How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

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A women go hit by a car, what everyone woners though, how did the car get in between the bedroom and the kitchen?

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Wanna here a joke? Womens rights

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Knock Knock. "Who's there?" The cops.

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What came first?....the woman or the sandwich

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Lame Anti Jokes.

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Why is the turkey always full? Because he is stuffed.

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why didnt the mouse go for the cheese on the mouse trap it is proven that mice dont actually really like cheese all that much.

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what did the blind santa say to the jewish child jewish people don't believe in santa...awkward.

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Why did the man murder his wife in cold blood? Because she was alive before he killed her.

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You're mama's so ugly, she will most-likely never meet a compatible mate and die alone.

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How do you divide 2574 by 23.5 WIth a calculator

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Take My Wife- Because as it stands, I'm having frequent, toe-curling, unprotected sex with your wife. And that just doesnt seem fair.

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if a bra is called a over the shoulder boulder holder what is male underware called sincerly, under the butt nut hut

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. Knock knock? Whos there? the Chicken.

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what did the teacher say to the kid? you failed the kid cried.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because him and his girlfriend were in a bad relationship and he needed to get away for a while.

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Why did the blonde driver crossed the red light? Because she has a good notion of physics and realized that the truck that was behind her was too fast to stop in time and if she braked there could have been an accident.

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A sphere rolls around the corner and falls over.

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Why is Jem no longer a cartoon? Because they all died from toxic hairspray.

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Why did the mans nuts itch he had crabs

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Hey, I just met you and i am crazy, but? here's my room key let's make a baby.

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A seal walks into a club...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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