Why did the priest touch the little boy? To Baptise him.

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Your mother is so fat the she is clinically obese.

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Your mama's so old that typical places of business grant her the senior citizen discount.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road Because he did

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What did the guy who had cancer get for Christmas? Death.

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How do you kill a blonde ? Shoot her in the head

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how do you know if a black man's been on your computer it's gone

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a dog walk into a landmine, he exploded.

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Your moma's so fat, she's got type 2 diabetes

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An Englishman, Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They enjoy a few quiet drinks while watching a rugby match between Italy and France on the big screen, which is why they came into this particular bar. The Englishman hopes Italy will win, the Irishman is also supporting Italy while the Scotsman is up for France. France wins the match and the Scotsman says "Good game lads eh?" The others agree.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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How are a duck and a tri-cycle the same? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

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Why were the babies used for target practice? Hitler demanded the Nazis to do so.

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Asian: what time is it? other person: time for you to open your eyes.

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A child in Africa developed Malaria. He became very sick and died.

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read down and see what it is like BEFOR MARRIAGE boy:at last.i can hardly wait! girl:do you want to leave me? boy:NO! dont even think about it! girl:do you love me? boy:ofcourse! always girl:have you ever cheated on me? boy:NO! why are you even asking? girl:will you kiss me ? boy:every chance i get! girl:will you hit me ? boy:hell no! are you crazy ? girl:can i trust you? boy:yes! girl:darling!! read up again and see what it is like AFTER MARRIAGE (L.W)

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Lol, listen, the suggestion lies in the "not not", you are using not twice in your mind, which under trance makes it so your subconcious registers that you are using a double negative while you consciously do not. Look back at the messages and register consciously that you and I have been using "not not" twice during the past messages, when the net shuts down here, you reinforce the "I will totally notnot, tell him" so the suggestion just gets stronger.

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A man walks into a bar. He says, "Ow, that really hurt."

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What did Jack give Jill for Christmas? Herpes.

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Nothing. He's Jewish.

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A man walks into a bar... ouch. He received a minor concussion from the impact of the cement wall, and a slight goose egg on his forehead.

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Women's rights.

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Two monkeys are having sex. They both realize they're boys.

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YO MOMMA SO FAT... that it is really beginning to be an issue.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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