Asian: what time is it? other person: time for you to open your eyes.

How do you make a black man cry? A: Kill his whole family.

a

what did one farmer say to the other farmer we are farmers

Womens rights

Hey, I just met you and i am crazy, but? here's my room key let's make a baby.

What do you call an arab flying a 747? A pliot.

Why did girl cry? Because she recently saw the messy demise of her parent's marriage.

You wanna hear an inside joke? That was one of them.

whats green can fly and has legs? a plane i lied about the legs

What has 4 legs and goes "meow." A cat. Dang! You already heard it.

why do women wear perfume and make-up? 'cause they're ugly and smell bad

What do you call a deaf man? It would be unwise to call him anything, as he would have difficulty hearing you.

Why did the bartender tell the black man to "Get Out"? It was 4 a.m and the bar closed at 3:30 a.m an honest mistake by the man.

How's a raven like a writing desk. you really are alice.

What do you get when you cross and elephant and a dog? Nothing, because you cannot breed creatures of different geniuses.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The pen was left open, and it felt slightly curious.

Girls go to college to get more knowledge. Boys go to Jupiter because they're already smart enough to achieve interplanetary space travel.

how are a plum and a rabbit the same? they are both purple except the rabbit

How do you kill a blonde ? Shoot her in the head

If at first you don't succeed.... maybe skydiving isn't for you...

A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

Women's rights.

Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor. Doctor who? What? No? I'm here to inform you that your child won't be coming out of that coma, I'm sorry.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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