Q: A black man is walking down the street with a television, where did he just come from? A: Best Buy, he just got a bonus, and wanted to reward himself.

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I like my woman like I like my coffee. Ground up and in the freezer.

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Why a warm-harted man turned into cold-blooded? He's dead

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What's brown and sticky? Poop.

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What to you do when a monkey walks into your bar? Quietly escort it out and into the nearest zoo.

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What did George W. Bush say to his wife when he got home? I'm home.

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What did the adverb say to the noun? Hopefully whale.

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Two monkeys are having sex. They both realize they're boys.

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A little boy asked his mom what fucking was, so she showed him.

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if you are what you eat then you're a hamburger

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How do you kill a blonde woman? Stab her in the stomach so all the acidic contents of her stomach slowly burn her flesh.

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Why did the priest touch the little boy? To Baptise him.

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A 65 year old man is tired with his life. He begins to realize that it is meaningless to him. He wants no part in the world anymore so he decided to commit suicide. On his way to commit suicide, he comes across a magical man that has an extraordinary offer. This magical man has offered to grant the 65 year old man the power to fly. The 65 year old man, accepts the offer in great interest, but the magical man wants something in return for his deed. The 65 year old man, offers all the money in his wallet to the magical man. The magical man accepts his offer of all the money and continues. With a flick of the wrist, the magical man says, "fly, fly, high as the sky, i grant this man the ability to fly". The 65 year old man is greatly excited now that he has the ability to fly. He cant wait to try out his new power. He runs to the nearest cliff and jumps. Too bad the "magical man" was really a male prostitute that was broke and homeless. The 65 year old man died on impact and the male prostitue walked away with a wallet full of cash.

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Why were the babies used for target practice? Hitler demanded the Nazis to do so.

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There's an American, an African, and a Chinese walking down the street. Because the bar is down there.

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What do you call an arab flying a 747? A pliot.

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A man walks into a bar. He says, "Ow, that really hurt."

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Your mama's so old that typical places of business grant her the senior citizen discount.

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Why mommy upset cause wet and sticky make mommy upset

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how do you know if a black man's been on your computer it's gone

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Your moma's so fat, she's got type 2 diabetes

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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where can you find a monkey, a blond, and a bear? the zoo.

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A married man takes the ring off his finger.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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