How did Hellen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room.

a

what did one farmer say to the other farmer we are farmers

Michael J. Fox asked me if I wanted my drink shaken or stirred, did I really have a choice?

A man walks into a bar. He says, "Ow, that really hurt."

A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

Oh

What's worse than finding ten babies nailed to a tree? One baby nailed to ten trees

What did George W. Bush say to his wife when he got home? I'm home.

What did the adverb say to the noun? Hopefully whale.

A little boy asked his mom what fucking was, so she showed him.

Why can't blondes change a lightbulb? Because they're women

if you are what you eat then you're a hamburger

Why did the girl drown? Well, the girl probably did drown because she was within the ages of 3-5 years old, and she probably had a physical incapapbilty and she could not swim so her parents didn't save her.

Why did the girl pee her pants? She was only 1 month old...

Yo mama's so fat that I make Yo Mama jokes about her!!

where can you find a monkey, a blond, and a bear? the zoo.

A monkey enters a bar and climbs up on a stool. The bartender asks, "What'll ya have, pal?" The monkey, who can niether speak nor understand English, appears slightly perplexed.

What's the difference between a gay white man and a gay black man? Nothing because they are both sexually attracted to men.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

SNAPPLE!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because him and his girlfriend were in a bad relationship and he needed to get away for a while.

Q: A black man is walking down the street with a television, where did he just come from? A: Best Buy, he just got a bonus, and wanted to reward himself.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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