A guy walks into a bar. He now has a broken collar bone.

A man enters a bar, and says: "It is impossible to drown in an elevator" This is incorrect.

Did you hear the one about the Gay Irish Politician who was running for President?! He withdrew his candidacy.

What did the convicted necrophiliac pedophile do when he found a dead baby? He reported it to the authorities because despite his past habits and behaviour, and after years of rehabilitation he became a responsible and considerate citizen

Q: Why did Megan Fox cross the road? A: Because she was running from a giant Decepticon!!! Why else!!!???

Why did the teenager write a joke on here? Because after hours of surfing this website and casually laughing at herself she realized she had no life and the only way to feel happy with her self would be submitting her own to here.

Q. Where do snowmen keep their money? A. A snowman is an anthropomorphic snow sculpture made of frozen water. They therefore cannot earn, keep or have any use for money.

wanna hear a joke? katie chandler

Why is One direction the best thing in the world? Becuz when 5 hot guys met each other they... Sorry I got lost in Zayn's eyes again! Now what were we talking about??????

What has 4 legs and goes "meow." A cat. Dang! You already heard it.

a black guy walks into a bar and the bartender says "get out of here, whites only" this joke takes place in the 1950's when african americans were discriminated against

What do you do when you come across a tiger in the jungle? Wipe it off and apologize.

What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

OK, A plane carrying 200 passengers crashes on the border between America and Canada. Which side of the border do you bury the victims? Well, it would depend on where the passengers where from or what they had stipulated in their living will. I suppose some would be cremated which opens up a whole other can of worms entirely.

How are a duck and a tri-cycle the same? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The pen was left open, and it felt slightly curious.

How do you make a black man cry? A: Kill his whole family.

why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure.

what did one farmer say to the other farmer we are farmers

Why did little Timmy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus.

What is the difference between peanut butter andd jam! Jam is made from crushed fruit and gelatine while peanut butter is made from finely ground peanuts and is often sweetened with sugar.

What did the little boy get for Christmas? Nothing. He's Jewish.

Q. What is worse than being British???? A. Not being British

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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