for his deed. The 65 year old man, offers all the money in his wallet to the magical man. The magical man accepts his offer of all the money and continues. With a flick of the wrist, the magical man says, "fly, fly, high as the sky, i grant this man the ability to fly". The 65 year old man is greatly excited now that he has the ability to fly. He cant wait to try out his new power. He runs to the nearest cliff and jumps. Too bad the "magical man" was really a male prostitute that was broke and homeless. The 65 year old man died on impact and the male prostitue walked away with a wallet full of cash.

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187

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Asian: what time is it? other person: time for you to open your eyes.

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Why a warm-harted man turned into cold-blooded? He's dead

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What's brown and sticky? Poop.

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Why mommy upset cause wet and sticky make mommy upset

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What do you get when you cross a blonde with Nickelodon? You get Dora because she is allways telling you what to do.

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What did George W. Bush say to his wife when he got home? I'm home.

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What did the adverb say to the noun? Hopefully whale.

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A little boy asked his mom what fucking was, so she showed him.

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Why does a black man break into a car? Because he had closed the windows and locked his keys inside.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have cancer."

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Why did the priest touch the little boy? To Baptise him.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your doorbell is broken.

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Why were the babies used for target practice? Hitler demanded the Nazis to do so.

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What do you call an arab flying a 747? A pliot.

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There's an American, an African, and a Chinese walking down the street. Because the bar is down there.

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A Jew and a Nazi have dinner together...... they both immensely enjoyed the wine.

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Your mama's so old that typical places of business grant her the senior citizen discount.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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