Asian: what time is it? other person: time for you to open your eyes.

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Womens rights

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What did the Dyslexic man write on his Christmas card? Merry Christmas

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Why did the mans nuts itch he had crabs

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Why wasn't the woman in the kitchen? Because she was in the living room.

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A man enters a bar, and says: "It is impossible to drown in an elevator" This is incorrect.

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Knock Knock. "Who's there?" The cops.

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How do you kill a blonde ? Shoot her in the head

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Sarah Palin walks into a bar and the bartender tells her to get the f*&k out.

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Why did the taxi driver kill the blond? He didn't. It's illegal to murder people in most countries.

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You wanna hear an inside joke? That was one of them.

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If at first you don't succeed.... maybe skydiving isn't for you...

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Your mother is so good in the kitchen that we all asked for a second helping.

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Why is the turkey always full? Because he is stuffed.

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Everyone is special in there own ways except for patrick whos demented

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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whats forever alone me

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Why couldn't the boy see? He was dead

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Why did the bartender tell the black man to "Get Out"? It was 4 a.m and the bar closed at 3:30 a.m an honest mistake by the man.

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Drunk guy... Hey i just maybe And this is number But here's my crazy So call me met you

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What's the difference between a bowl of chili and a urologist? One's hot and spicy, and the other analyzes urine [Emo Philips]

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knock knock who's there? Kallie Kallie who? sorry, wrong house

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What is worse than getting a 30% on a test? Getting a 29% on a test.

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Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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